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The Shocking News

I had a dream the other night about a friend of mine… A friend at work being pregnant. I told her a few days later about my dream, about how real it felt and how sure I was that she could have been pregnant. We talk about kids, babies a lot. Our baby itch, and urges. I was sure that’s why I was having the dream. For kicks and giggles we looked up the meaning for dreaming about friends being pregnant and couldn’t find any. A few days later I think I found the meaning…
Another friend of mine…One of my closest, best friends told me she’s pregnant. My dream was the same day she found out. She also swore me to secrecy. She’s only told another mutual friend and her husband the news, and she’s terrified. I couldn’t believe it, but the first emotion that surged through my body was jealousy. The second, only a millisecond later was extreme excitement. I couldn’t believe it. But really… She was one of the last people I thought I’d cross off my “cool list.” I really thought I’d have a child before her so this is probably some of the biggest news I’ve heard in a long time.
She’s married. We’ve hung out together as couples and done things in the past. She and I have talked a little about kids… We both have a lot in common and waiting to have kids is/was a common denominator.
She told me how this came as a surprise to her. She missed a week of birth control, awaiting a new pack. Then went back on, but didn’t use another form of BC during the first week back on it. She thought they’d be fine but apparently she’s pretty fertile.
I’m so excited for her, and I am also spontaneously turning into an emotional wreck. She told me while I was at work, and an hour or two later it just hit me. It was so bad, I choked up while I was anchoring! No seriously, I was struggling through one of my scripts and had a hard time pulling it together. Luckily I was talking about death and fires so it sort of fit, but I had to get a grip before the cheery Valentines stuff.
I’ve already taken the roll of being her never-been-pregnant not-even-a-mom advisor. I’m practically planning her baby shower already! I’m really excited for her. She told me she doesn’t know anyone her age with kids and I told her she should come to my church ;o) (If you’re LDS you know what I mean).
She also said she’s really nervous about providing for her child, continuing her career, gaining weight… A lot of things I’ve mentioned here. And while she told me she wished she had been thinking about the same things I’ve been thinking of the past year I just sat, listening, and wishing I was in her shoes. Yea, it’ll be hard, it’ll be a struggle, and you weren’t expecting it. But it happened! What are you going to do? All you can do is be happy now!
I think I’m emotional because I’m shocked… I didn’t expect it. And because we are SO much alike–Knowing she’s having a child now makes me think I could do it. I think I’m jealous because getting pregnant unexpectedly takes so much pressure off. You just have to go with it. I think I’m a little pissed too… No wait, I think that’s just the jealousy talking.
What has gotten into me?! Am I actaully saying I want one because she’s having one? Seriously? WTF? I think it’s more that that but I can’t explain it. Can anyone explain this emotion? If I want a freakin’ baby I can have a freakin’ baby, so why am I jealous someone else, one of my best friends beat me to it?
So I just thought I’d journal about this extreme turn of events that’s left me shocked, and feeling a hint of whiplash from my change in desires and decisions.
And seriously, if one more person tells me they’re pregnant right now, I think I may punch them something…
Just kidding.
…Sortof. I may just scream and cry in my pillow.


Angela says:

I think what you are feeling is normal. Until I was really ready to have childern all of my friends around me were getting pregnant and I wondered if maybe I should have joined the party. But I’m glad I waited until I was really ready. So stay on course with your thoughts of when you are ready to have your baby.

My best friend got pregnant before me with her first kid, and I was so jealous I felt terrible. Then she got pregnant with her second and I kind of wanted to punch her in the face lol.

It is perfectly normal to be jealous about it. But you have to do what is right with you, not just because everyone else is having kids. Someone in my family did that and there marriage is suffering pretty heavily because they figured since other parts of the family were having kids, they should too.

Just make sure it’s for you and no one else.

Goldibug says:

I think it’s because you’d really like to have a baby right now but you’re still scared considering the economy and all. This happened to me to. It’s like you feel as though you’re being left behind because everyone around you got pregnant first. It sucks. It makes you mad and excited and you want to lash out at everyone getting pregnant because you haven’t gotten pregnant yet. You wish it would just happen like some kind of surprise although it wouldn’t seem like a huge surprise because you wanted it so badly. If you’re husband is ready to have kids maybe you two should try. What’s the worst that can happen? You’ll actually get pregnant and have the baby you’ve been waiting for? On the other hand you can fight with yourself about getting pregnant and keep wondering when/if it’ll ever happen. People think it’s absolutly ridiculous when I tell them I am more scared of driving than I am of being a mom. The reason why is because wether you think you’re ready or not being a mom comes naturally. Driving doesn’t…at least not for me. It’s a lot of hard work and you do have a lot less time for yourself and your husband but as long as you two parent together you’ll see waterfalls of rewards as your baby grows. Remember that if all else fails start praying about it.

Keya says:

Maybe you’ll be next.

Sombra says:

I think all of your emotions on this subject are very common.. and very real.. feel them and don’t deny them..

And.. when the day does come for your body to receive life.. why not consider an unassisted birth – and unassisted pregnancy. If it ever becomes something you want to investigate, try reading at ChristianUC.com Joining is a bit of an issue right now – there’s no admin to the group, but if the idea strikes your fancy, there are plenty of groups to join. The more you know about pregnancy and birth, the easier your birth will be.. even if you don’t decide to do it unassisted. Gaining knowledge of the whole birth culture is something that is missing from our society – we don’t pass down the knowledge from mama to daughter, because most women today don’t have large families, so a teenage daughter doesn’t get to witness her mother giving birth, or her sister giving birth. We need to rebuild that knowledge, and restore that purity and beauty of the first moment of life.

Sombra – http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/morelittlewilsons

I don’t know what to tell you…all I can say in some point we all felt like it and when you have a baby make sure you’re having it because you really want it, not because everyone else is so you’ll fit in some circle 🙂

Quiskaeya says:

I think what you are going through is very natural. It’s a normal part of the journey to motherhood to feel excitement, anger, jealousy, fear, apprehension and loads of other emotions.

Have you read the book “Taking Charge of Your Fertility” by Toni Weschler. EXCELLENT book. Seriously. Whether you are trying to get preggers, trying to not get preggers it has all the info you need to understand your body and make informed decision in a natural that is in sync with your body.

Oh and if you want to get another view of Mamahood upfront and unscripted you need to check out my post “The not-so-glamorous life of a Queen.” lol

Goldibug says:

I think it’s because you’d really like to have a baby right now but you’re still scared considering the economy and all. This happened to me to. It’s like you feel as though you’re being left behind because everyone around you got pregnant first. It sucks. It makes you mad and excited and you want to lash out at everyone getting pregnant because you haven’t gotten pregnant yet. You wish it would just happen like some kind of surprise although it wouldn’t seem like a huge surprise because you wanted it so badly. If you’re husband is ready to have kids maybe you two should try. What’s the worst that can happen? You’ll actually get pregnant and have the baby you’ve been waiting for? On the other hand you can fight with yourself about getting pregnant and keep wondering when/if it’ll ever happen. People think it’s absolutly ridiculous when I tell them I am more scared of driving than I am of being a mom. The reason why is because wether you think you’re ready or not being a mom comes naturally. Driving doesn’t…at least not for me. It’s a lot of hard work and you do have a lot less time for yourself and your husband but as long as you two parent together you’ll see waterfalls of rewards as your baby grows. Remember that if all else fails start praying about it.

I don’t know what to tell you…all I can say in some point we all felt like it and when you have a baby make sure you’re having it because you really want it, not because everyone else is so you’ll fit in some circle 🙂

My best friend got pregnant before me with her first kid, and I was so jealous I felt terrible. Then she got pregnant with her second and I kind of wanted to punch her in the face lol.

It is perfectly normal to be jealous about it. But you have to do what is right with you, not just because everyone else is having kids. Someone in my family did that and there marriage is suffering pretty heavily because they figured since other parts of the family were having kids, they should too.

Just make sure it’s for you and no one else.

Angela says:

I think what you are feeling is normal. Until I was really ready to have childern all of my friends around me were getting pregnant and I wondered if maybe I should have joined the party. But I’m glad I waited until I was really ready. So stay on course with your thoughts of when you are ready to have your baby.

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Hi! I’m Jennifer Borget

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I'm a former journalist, and lifelong creator striving to make the world a better place. This is the space where I share my journey in making the most of every day by cherishing our individuality and celebrating our differences.



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