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The Things I’m Going to Miss Part 4

I know without a shadow of a doubt that I will miss this precious thing more than anything else on my list. More than my slim figure, more than having late nights out with friends and oh yes, even more than sporadic sex. This cherished item I speak of gives me life, it gives me joy, it gives me an escape from this crazy yet sometimes unbelievably boring world I live in. It’s a process no one… Especially not I, can live without, and I’m not sure I can cordially function with less of it. And if… No, when I’m forced to I fear those around me will suffer the wrath as I transform into a vicious beast. Oh yea, that’s what happens when I don’t get to sleep.

I have a love/hate relationship with sleep. I’m writing this now as I’m fighting to stay awake on one of my days off. I’m extremely mad that the sleep demon has taken over my body and it forcing me to be tired and take long naps all day. Naps are nice yes, but not on my days off. I like to go go go and sleep only gets in the way.

But that’s my only complaint about sleep. Other than that I love it. And I mean it when I say: Please… Don’t wake me up from my dearest dreams unless you have a bundle of chocolate covered strawberries in your arms. …Can babies make those?

I was surprised how quickly I was able to jump out of bed and take care of my needy puppy when I first got him, but that instinct left just as quickly as I developed it and now when he whimpers at night I kick my husband out of bed.

Scared is an understatement of how I feel about having a child and loosing sleep. That and the fact that I hear it’s more than just a loss of sleep it’s like… No more naps? No more sleeping when I want? You mean, I have to do what the crying thing tells ME to? Well I brought the son of a gun into this world…

Do you know how often I sleep in until 9, 10… Heck, 1 if I want to?! I get to decide when I wake up and when I go to sleep and I LOVE it. To have that privilege sacrificed… Ugh. I’m getting all worked up just thinking about it.

A woman I work with just laughs at me when I tell her I’m tired. She just got back from maternity leave and frequently comes in expressing how few hours of sleep she got the night before. I get a migraine just thinking of being in that situation.

How do you get over it? I know you’re going to tell me it comes natural but really, what if it doesn’t? Do I really just have to say goodbye to sleeping whenever I want to? What if I invested in those nice Boss headphones? Could I pump enough milk so that hubby could wake up in the ridiculous hours of the night? Forget taking turns, I’d trade him a tubal ligation for waking up every night for the crying babies.

Maybe I’m really not cut out for this parenting thing.

(Maybe)

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Nightly Notion
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Another friend of mine told me she might be pregnant. I’ll be crossing some more names off my list very soon… Jerks!


Goldibug says:

You never get used to the no sleeping thing. Eventually your kids need you less during the night and more sleep seeps into your schedule. For me this occured around the babies three month birthday. To me the worst part of having a baby is the ‘no sleep’. You have a love for your baby that is undescribable. Sometimes is occurs immediatly after the baby is born and other times it takes a few weeks. Either way you love them. Because of this love you get your butt out of bed and feed the baby. Most of the time your husband is off sawing logs and you won’t see his open eyes until morning. He’ll claim he never heared the baby. I think this is just an excuse for them to go back to bed after we get the baby quiet again. I’m making the first year sound horrible but I promise it isn’t. It’s just a huge opportunity to grow up. We tend to get very selfish as we reach adult hood. Who wants to give away all the luxuries we just inherited by moving out of our parents house so soon? Being a parent is totally worth it and I would never take it back. I don’t think anything in the world could possibly prepare you for having your first child. Everything under the sun will push you in one direction or the other. Having a kid is like driving. You’re super excited for it to happen but scared of the possible consiquences. This is one thing you just need to dive into and do. If you’ve always wanted to be a mom and the only thing holding you back is giving up lives luxeries then you need to ask yourself if you’re ready to grow up or not. Should’ve, would’ve, could’ves aren’t going to get you anywhere ever. You need to make that decision. I hope some of this helps and if not pretend you never read it 😉

Brittanie says:

This I can TOTALLY relate to. My husband can testify to the fact that I am nobody’s friend when I am sleep deprived. When we went on a cruise together and he woke up before me and opened all the blinds, I nearly killed him because I was still tired.

Anyway, at first you run on adrenaline, like you mentioned with your puppy. Then, the baby slowly starts to sleep longer and so do you. I woke up one morning after getting 6 hours of sustained sleep SO worried that my daughter had died. Then I realized she had just slept.

The best advice I can give is, if you’re still working, take your maternity leave for all it’s worth and sleep when the baby sleeps. This is hard because there is other stuff that falls by the wayside when you just sleep all the time. But you HAVE to if you want to feel like more than a walking zombie. Take naps when the baby takes naps and you will feel a million times better.

The sleep thing is hard though, and sometimes you just have to say, “Honey, please feed the baby a bottle; I know you have work in the morning, but I am at my wits end!” He’ll rise to the occasion.

Randi says:

I agree with the first person. You NEVER get used to the no sleep thing. I have completely forgotten what a real night sleep and sleeping in feel like. I miss it terribly!

I got your basket today! THANK YOU! I love the headbands. I had a friend I was going to give them to, but they are too cute, I don’t know if I can part with them. I might have to just save them for when (IF) ever I have a little girl!

Mallory says:

Really, when the baby is little, you can just sleep when the baby sleeps, and it’s not so bad. As for waking up in the middle of the night, I never really had too much of a problem with that. We co-sleep in our home, so when my son wakes up, I don’t have to get out of bed, I just roll over and stick him on the boob. Easy as pie. Of course, that didn’t work so well when he couldn’t latch on the greatest (about the first 6 weeks or so) and when he would fill his diaper right after nursing (about the first couple months). But now, I only have to get out of bed for myself! Like I said, easy as pie!

Mommy Bee says:

Yeah, i miss sleeping through the night…then again, if you breastfeed and co-sleep you’ll get a lot more sleep (and feel a lot less interrupted) than if you have to get up to rock/bottlefeed the baby through the night.

Jenna says:

Well, for one thing, co-sleeping doesn’t always mean more sleep. In fact, in my case, when I tried it the first week, we didn’t sleep at all! I woke up to every peep Audrey made, worried about smothering her, and couldn’t get comfortable. Audrey woke up more as well. As soon as she went into her own room, it was like magic. We ALL slept better. I did actually enjoy getting up and sitting in the rocking chair to feed her. It was a peaceful, intimate time.

I guess I am one of the lucky ones when it comes to a sleeping baby; Audrey began sleeping 10 hours a night at 8 weeks. By four months, she was sleeping 12 hours a night, which is what she does now. She also naps for 2-3 hours a day. She is a great sleeper.

I also have a considerate husband who gets up with Audrey every morning when she wakes up at 7, and feeds her breakfast. He knows how important it is for me to sleep (I have a history of insomnia and sleepwalking). He also gets up if she happens to wake up in the middle of the night. He’s a saint and I love him for it.

As for napping, well, sometimes I’ll go with Audrey in her room, close the door, and let her play while I nap on the floor. We’ve never had any catastrophes happen this way. I like to use her nap time to catch up on housework and other things I can’t do when she’s awake.

Yolanda says:

I’m a huge fan of sleep and couldn’t imagine living without it. So honestly I prayed and had faith I’d get a wonderfully sleeping baby. Both of my boys were good sleepers at night- my oldest never did much napping during the day though. Plus you are married- the shared nighttime duties were no problem for my husband. We did cosleep with son #1 but I wound up not sleeping much because I spent all night staring at him to make sure he was ok lol.

heather says:

This has been one thing I have struggled with. Even know my kids sleep through the night…I just wish I could wake up whenever i wanted to. It get’s easier, as long as you have a good attitude about it. Oh and when they do start getting older they get the same sleeping schedule so then that means….Nap time for you! But then again I hear once you have three the naps are long gone. But remember….baby steps. With your first you will take naps when they take naps.

Jenna says:

Oh, and guess what? I just got your package!! Darling headbands, girl. Seriously, you are talented. 🙂

I love sleep and I could sleep for 24 hours easily LOL but when my baby was little I guess maternal instinct LOL kicked in and I had no problem waking up doing the night for my baby. I also took naps with her doing the day. And when she started sleeping longer doing the night I did too. It worked out. It’s still working out 🙂

Hmmmm, maybe you will start to think, look at all of the things I get done being awake, this is crazy I cant believe how many more things I can accomplish (even hobbies) this is great, no more sleeping in. If not at some point your children get old enough that you get a tiny bit more sleep, and then I guess there is always emergen-c, and chlorophyll for energy

Pregnancy actually prepares you for the no sleeping part. And you actually survive on less sleep and are still the same person, remarkably.
My daughter now *almost* sleeps through the night (she’s 19 months….ugh) and when she sleeps through the night I sleep worse than if she woke me up a million times. I am so used to her waking up at 3 in the morning, that if she doesn’t, I wake up naturally and walk into her room without realizing she hasn’t woken up yet.
It’s definitely something to get used to though. I never had my husband do the late night stuff or get up with the baby or anything, just because I nursed and it was a hassle to pump. I did it when I started work again, but I hated it. It took 8 times longer (my girl nursed completely in about 3 minutes) and pumping was just hard. I had tons and tons of milk too, so if I pumped more than necessary I truly would have had enough for 8 gallons of milk.
But pregnancy really does help you out. You are more and more tired the longer it goes, but you don’t feel it as much. And when the baby is born, you are so excited that you aren’t “pregnant tired” anymore, getting 3 hours in a row is a complete blessing!

Keya says:

You can kiss sleep goodbye in the beginning. I use to take a nap every day I would get home after work. I definately don’t do that anymore. In the beginning the baby is on his own schedule, eating every 3-5 hrs. So you sleep when they sleep. The only thing is adults don’t do that great with interrupted sleep. Fortunately it gets better when your baby learns how to sleep through out the night. It’s so wonderful. And if your husband is as sweet as mine he will let you nap while he watches the baby, and you guys can switch turns too. It’s so good.
Also in the beginning make sure you take a nap when the baby naps. Don’t try to clean the house etc…get as much sleep as you can…it will keep you sane. Trust me.

Nichole says:

I’m SO scared of this too! I’m a monster when I’m underslept, not to mention that my immune system crashes. Millions have gone before and lived to tell about it, so I figure I will too.

I’m gunna be the last one on your “babyless list” 🙂

Mammatalk says:

You’ll figure it out! It is tough in the beginning, but you do adjust. I feel I sleep deeper now and can survive on less sleep.

Abby says:

Sure babies can make chocolate covered strawberries. If you threaten them enough. I hope.

Abby says:

Oh, and I have nothing useful to add at all. I’m still not getting enough sleep so I don’t know what to say.

Hooray! I’m not helpful!

Scribbit says:

Oh it goes pretty fast. You only have babies around for such a short time and then it’s over–you get through it.

Tamara says:

I have a similar love/hate relationship with sleep. I can sleep 12, 13, 14 hours and not bat an eye. Im even scared of getting a PUPPY (yes we’ve been waiting a few years considering even a puppy lol), let alone a baby. Hubby thinks Im the meanest thing walking when i dont get my sleep. When i get up in the mornings, the first thing I think of coming back home so I can go back to sleep.

So, yea, i most definitely feel you on this post and it makes me wonder what kind of mama i will be. I’m sure I will deal with it accordingly, but oh lawd, sleep deprivation has me shaking in my boots just imagining it.

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Hi! I’m Jennifer Borget

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I'm a former journalist, and lifelong creator striving to make the world a better place. This is the space where I share my journey in making the most of every day by cherishing our individuality and celebrating our differences.



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