A third trimester mini meltdown
Just a little teeny tiny rant, I promise.
My to-do list is piling up once again, both at work and at home. In fact I don’t know which is longer. In order to get everything done that I need to do I imagine I’d have to stay awake 24 hours, every day for the next three months.
Not really, but that’s how it feels.
That to-do before #2 list? Totally back burner, I have a new, more urgent to-do before #2 list that I wrote up last night. Things like setting up a place for the baby to sleep, getting Lil’ J a new bed so the baby can have a crib. And then more enjoyable things like sewing nursery decorations and baby clothes.
I still have my regular tasks at work, and side-writing jobs I need to not fall behind on stay on top of, and even get ahead in some cases. There just doesn’t seem to be enough hours in the day.
I’m debating putting in more hours at work to get ahead, and implementing earlier bed times, and implementing a currently non-existent weekend nap time for my first-born, so I can accomplish everything. But then comes the fear that I’m going to regret my manic antics once the baby comes. My daughter’s last few months as an only child may become a blur, and a month into having a new baby I’ll be cursing my 3-month-younger-self for not saying “screw it” and sleeping in while I could.
There I go again with the fear of making the wrong choice.
Here is where I get positive…
I can do this. If I’ve managed to balance a million things with one child well by golly, I’m going to do it better than ever these last three months. And my husband reminded me that I’ll have 12 weeks off with my oldest daughter anyway, so even if her last 11 weeks as an only child wind up in a whirlwind, her first few months as a big sister will be with her mama by her side, helping her transition.
Let the countdown commence. A million things to do, 10 weeks 4 days to go!
Tags: baby, mini meltdown, pregnancy #2, rant, thoughts
My oldest didn’t nap when number two came, so I had to get creative with activities that would entertain her for long periods of time. Here’s a few.
A bowl of water and a paintbrush. Let her “paint” the porch.
Stick her in an empty tub with shaving cream.
Put sand in a bowl and hide mini treasures
Pre-record yourself reading a book and have her listen to it
Thanks so much for all of these awesome tips!
I am feeling a lot of pressure, too. I only have seven weeks left, if that, and given how I’ve been feeling lately, I’m afraid it’s going to be much less. I put together a ton of furniture this weekend (my husband is not good at it) for my son’s big boy room, and finally got all of his stuff moved over. But the baby’s room needs to be painted (not by us–totally farming that one out), and that’s holding up my process of getting out the baby stuff to wash, putting the side back on the crib and moving up the mattress, and just generally getting everything else ready. I need to pull out the car seat and bases, the vibrating chair, and whatever else…but don’t want to do it without a place to put it, which all goes back to getting the room painted. So I need to call painters ASAP…and totally keep putting it off. And in the meantime I’m trying to savor the time with my son. I’ve thought about the earlier bedtime, too. I’ve been sleeping in as much as possible on weekends because I know those days are limited! At least you want to keep your daughter home with you during maternity leave…I am totally sending my older son to daycare (though maybe on a reduced schedule…we’ll see how he is with the baby to see if I can manage two at once!)…
Good for you for tackling so much! I’m hoping that burse of energy and motivation will hit me soon cause right now it’s a bit dry. And don’t get me wrong, I’m totally considering letting my daughter stay in preschool for a month or so after #2 is born. I’m not decided for sure yet but as much as I want to be like “I can’t do this!” I’m sorta like “…Eh, but maybe I don’t want to just yet”. Let me know how manading two at once goes! On my way to work this morning I was thinking “How will I get two kids out of the tub and dry and ready for bed?” these simple things seem like they’ll be impossible once there’s another. I know this probably sounds totally silly to any parent of more than one.
When I was pregnant with my second someone told me that maternity leave with the second is nothing like it was the first time and boy were they right. Much busier and it was no vacation that’s for sure. Monday I’m headed back to work and a small part of me is a little bit excited….just a small part.
Oh my goodness I’m SO scared about this! You have no idea. Like what if I go crazy? Stay at home moms don’t go crazy… Do they? If they can do it I can do it… These are the things I tell myself, setting myself up for failure I’m sure.
If anyone can do it all, you can! BUT no one expects you to, I’m sure. If you have to go into survival mode and only focus on putting fires out as you go, no one would blame you. I admire all that you do, girl! You are amazing… And there IS no wrong choice. It’s just a choice! There will be a million other choices after that one, so don’t get hung up on just one. š
Thanks so much mama! You are so sweet. I think i can be guilty of taking on too much–like many moms. Gotta let some stuff go or burn! haha.
I don’t have an essay to write š but just know that I believe in you!
Thanks mama! That is enough, and means a lot!
You can do it. Deciding what IT is will be the hard part. Stop worrying about what you think you SHOULD be doing and instead use your gut to decide what you want to do and absolutely need to do. You could ask your friends if you could borrow a crib for a few months if you didnt want to stress about a brand new bed asap. Just be sure to enjoy this time, however you need to.
You are so right. I WON’T stress about this. That’s one thing I would regret. So I’m gonna enjoy these last minute preps and let go what’s gotta go. So what if my 2nd kid’s nursery isn’t as cute and planned as the first? It’s probably just the start of many things that will be different this time around š
rant away! Although, you have nothing to worry about. You’re gonna be a great mom to both your lil ones… hang in there! Things will get done when they get done. š
Have you considered using a bassinette for the first few weeks?
I think they are way convenient, and may help lil j transition to her own big-girl bed, and with more time, without feeling like the new sib is taking over her “turf” so-to-speak.
Just remember, you can never truly be “ready” for a baby. No one ever is. So no matter how much, or little, you get done- it will still all fall into place.
Definitely enjoy this time with lil J. I would focus on getting the basics done as far as the nursery-crib, curtains, organizing the room & packing your hospital bag and then catch up on your work related obligations. Since babies sleep pretty much around the clock those first weeks you’ll have plenty of time to finish all of the other fun sewing projects on your list. Also, don’t forget to delegate or enlist the help of family and friends!
I find when I get in tizzies like this that when I just do a couple of things (set up crib, or order big bed, or sort some clothes) I feel instantly calmer. To me it sounds like you are in need of a little bonding/nesting time with the bump: folding teeny tiny clothes, going to BabiesRUs and buying some pacis or similar. Can you maybe plan a mother-daughter day with Lil J, and a mother & bump day by yourself?
And the writing gigs, maybe you can ask to reduce the frequency? I’m sure they’d understand!