You know how when you’re looking so closely at something, you can get so absorbed in it and forget about the rest of the room? Sometimes you can be standing so close to a situation that you can’t remember what the big picture looks like.
I’ve had to take a step back and breathe for a moment as I try to gauge what’s happening in the world right now.
A week ago I finally heaved off a heavy weight I’d had sitting on my chest for months. I sat down and wrote everything I was feeling. It was like mental diarrhea. I just let it all out and onto a word document. Then I debated if I wanted to show it to anyone, who I wanted to read it, and wondered what kind of impact it would have. Because I feel like I’m living in an unusual paradox that allows me to feel deeply from multiple perspectives, I decided to share, hoping maybe it could give some more perspective to others I guess. So I sent it to the Huffington Post on a whim, and they published it on their Parents Blog the next day.
Since then, and unrelated to my confession of emotions, bad news just keeps coming. I can’t open up Facebook without being inundated with hatred and sadness. I know this anger comes from a place of frustration, and sometimes online feels like the only safe place to share it, but my mind can’t take much more poison. Life must go on. I can’t succumb to the sadness, I have two kids who just want to be kids and too much in life to enjoy and celebrate.
Sometimes you’ve got to step back and look at the big picture in order to gain perspective. Prepare for the worst but hope for the best–That’s generally how I’ve tried to do things. There is still so much good in the world. In my community, and in my home. Unfortunately I can’t shield our kids from the bad forever, but I can choose to highlight the good. It’s just that sometimes, being so close to the situation makes that harder to do.
Is it just me, or is the world coming apart?
Excuse me, my tone, it’s been one of those
weeks months. I’ll be chipper again tomorrow.
Featured image via.