Posts Tagged ‘He says she says’

“Hey, are you suppose to bring a date to the wedding or am I not invited or what?” I asked my husband as he told me his plans to attend a co-worker’s wedding last weekend. It was a couple days before the event and he had never mentioned bringing me with him.

“Do you want to come? I mean, I’m sure it would be ok if you came, it’s not like you weren’t invited. I didn’t know if you wanted to go,” he said. “But I was just going to go with some guys from work.”

“Well, I mean, I’m fine either way. Normally I thought you’d bring a date to a wedding though.”

I haven’t been to a slew of weddings myself, but the few non-Mormon ones I’ve attended definitely seem to be a “bring a date” (or definitely your spouse) type of event.

do you bring a date to a wedding? He says/ she says

(Pictured above is us back in 2008 st his sister’s wedding). 

I didn’t push it. My husband rarely gets out, and if he was looking forward to a night out with friends I didn’t want to get in the way of that. I figured they had talked about it and worked it out.

Saturday rolled around and I took the kids out while he went to the wedding. Minutes before it started I get a text from him.

He says: I should have brought you.
(I’m thinking): Ha! I TOLD YOU!
She says: It’s ok, just don’t grind on anyone on the dance floor.

I thought he felt bad for not bringing me but the longer I thought about it, the more it seemed likely that he was embarrassed about not having a date.

About an hour later I get a text from a friend.

Friend says: What are you guys up to?
I say: The kids and I are at a birthday party and B is at a wedding.
Friend says: Alone?!
I say: I know right?!
She says: WHY?
I say: I think he planned on going with friends…
She said: Like a bro fest watching a football game? Hahaha.
I say: Ok, so I’m not crazy, that IS weird?
Friend says: Yea, that’s weird. I would have started a fight over there! You’re so nice!
I say: Well he’s probably paying for it now.

A couple hours later I check in with him (who also volunteered to be the designated driver).
She says: So are you the only one dateless?
He says:
She says: How was the wedding?
He says: Everyone is dancing. Awkward, I’m by myself!
She says: So were you like the homecoming chaperone driving everyone and their wives to the party?
He says: They’re all drunk now, they won’t remember this later.
She says: I asked if I should come, people normally bring dates to weddings.
He says: Yea, would have been nice to know… Yesterday!

He came home and told me how everyone asked where I was and he had to sit alone and have seating rearranged. It was awkward but he couldn’t leave because he had to drive people home. If you know my husband you know sad/hilarious this is.

He apologized and said he’d never make that mistake again, (though all of our friends are married so the opportunity seems unlikely now anyway). I went easy on him since I knew he felt bad about the situation already. But don’t get it twisted, I’m going to enjoy using my “your wife is right” card for a quite while.

Did you know it was common practice to bring a date (or I mean, at least your spouse) to a wedding?

After going round and round with Lil’ J about what she wanted to be for Halloween, we finally settled on Tinkerbell. We’ve been working to get a family costume coordinated.

Lil’ J already failed to convince her daddy to be Peter Pan so she settled for Captain Hook.

I sent my husband a text message with the costume I found, and it went something like this:

She says: Hey babe, I just ordered your Halloween costume!

Captain Hook Costume he says/ she says

He says: Oh hell no…

She says: Come on!! We are all going as Peter Pan characters and the kids will think you’re SO cool!

He says: They already do.

He is a cool dad, but this would give him major bonus points–at least with me. I showed a picture of the costume to Lil’ J, and told her she should ask daddy if he’ll wear it. She looked at the photo on my phone, gave it back to me and said, “Um, I don’t want him to get mad at me.” Poor thing probably had flashbacks of when she asked him to be Peter Pan.

A couple days later, I heard my husband announcing he had a secret to tell our daughter that she couldn’t tell me. They huddled and whispered over homework. They do this every now and then so I didn’t think anything of it and forgot how hard it was for my daughter to keep a secret… Until the next afternoon when she told me “Daddy says if I practice my numbers every day he’ll be Captain Hook for Halloween!”

My heart leapt. Oh, we could do that. Of course I hadn’t actually ordered the costume, but now I basically had his blessing. (Between you and me, I just ordered one even more elaborate).

Will he actually wear it? It’ll come down to Halloween night, we’ll see. It’ll be the first of a few battles that night, I’m sure. Others will be convincing our little Peter Pan to stay with us and not run away. Making sure our Tinker Bell doesn’t eat any candy before we inspect it (though she’s generally good about this). And arguing with Captain Hook about which houses are indeed passing out candy.

The general rule of thumb is if the porch lights are on, it’s game. But my husband likes to also see a certain amount of Halloween decorations out front before approaching. Just how many tricks it takes to meet his quota, I’m not sure. But we wind up skipping a lot.


According to Allstate, I’m right that the porch light is a good indicator, while dark houses are probably not participating.

Here are 5 more tips from Allstate to keep us all safe this Halloween:

  • Take a working flashlight and/or glow sticks to make sure you and your kids are visible from afar. You can also add reflective tape to costumes and bags to increase visibility.
  • Be sure to walk only on sidewalks, and to take extra caution when crossing streets. Never dart out from behind parked vehicles.
  • Stick to familiar homes and neighborhoods or pre-plan where you will trick-or-treat.
  • Shoes should fit well and costumes should be short enough so that your trick-or-treater won’t trip over their costume. If you buy or make a costume, use materials that are flame-resistant
  • Homeowners: Keep pets, even if they’re friendly, indoors. They might frighten children or accidentally get loose.

And one I should have thought of last year when my little sister came along and decided to ditch us for her friends: Choose a meeting place just in case your children get separated from the group.

You can read-up on more Halloween safety tips here before this weekend.

I’ll let you know Saturday if he wears the costume. You’d better believe there will be LOTS of proof wonderful family pictures documenting the sweet occasion.

Are you dressing up for Halloween? What is your family going as?

Important Halloween Safety Tips

This post was written as part of the Allstate Influencer Program and sponsored by Allstate. All opinions are mine. As the nation’s largest publicly held personal lines insurer, Allstate is dedicated not only to protecting what matters most–but to guiding people to live the Good Life, every day.

We don’t argue about who is going to take out the trash. The night before trash day my husband sets the trash and recycling bins outside. He’s awesome and does this for us every week. Every week we also have tons of recycling overflowing from the tiny bin our city gives us, so we fill cardboard boxes with the excess recycling and set it outside next to the other containers.

interracial family he says she says

I always worry that the waste collectors (yes, I just googled the PC term for garbage men) will mistake our recycling as trash, and yesterday as I heard the garbage truck go by, I looked at the window, and to my horror, I saw our recycling bin already empty, and the garbage men grabbed and dumped our extra boxes in their truck.

She Says: I’m so mad!! I just saw the garbage man take our two extra boxes of recycling! We need to separate them more or something! Recycling already came and didn’t take it!
He Says (sarcastically): Oh no, the world is coming to an end!
She says: Well it might if everything winds up in a big dump! Especially things that can be reused!
He Says: There must have been something in there that the recycling can’t take.
She Says: Or maybe I just need to write a big sign that says “RECYCLING” next week and tape it on everything!
He Says:

About an hour later I noticed the garbage truck come by and take the huge garbage bin that had yet to be emptied.

She Says: Oh… Never mind, the recycling truck looks just like the garbage truck! Here’s the garbage truck now.
He Says: WOW…

We just got back from spending a week in Utah and man, I forgot how beautiful it is there.

When my husband and I lived there we didn’t have our own children, but his family get-togethers always involved LOTS of kids. I didn’t appreciate it then, but now that we have two rug rats of our own, I’ve come to understand the advantages of having a big family.

Kids of all ages were running around around in the yard at a family get together last weekend. Lil’ J adored all of the little cousins (once removed) who came up to her and asked to play. At one point she came up to me and asked me who all of these people were and how everyone knew her name and I told her: “They’re your family! All of daddy’s cousins.”

What kids think of big families.

She grinned so big. “My family?” She skipped off running to play again.

I thought she was rather impressed, but was surprised when she relayed her thoughts to her daddy when he picked us up from the airport yesterday.

As we pulled out of the parking garage and he asked how our trip was she got right to it.

She Says: Daddy, you have enough cousins.
He Says: Enough? What do you mean?
She Says: I mean you have enough cousins.
He Says: I have a lot of cousins?
She Says: Yes. I mean you have too much cousins.
He Says: Too many?
She says: Yea.

I tried my best to stifle my laugh, then see if I could interpret her statement as a positive, asking her if she had fun with all of her daddy’s cousins, and she said she did, and that she can’t wait to see them again.

We had such a good time in Utah, each day was filled with something fun and different. I have a gazillion photos to share but for now I’ll start with this one of my kiddos with their cool Uncle Matt, whom they adore. 


For the past couple of months I’ve realized Big T is drawn to the color pink. He started pointing out colors (thanks YouTube) and his favorite to point out is pink.

We’ll be walking through the house and he’ll yell “PINK!” and point to Barbie car or one of his sister’s many tutus. I love dressing my kids in bright colors and the boy clothing can be so dull. So I jump at any bright colored shirt in the boys aisle at my favorite consignment store.

A few months ago that meant me picking up a pink button-down shirt for my son. Just the other day as I went to put a different shirt on him he noticed his pink one in the clean laundry basket and said “No blue. PINK!” And so I put it on.

I find it adorable. It’s my favorite color too. And my husband doesn’t seem to mind like he once insinuated he would. But a couple of instances this week makes me wonder if my son is pushing his luck.

My husband came home from a shopping trip with our son and told me as they went down the cereal aisle Big T saw Elsa on a box and yelled “LET IT GO!”

He said it was hilarious and I told him he hadn’t seen nothing yet.

I pulled up the song on YouTube and set it in front of our son before stepping back to let my husband watch the show.

Big T watches the first few bars but then as soon as it gets to the “Conceal don’t feel, don’t let them…” Big T let out a huge… “KNOOOOOOWWW… they KNOOOOOOOOW! Let it go. Let it go!…” With choreographed hand motions.

I looked at my husband whose eyes were wide with amusement and shock.

“Ok buddy, hand over your man card,” he said.

friends- cute boy in pink

I couldn’t believe he hadn’t seen this before. They have Disney radio dance parties in the garage all the time and surely that song has come on.

Frozen was the first movie we took Big T to see in theaters, and the music has been playing on repeat his entire life. My husband wasn’t thrilled about our son’s talent for singing princess songs, but he was impressed. And with a song as epic as that, who can resist?

A few days later I was shopping for party supplies for my sister’s birthday party and we came across party hats. Our son LOVES hats. Any kind of hat or helmet, he’s a fan. Frilly hats that are PINK? Even better apparently, because that’s the one he wanted.


On clearance for $2 I picked it up, and he wore it through the store. He cried when I took it off so they could scan it at checkout.

When we rolled past the freezers he caught his reflection and grinned so big. Then I turned let him see himself in my phone and I caught the most adorable face.

I sent a text to my husband and he only had a one-word response…



We have a wide array of toys for both of our kids to share and don’t designate them as for boys or girls. Our son doesn’t like playing dolls with his sister. He’s not a fan of dress up (yet). He loves to breakdance and push trains and trucks through our house. And goodness by golly, he loves him some pink.

Does your child love pink?

Every summer when the pool opens the conversation I have with my husband goes something like this:

She Says: Look! I got us some new sunscreen.
He Says: Why?!! We have seven bottles already!
She Says: Well sorry. We can never have too many anyway.

Then we make trips to the pool, forget to put the sunscreen in the bag, or bring it but leave it at the pool. I buy more, rinse and repeat.

interracial marriage sunscreen

This year however, it went a little different. For once, I DIDN’T buy a new bottle of sunscreen before our first trip to the pool. And I went to my husband to find out where he was stashing it all.

She Says: Hey, we’re going to the pool, where is all the sunscreen?
He Says: I don’t know, on the closet shelf?

It wasn’t there.

She Says: Are you kidding me? The one year I don’t buy sunscreen and we don’t have ONE bottle?
He Says: Oh you guys will be fine, just don’t stay long!

I don’t know what he has against sunscreen it’s like he thinks he can’t burn. Or get skin cancer. I’m forever trying to lather him with the stuff when we’re at the pool, cause lawd knows his pasty butt needs it. … Not that I’m lathering his butt, but you know what I mean.

My daughter on the other hand thinks she is going to die if she doesn’t have sunscreen on. Our conversation this week went something like this.

Lil’ J: Where’s the sunscreen mom? We have to pack it.
Me: I’m texting daddy to see where he put it. I can’t find it.
Lil’ J: You CAN’T FIND IT? Oh no! But what is going to happen to me?
Me: You could get sunburned. I’ll find some, or buy more. Don’t worry.
Lil’ J: The sun will BURN me?

Sunscreen tips for multiracial families.

Sunscreen tips for multiracial families (and good habits for all families).

While searching for two bottles of sunscreen I knew I had personally purchased before, I tried to explain to my 4-year-old that her skin wasn’t going to burn up or melt off her bones.

After tearing through the bathrooms and closets I gave up and drove to the closest convenient store… Which wasn’t selling sunscreen yet (and of course I realized this just moments after lugging both kids inside).

A few snide texts later and my husband was coming home with more sunscreen and he met us at the pool.

“I’m so blogging about this,” I warned him.

Sunscreen tips for multiracial families (and good habits for all families).

I haven’t always been the most diligent about my sunscreen habits. But since marrying a white guy who although tans, totally needs it–And having biracial kids with lighter and more susceptible skin than mine, I’ve come up to speed on better habits.

Yes, even us darker ones can burn (although it can take longer to get to that point) and yes, we need sunscreen. I need to get better about keeping it around all year long and not just in the summer months, but you know… Baby steps.

Sunscreen tips for multiracial families (and good habits for all families).

Here in Texas we’re basically in full-blown summer swimming weather now so I’ll soon start stocking up again, no matter what my husband thinks. If you aren’t already I’d suggest you do the same! You don’t want to be all burnt up in pictures you look back on later.–Always reminding you of that terrible painful sunburn. Make beautiful memories in beautiful skin!

Here are some reminders to get you ready:

1. Apply 15 minutes before going outside, and make sure you cover all areas of the skin that will be exposed.
2. Re-apply every 2 hours or more if your child has been in the water.
3. Use sunscreen labeled “broad spectrum” — it means it protects against UVA and UVB radiation.
4. The sun can damage anyone’s skin. The American Academy of Dermatology recommends everyone of every ethnicity and race wear sunscreen.


You can find more sunscreen tips here.

Sunscreen tips for multiracial families (and good habits for all families).

My daughter is kind of obsessed with sunscreen and she won’t let us forget to put it on her when we go swimming. My son loves to be shirtless as much as possible, so I have to get him lathered up before her runs away. And my husband… Sometimes he’s my most difficult one.

Do you have sunscreen battles in your home? Or is it just us?

Visit Consumer Healthcare Products Association’s profile on Pinterest.

*This post is sponsored by KnowYourOTC, a nonprofit organization dedicated to the responsible use of consumer healthcare products. All opinions, arguments with my husband, and typos are my own.

I watch as my kids get ready to say go to bed, say goodbye, or whatever–and turn to give their daddy a kiss. They pucker up, lean in, and so does he, but right before their lips touch he turns his head to instead receive a kiss on the cheek.

Sometimes he’ll turn too soon and our son or daughter will turn as well, realigning for the lips. They’ll do a face tango until one of them finds victory.

He says/ she says: A husband/wife discussion about kissing on the lips.
She says (after watching in frustration):
Let the baby kiss you on the lips! Jeez!

He says: Huh?

She says: Why do you always turn your head, that’s not a real kiss!

He says: They don’t need to kiss me on the lips. That’s weird.

She says: No it’s not! They kiss me on the lips, and each other! Don’t psyche them out like that!

He says: They kiss each other on the lips? They don’t need to do that.

She says: Oh my gosh, really? It’s cute. Let’s just enjoy it while it lasts.

He says/ she says: A husband/wife discussion about kissing on the lips.

I watched him later as he let our kids lay one right smack dab on the lips. He tried to hold out, but couldn’t wait to wipe it off. I decided to let that slide, and get into that back and forth conversation another day.

But I know it’s only a matter of time until they don’t want to kiss us on the lips, or give us hugs, or be seen with us in public (oh please, never let that day come!).

Do you kiss your child on the lips?

I was raised by lip-kissers, so it’s no big deal to me. My dad didn’t like the lip action from us either, but we didn’t mind. And kisses from my babies are some of the sweetest gifts they give me. I can’t imagine turning away or wiping them off… Unless it was a snot-faced kiss, but I’d at least wait until they weren’t looking before rubbing it away.

What say you? Are you lip kissers at your house? Or are you not a fan of kissing on the lips?

She Says: I’ve been too busy with work to plan this party for this weekend. I’m just going to order a cake from the grocery store and call it a day.
He says: That’s cool.
She says: I wish they had regular trains and not just Thomas but whatever.
He says: Yea, that’s fine, he thinks everything is a train anyway.First birthday party

She says: What flavor should I get?
He says: What are the options?
She says: Chocolate, white, marble, yellow, strawberry or half chocolate half white.
He says: What’s his favorite?
She says: I’m not sure, chocolate or vanilla… I’ll get half chocolate half white.
He says: Cool, just like him.

I didn’t want to… But I laughed.

Hi! I’m Jennifer Borget


I'm a part-time journalist, full-time wife and mother striving to make the world a better place and inspiring others to do the same. This is the space where I share my journey in making the most of every day.

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