My thoughts today…

Written 10/18 but saved for today.

Three days past my BFPs I’ve begun to worry about other things.

In my journey toward motherhood now, I’ve come to know many women who have struggled with infertility. For reasons I won’t get into here I worried about that for a little while too.

I know we all wonder at some point “when will it be my turn?” No matter if it’s been one month, 24 months, or even before you start TTC, I KNOW we’ve all wondered. It’s natural.

I did what I could to counter the problem I thought we’d experience and so far, it’s worked out for the good.

The battle I’m facing now, is my fear of telling some of my friends. I know by the time I publish this I will have already told you that I’m pregnant. Well today… Weeks before I’m planning to announce it, I’m here wondering how some of my TTC friends will feel, more specifically, my friends facing infertility.

I know everyone has been rooting for me. Over the months people’s comments have ranged from “Just do it already” to “It may take longer than you think.” The “may take longer” comments were the ones that stuck in my head the most, and made me start to plan for the worst.

I think my problem is I spend so much time worrying about what other people think… A quality I’m not very proud of. I genuinely want people to be happy, and knowing that my happiness may cause someone else sadness is a difficult predicament to be in.
I know how it is to feel jealous of a friend who has something you want… Especially something as noble as wanting a child. But I’ve tried to remember to be there for them because they’re not trying to make us sad by being happy… They’re just being happy.
A friend of mine recently told me through pregnancy you find out who your real friends are… Your pretend friends won’t be happy for you, they’ll disappear, or lash back, your real friends will be by your side. I guess now I’ll begin to see who my true friends are.
Taking a few weeks to let this pregnancy sink in, as well as get a handle over some of my fears of sharing the news I think is healthy for me. And I can’t wait to celebrate with my friends, and be happy!

Similar Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *