I’m ready to be done breastfeeding… Forever
I’m very proud of myself for having breastfed my daughter for 17 months, and my son at this point has been nursing for 15.
Part of me is sad to be nearing the end of this motherhood experience, but a greater part of me is feelin’ all “see ya!”
Photo by Rebecca Loren Photography.
The benefits are great. My children get nourishment and comfort, I burn calories (allegedly) and a get a lower risk of breast cancer. Win-win. But let’s just be honest, there are some downsides that come with breastfeeding too.
Here are three reasons I’m excited the end is near:
1. I think it’ll help me shed some weight. I know for most women the extra calories they burn while breastfeeding helps them drop the weight. For me it seems to have the opposite effect. I go UP in pants sizes not during pregnancy, but after giving birth. Once I finally gave in and bought larger sizes after my daughter, it was about the time we stopped nursing and 6 months later all of the extra fat in my hips, and butt were gone.
I’ve been working out almost daily for several months and doing better at resisting sweets, (still loving on the fries though) and I haven’t lost a pound. I have a feeling my baby’s addiction to the tap is partly to blame.
2. Biting. My son has the most beautiful smile, and adorable teeth, but I am not happy when he decides to show them off while latched on. My nipples can’t take it much longer.
3. Leakage. Lately I’ve been getting pitches from different panty-liner and adult diaper companies, and I’m wondering what about my blog screams incontinence. I don’t have bladder leaking problem at this point in my life, however, the leaking due to breastfeeding still happens to catch me at the most inopportune times.
It’s not so bad now that my son is nursing less. But on some days, when I take on an extra long shift at work and forget my boob pads. Things get ugly.
Like one day, it was a Sunday morning when I was still full-time at my station. I was finishing up my morning anchoring shift. Since it’s a 24-hour news station, I’ll record a bunch of stories at one time then they’ll play throughout the day. Well, between stories it got quiet. All of the people who normally talk in my ear stopped talking, and my director came over to have a chat with me. This was unusual.
I could sense something was up but didn’t know what. She came over and whispered what was probably more embarrassing for her than it was for me.
“Umm. I think you have a lactation spot on your shirt.”
“A what? OH!”
I looked down and confirmed.
“Oops, I leaked!”
I had a feeling it would happen at some point, but I’m usually really good about remembering nursing pads. Unfortunately one got away from me, shifted, and resulted in this.
I think if this had been my first child I may have been horrified. But since it was with my second, I understand milk stains just come with the territory.
(Notice the careful placement of my right arm.)
Unfortunately I had to spend the rest of my shift with my dress shifted a little and my right arm awkwardly positioned over my chest, but I guess it could have been worse.
I can laugh about it now and imagine my experience could make a good greeting card to a nursing mom in need of a good chuckle.
“In middle school we inconspicuously stuffed our bras with tissue. Who knew we’d be doing it again as adults for an entirely different reason?”
What do you think Hallmark? Am I hired?
Didn’t think so.
Here are a few other shoebox cards to make you smile:
If I ever meet Beyonce I’ll give her this appropriate card:
Being an adult changes things doesn’t it? Like your thoughts about boobs. I’m ready to have mine back.
I’m partnering with Hallmark to share some of my life’s special moments and occasions. Some of the products featured in this post we selected, courtesy of Hallmark. All opinions are my own. You can find out more silly Shoebox greetings for the ones you love (or like a lot) by visiting Hallmark.com.
Tags: breastfeeding, funny, hallmark, humor, nursing, shoebox
I hear ya on the not losing weight while breastfeeding. I don’t lose a pound until I stop and its super annoying. Makes me want to stalk all those websites that say that you will and put in a modifier.
Haha, that’s pretty much exactly how I feel! Glad I’m not in it alone, or crazy! I’m all for encouraging mothers to breastfeed but our bodies aren’t all the same. (Also, perhaps it could have to do with my intense cravings while breastfeeding?)
I’ve never cared for it, and will certainly not miss it when I’m done having kids. While in labor I wasn’t even thinking about the “labor” portion–I just kept thinking, “Crap, when he comes out I have to start breastfeeding”.
Breast feeding is SO hard! Especially if you work! Oh my heavens. I commend you for keeping at it for so long. Nursing has been probably the hardest part about being a mom FOR ME.(Everything else pretty much rocks!)
Sometimes I wish I could just hand over my boob to James and let him deal with it. The good thing is that Olivia drinks bottles (of Breast Milk) so he can feed her while Im away, but still!
When I first started I had mad cravings, but those subdued over time. I think the majority of people loose a good portion while breast feeding, but don’t loose the rest until they stop! Your body holds onto that fat as a way of survival just in case something were to happen you’ve got a little extra for you both. Or I think thats what I read? I personally think you look great-but of course you gotta do what’s going to make YOU feel good. Just remember no one is as hard on you as you are.
Let me share what happened to me. When I was nursing my oldest daughter I suffered from an over abundance of milk. When I leaked, I really leaked. Breast pads were too thin and I had to use sanitary napkins as breast pads. Well, one day I decided that I could go without pads….silly, I know. So, as I was in FRONT of my classroom full of 6th grade science students, I felt the sign that I was going to leak. I looked down and saw a very small spot. Moments later, I heard the students beginning to giggle, looked down, and realized the small spot was now almost the entire bodice of my dress. I couldn’t ignore it, so I said to my students, “I guess someone’s hungry.” They all laughed. I had to laugh too. 15 minutes later, my teaching day was done, and I rushed out as fast as I could. By then, the entire front of my dress was soaking wet, down to the hem. Live and Learn.
Too funny, even though it’s not. I have had way too many of those situations actually…not on air tho’.
I agree about the weight thing. Nursing does help burn calories, but it’s burning calories of food I wouldn’t even eat if I wasn’t nursing in the first place. At 9 months, I have some months to go, BUT, I too will be done forever-when I am done with this kid.
The biting is another story- although when my son used to bite I would pinch his thigh slightly, and HE JUST KNEW what and why I was doing that. Eventually he bit me so bad that I got an infection and the Dr. said no more nursing- lifted a huge weight off my shoulders.
I hope your journey will be easy BUT I know you being the kind of mommy you are, will miss the cuddle time too 🙁
…BTW I love your new profile pic 🙂
YES! I shed the weight like *that* with my first, but with Jack, I cannot lose a damn pound while nursing! Like, seriously, I had a stomach bug and threw up and lost six pounds in 36 hours, and within twenty-four hours of feeling better and being able to keep down water, I had GAINED IT ALL BACK. I had heard about this happening before to some other moms, but physiologically I couldn’t believe it. I believe it now!
Five weeks ago during a 3 am feeding I decided I had given all I had to hive and stopped Breastfeeding the next day! I had surpassed my goal of one year and am very proud of myself! My son got 6 teeth within a month and I just couldn’t handle the gnawing feeling! I got my boobies back!!!!
Pretty! This was an extremely wonderful post. Thanks
for supplying this info.
I’m not ready to end breast feeding yet. My son is 6.5 months though. And no teeth yet. We’ll see how I feel when he’s a year old!