Isn’t it funny how in the moment we feel like we look one way, then later when we see a photo or replay we realize we looked totally different?

That was the case for me when I performed a hip hop dance I had been practicing for the good portion of a year with an adult (beginner, mind you) hip hop class.

I joined when couple of friends of mine and I decided we wanted to get out of the house and try something new.

“Wouldn’t it be fun to dance like that?” We said as we watched a viral Facebook video of an older woman hip hop dancing like nobody’s business.

We signed up to take a class at a local dance studio. By the end of the summer I was the last one standing, not for talents sake (goodness, no) but because I wasn’t moving or pregnant.

I decided to stay with it because it has been a fun way to get out, get some exercise, and commit to something I’d been wanting to try. My kids saw me practicing, and I wanted them to see me doing something I enjoyed. Over the months other women came and went, but a few stayed committed through the year.

This summer all my hard work paid off–Or in other words, came to a humiliating climax, when I performed on stage at the recital. I’m pretty sure we were between a 7-year-old class tap number and a 3-year-old ballet class. Yes, between tiny tap shoes, tutus and frills I went out in red spandex (which my husband calls an 80s mistake) and flannel around my waist (which my husband calls a Canadian mistake) and performed a Willdabeast choreographed dance to Beyonce’s Get Me Bodied.

My son watched in awe. My daughter yelled for me at the top of her lungs. I was a cool mom.

The crowd cheered. And many I’m sure laughed. I took a chance and peeked at the audience and almost busted up laughing myself.

Want to see? Here you go:

Alright, so that wasn’t us, but we looked just as good. Just pretend. Because in my mind, that’s how I looked when I was dancing on stage.

When I got the DVD of our actual performance last week however, I realized I looked nothing like I felt. And that’s why, although I had planned to maybe upload it to YouTube and share on my blog, I’ve chickened out.

I will, however, leave you with a still dorky action photo that captures the coolness I felt that didn’t quite translate on camera.

Be this a lesson to my children. Kids, I love you, and I’ve learned something through this experience. Dance like nobody’s watching. Have fun! Make beautiful memories of the experience. And though I will be on the sidelines recording your every move… If you don’t want to show it to you’re friend’s later. I’m totally ok with that.

Tags: 30x30, bucket list, cool mom, dancing