How Do You Blog and Not Neglect Your Kids?
I pulled out my laptop today for the first time in… Oh I don’t know… Three or four days. Not that it’s a big deal or anything for a normal person to not blog or tweet for several days… But for me it’s a bigger deal than I thought.
Sunday night I made a list of things I’d blog about that night, and the following week. I have a list of things on my mind and giveaways I need to post. In order to not get “behind” I’d need to post daily.
I felt a little anxious after the first night when I didn’t meet my goal. I didn’t even reach for my laptop that night to write a post. Instead I watched Big Love with my husband and started a new book (The Boleyn Inheritance).
But the more I pondered why my lack of internet time was bugging me so much, the more I realized how sorta insane it was.
Gone are the days where I’d post a paragraph or two, or a simple photo… I’d do that when I felt like that was all that was on my mind, but it was still enough for my daily journal update. …That’s what this was. My journal update. But somehow, somewhere, I got sucked into some sort of blogging, competitive phenomenon where I feel bad if I’m not posting get this… “content” often enough.
No no no… We must nip this in the bud (or nip it in the butt as I use to mistake the saying for)! I don’t want my blog to turn into a stress for me. This is a fun hobby, a journal for me to relieve my inner thoughts on being a mom. This isn’t a job. I already have a job, I don’t need two. Plus, with a baby on the way, I’m asking myself HOW IN THE WORLD do women do it? I don’t want to miss out on LIVING my life because I’m blogging about it, and sometimes I think there’s a fine line, and I wonder with a new baby, if that can happen.
I don’t want to start a huge debate but I hear a lot of women say how hard being a mom is… Especially hear about it from stay at home moms. I read about it a lot. And from the sounds of all of the “Mommy Needs a (insert alcoholic drink here)” blogs it can be wearing to be at home with kids all day. I can see how having a blog as a place to vent can be nice, but what I’m wondering is if it’s so time consuming… How DO you have time to blog?
I ask honestly because I’m becoming a mom myself in 6 months and for the first three official months of motherhood I’ll be at home. I picture my blog going dark… Offline… Out of commission, whatever you want to call it because in my head I have envisioned that my baby will be crying/screaming/pooping/eating 24/7 (partly thanks to some of the blogs I read) and having me reaching for some (insert alcoholic drink here), which would be quite interesting actually since I haven’t drank a day in my life.
I know the toll blogging can take on a couple. Since getting my iPhone I have constant access to reading blogs in my reader, tweeting, replying to emails… All the while my “auto me” is responding to my husband. During our evenings together I’m required to surrender my phone to him… Or keep it in another room. I don’t mind though, we need that real alone time together.
I’ve asked bloggers and tweeters before how they do it with children and they jokingly say “neglect” but I wonder if there’s some truth to that. I mean really… These are women with big HUGE blogs and little children. I’m assuming they mean they use this technique when their child is a little older and can maybe sit in front of the TV awhile while you blog away in the other room and pray it’s not the case with a screaming toddler in the background.
But really, how do moms find time to be online so much? Especially moms who do reviews and giveaways all of the time and make it their business? That’s time consuming! I’m sure I’ll figure out a balance in this enjoyment and motherhood eventually and that it’ll take practice and experience, but it’s sometimes really hard for me to squeeze the time in after work and spending time with my husband. Adding a baby into the equation makes me wonder if I’ll have to set his hobby aside indefinitely.
I didn’t have a blog when my daughter was a baby. OK for me she is still a baby, but a big one at almost 5.
I started my blog in Sep. of 2008 and my kiddo was 3 and a half. At first I blogged just for fun…you know post here and there, comment a little, don’t do it for days.
Than as more friends I made trough the blog world more I started posting.
I use to blog in the morning after breakfast when my daughter would watch a 30 min video 🙂 now I do it when she goes to sleep. Like from 10 pm to 1 pm…
As older kiddos get the easier things are. I find it not so stressful to be home with my child, because it’s not that hard…I don’t know with more than one kid is more though (which is understandable). It’s also much easier now than when she was a baby, or a toddler who just started exploring and getting into everything.
Honestly even though I do lots of things on my blog (reviews, giveaways this and that) I never let it become a job, a must something that I need to do. I do it for fun, both mine and other moms 😉 I love that people read it and like it and come back 🙂
You’ll see, beginning is the toughest especially for first time moms. When you set up a good routine both for you and your baby, everything will go well, and you’ll find time for things you love and for your family 🙂
I blog at work. Shhh! I also blog at night once the kids go to bed and schedule posts for later. I keep post-it notes and notes in my phone for future blog posts. Sometimes, the blog gets neglected. Sometimes, Twitter and Facebook get neglected. I don’t think I neglect my husband or kids in any way. I do these things during me time.
My blog certainly is not as successful as yours, so if I were to stop posting, I doubt many people would notice, LOL. I started blogging when my daughter was about 8 months. She was a horribly fussy, colicky infant, so I doubt I would have been able to blog when she was smaller. She was still very fussy and demanding when I started my blog, but she did nap moderately well, and that is when I would choose to blog.
She is now 13 months and somewhat more independent (depending on the day!). I try to give her some time to play with her toys by herself (with me in the room watching to make sure she’s safe of course), so I will sometimes blog while she plays. She also goes to bed very early (like 6:30-7:00 pm) so I have a good portion of the evenings to myself, perfect for blogging!
You can also write your posts ahead of time and schedule them to publish at certain times, which could be a handy tool, assuming you have the time to write multiple blog posts and save them.
That is a good question! I have always wondered where mom’s get the time to blog!
Have a great day!
Great Post! I am feeling the same way on a lot of things. we had our baby last week and I have so much to say, but no time. Naturally, I would prefer to spend every waking moment with my son and have had little time to blog. I think like everything else, we bloggers must find balance. Blogging should be a fun outlet and not a venue to replace other things in our lives.
I used to think they were super moms. now I think they are neglectful moms. I only blog during naps or bedtime.
When it was just my daughter and I at home before our newest addition arrive on Halloween, I’d blog with her in my lap while she watched The Imagination movers on you tube. Smaller windows do wonders. Now since I have a 2 month old and my 21 month old, I read and comment (like now) during naptime, and also do a quick mini sweep clean up around the living room, and I blog after all 3 kids are in bed at night. It gives me quiet time and time to relax to blog at night after the kids are in bed. It’s pretty quiet at naptime too, but there’s so much to do around the house that I usually only have about 15-20 minutes before my daughter is up from her nap at the end of it all, which rouses the baby, which leads to crying and me nursing, where I remain until my son gets home from school and I need to start dishes, homework help and prepping dinner.
I have noticed that most of those mom’s that blog and do giveaway’s and such are stay at home moms.
I work full time and have a 4 month old, so I do my blogging at work as well.
When my daughter was fresh from the womb, she slept like 19 hrs a day and i was able to blog ALL day. Once she started waking up more, my blogging fell off big time. I’m just not getting back into it, but its not like it was. You have to set schedules and limits. I used to be online reading and writing blogs for 6 hrs at a time. Now, I have to schedule it in my day. Sometimes I do it first thing in the morning before I get too busy, or whenever baby is napping. Ands its definitely not no 6 hrs. more like 15 mins here, 30 mins there. youll find a balance. And your readers will understand your new priorities, so they won’t hate you for skipping days.
I think you need to remember that the most important people in the world are your family and you don’t owe anyone else anything. Your true friends always stand by you (and read your blog) and if you have a lapse in blogging, it’s okay. But just because you blog, it doesn’t mean you should own some guilt because you have done something that you enjoy and feel like you’re a neglectful parent. Moms need to have something to fill their cup, too. Kids also give you wonderful moments to brag – I mean blog about. You don’t totally lose your identity when you become a mom – it just seems like it sometimes.
First of all, don’t have too many expectations of yourself! You will be learning ow to do the most important, difficult, time-consuming job of your life. It WILL take an adjustment period to even figure out how to find time to eat or shower yourself.
I had Jordan in February and didn’t bother to start blogging until August. Even still, it’s hard to find time some days.
I have started getting up early to get in my workout AND time to update my blog and hopefully read some others. Some days it works beautifully. Some days the kids wake up an hour too early and I’m screwed! Just roll with it.
Don’t worry about “content” for other people. it’s YOUR blog!!!! Just toss us a couple new baby photos once ro twice a week and a few words about ow everyone’s doing and that will be plenty til you feel like doing more!
You won’t be sad about missing your blog’s baby moments, but you’ll really regret it if you miss your kid’s because you were online!
I honestly don’t know how they ones that are huge blogs with little kids do it. I have a 5 and 3 year old and one one the way. And I do have a feeling that my blog may take a little back seat for a while… but really new babies sleep sooo much, that you will have time to write something. What you might not have time for is reading the other blogs you want.
I write down ideas I want to blog about when the come, and then during nap time, or when they are watching a show, I write several blog entries at once and then just schedule them to post one a day.
I blog and tweet while she is asleep or playing by herself. I also am online while she eats or sits with me, althoguh right now she wants to push the keys!
It’s all about moderation and about the personality of your child. I didn’t start twittering until recently though, so I can’t really tell you about the first couple months.
You’ll be a wonderful mom blogger. I’m sure you will figure out what works for you 🙂
For me I throw out a post whilst I am working (I work from home) or when my two are asleep. I find that I tend to start a post with notes about what I want to say and hen come back to it a few days later!
I blogged through my pregnancy and wasn’t sure I would handle it either. The first month was great. Elijah slept, ate and pooped. So I fed him, I changed him, I napped often and I blogged. He sat next to me in his seat and we interacted while he was awake. I took photos and blogged what he was up to. …I was spoiled. lol As the months went by and he interacted more and more, my blogging got less and less. It was very hard to balance out blogging vs baby. But after a few months I just came to realization that when Elijah was awake he had to be my #1 priority and that while he sleeps is my time. Yes, my blog did suffer, but it wasn’t too much. The best way to combat that is to write quick updates on what you and baby are up to. That way people still are coming back day after day to see what you are up to. As soon as Elijah could crawl I also had some free time during the day as he learned to play by himself. I was sit in his playroom and blog while he played.
These days (Elijah is 15 months) our schedule looks mostly like this: About 10am Wake up. Breakfast. Go to playroom. I play with Elijah for 1-2 hours. Then he plays by himself for 1 or 2 hours more. I usually do laundry, clean, sew or play on the computer then.His play area is a fenced off side of our home office. He usually lets me know when he is ready for lunch then (He talks now but has signed since about 5 months.) We eat and then he goes to nap. About 4 to 5 hours after he gets up in the morning he is usually ready for nap so between 2 and 3pm. Depending on the day I either nap too or blog. He sleeps anywhere from 1 to 3 hours. When he wakes up he is usually hungry for a snack, so we eat a snack and watch 30 minutes of tv. We dont have cable, just shows on dvd, so it’s easy to control what and how long he watches. We then go back to the playroom and play together for about 2 more hours before we go to the kitchen. He plays in his playpen or highchair while I make dinner. We usually go up around 7 and eat around 8. Then he plays again while I clean up the kitchen. He gets 1 or 2 more hours of play after dinner and then we do reading time, snack, bath time and bed. He sleeps for about 10 hours a night now, going to bed at midnight because of his dad’s work schedule. That’s why we eat dinner later too. Otherwise he wouldn’t get to play with Dave at all. If Dave is playing with him after dinner I blog then but mostly I wait until I put Elijah to bed. It’s getting easier and easier because he is wanting to play alone more and more.
Thats our long story short. Occasionally, and by occasionally I mean once every 2 months, Dave’s parents will take Elijah for day. Other than that we don’t have anybody else to watch him, so it does get tough missing that blogging time and certainly my alone time!
I think it all depends on your child but you will figure out what your schedule is and what works for it. It just takes a little time! 🙂
Sorry that was probably way too long of a comment. lol
I am a stay at home mom (have been for almost 5 years) and have three children, ages almost 5, 3, and a 3 month old. I blog/facebook when the older two are playing or napping and I’m nursing the baby. Really, if it’s something you want to do, you will find time and schedule it. Everything becomes a “schedule” after having kids! It’s not hard, and I’m not neglecting my family at all. If I don’t take 30 mins a day to have “Amanda” time, then I can’t be the best Mommy to my kids. Just because you become a mother doesn’t mean you lose yourself (or your time) completely! It’s a struggle to find the balance, but once you get into a routine, it’s not something you really put much thought into ~ it just happens like the rest of your day 😉
Like right now, for example, my hubs is off work so he is snuggling the two older ones while watching Tinkerbell and I’m nursing the hippo (gotta love a boppy!) Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy and delivery! I look forward to reading your Mommy blogs 😉
I am a SAHM who is turning into a WAHM right now, slowly but surely. While my children run me ragged, I have found a healthy medium to have blogging time, email time, twitter time, article writing time, and things that *I* need to get do for me.
What I have done is set my computer up in our playroom. So while the kids are playing, watching a DVD or whatever else they do, I can write, and watch them at the same time. My youngest is still in the phase where he naps 3-4 times a day, so I get that time to be one on one with my oldest, who is more into independent play than anything. I guess all in all, I am super lucky that my kids cooperate with me for this time.
No, not all kids are as easy going.
In the first couple weeks after both were born, the computer was the last thing on my mind though.
You know, I always thought it was nip in the butt too. Ha, thanks for clarification.
But I just blog when I can. Mostly at night or during nap times. I keep a different journal by my bed and use that for more personal stuff. But you can either neglect (which I have done before) or do it when they are in bed. I’ve found my day to be so much more productive when I set time aside later at night for blogging and email. I have over 40 unread blogs on my reader and tons of emails, but it’s worth it. When my kids see me playing with them and doing stuff with them they are just better overall. That’s my two cents.
I was thinking the same thing the other day. But I guess the post I posted on my own blog today does not apply to this debate. Although I am not a mother yet I am already worrying about PPD, but what I should start thinking about is how to cope will my obsession of blogging. These days, like many of you, if I don’t take my laptop to send a post or browse the net I start to worry. The last post before today’s was four days ago but in the mean time I had to read many moms blogs to keep me going.
It was becoming so bad that my hubby asked me to spend time together without our laptops, but here I am commenting on BabyMakinMachine.
How do you define this? MAB (modern addicted Blogger)?
What I expect from myself is to blog less when I have the baby, but right now although I should blog less and focus more on university assignments I am constantly blogging.
I can’t wait to hear all the answers b/c I have wondered the same thing myself. I didn’t start my blog until my girls were 1 and 3. I can’t imagine blogging when sleep deprived, but I know plenty that have done it. I only post 2-3 times per week and blog during naptime and after bedtime…mostly. My blog is a writing exercise for me. The social is icing on the cake, but I spend a lot of time outside in the “real world”…I am President of our local MOMS Club, so I don’t have a lot of time.. I make it a priority to make sure my blog is not a….well….a priority. Looking forward to hearing the other answers, though! Sorry I couldn’t give more advice!
Naptime and bedtime are the times I get to be online most with my 7.5 month old. Oddly enough, when he was younger and I was pumping exclusively (latch issues, long story), I played around online– blogging, facebook, twitter, what have you– while I pumped. Those hands free bras are great for that (or you can make your own with an old sports bra and a pair of scissors!). Your readers will understand when the time comes for you to step away for a day or two, I promise 🙂
You know sometimes during the day you just have to have a break. Sometimes a blog is a stay at home moms only way to vent and not go crazy. Right now it is nap time so I try to check the facebook, e-mail and blog during that time. I randomly will check is through out the day also while he is playing or coloring. I don’t necessarily think the mothers with big blogs are neglecting their children. Lets give them the benefit of the doubt! We all have to find a little “me” time during the crazy schedules we all have.
I think there may be some truth to that for some moms, but mostly they just work at it when the rest of us are um, playing video games, or whatever. I get up at 5 am and spend the first 2 hours of my day in prayer, entering giveaways, and sometimes blogging. Then at naptime and free time, I’m back on the net, doing what I did in the morning before they got up. Then at bedtime, after all my housework is done and my husband is, er, taken care of (if he’s needy, you know) I get back on the computer again. Sometimes I play games, but mostly I enter giveaways.
I imagine successful blogging moms just do the same thing I do. They just really devote their extra time to blogging and related things. They are driven, that’s for sure. For the most part, though, I doubt they neglect their kids.
So, I absolutely do NOT neglect my kids. When I don’t have time to blog, I don’t. The end.
But sometimes kids sleep, and sometimes kids play on their own, and eventually they go to school. I don’t blog for numbers, for comments, for validation. I blog because I want to be a writer and I find it helps to keep story ideas flowing if I’m constantly writing… even if the words I blog aren’t necessarily related to my actual serious writing pursuits. It’s important to me, so I find time to do it after hours, when kids are all in bed, or during the rare moments during the day when they are playing on their own.
I’m not sure I would have blogged when I had my first baby… but I’m a little better at now, so when my fourth was born, I was blogging again within a couple of weeks.
But seriously… don’t feel obligated to post if you don’t have time. Sometimes my blog sits idle for weeks, just cause too much is going on for me to pay it any attention.
I blog (not even close to as popular as yours) when I am at work (shhhh! don’t tell), or in the evenings after bedtime or during naptime on the weekends. It’s my “down” time, so I’m not neglecting at all.
There wasn’t such a thing as a ‘blog’ when my two were little, mid 70’s, but there were still letters to write home to keep everyone up to date on our lives and I always did them while my little ones were napping.
well, here are a few thoughts on my blogging habits post-baby…
he was a really GOOD baby… i can’t count many days that i was feeding/changing/soothing the ENTIRE day. bitty babies sleep… a loooooooott. i was surprised at how much “free” time i had when he was a newborn. i think people get caught up in the fact that you’re just not actually getting out of the house or doing something other than clean, shower, cook, etc.
now that he’s older i use his nap times or times when he is playing but doesn’t really want much to do with me (it happens… something else you don’t hear a lot haha). and, honestly… he goes to bed around 8pm. sometimes sooner than that. and i don’t even think about crawling into bed until… what? maybe 10? so that’s a good couple of hours, too. hubby and i spend time often on our computers together but we also make the time to turn them off and watch tv or eat together, etc.
don’t worry… i think you will really find that you have more time on your hands to keep your “me” time intact than people lead you to believe. mom blogs can be VERYYYY negative. one reason i’m edging my way out — whoops!
The first 3 months are the hardest – I didnt get online once.
After that it calms down and u can blog/internet/read – whatever whilst they nap.
Housework seems more manageable.
But I’m not sure about working as well, I am a SAHM and luckily my hubby has earned enough to enable for me to stay at home as long as I like with our 14 month old.
I guess its all about time management and being super-organised.
With time things get easier, I doubt that you will have time to blog for the first few weeks at least.
Best of luck
I don’t have kids, so I can’t answer your question….but I just wanted to comment about your statement that you surrender your phone so you and your hubby can have personal time.
I think that is an awesome idea and my husband and I totally need to do it. We’re addicted to our phones. We’ll watch TV at night and during the commercials check and re-check our Facebook apps. It’s so pathetic!
I wonder if my husband will go for this idea…
I have 3 sons, ages 8, almost 6 and 2 1/2 months. I don’t blog unless they’re at school and the newborn’s sleeping because they are my priority.
I too think that if you blog while your kids are in need of your time then it’s a bit neglectful.
It’s all about prioritizing. If blogging is someone’s professional job then set aside time to blog that won’t interfere with time spent with the kiddies.
Of course being a mom is a non stop job but blogging during naps or while the kids are at school is usually the best option. Well, for me at least. 🙂
Oh! Congrats on your little bun in the oven. 🙂
I completely see where you are coming from. At some point it feels like a “competition” or that you have to post fresh, new content often but when it comes down to it my blog is for me. I enjoy blogging, I enjoy sharing, and more than anything else I enjoy the connections I make with the other women I meet through blogging. I realize with working full-time now some weeks I may only post once, this week I posted Monday morning and tonight. I fit into my schedule and try not to stress about it. Twitter is much easier for me because my Twitter app for my phone is fabulous so I tweet while I am waiting, waiting in the doctor office, waiting for my children to be dismissed from school. Right now hubby and my son are at Cub Scouts, one of my girls is sleeping, and my middle daughter asked to play DS, so it is my “me time.”
Well. I don’t neglect my kids and I don’t think it’s fair to assume that other mommy bloggers neglect their kids. There are many ways to make time to blog. Personally, I wake up 1.5 hours earlier than my kids so I have time to check out my Google Reader and respond to emails, etc. When my kids get up, I rarely have time to get on the computer at all. Maybe 5 minutes here and there while they’re occupied but that’s it. Whenever I have an idea for a post, I will start a draft and jot down the jist of what I wanted to blog about. I have a blog routine that works for me and has worked for me for well over a year now. My oldest has karate one night a week at a local rec center. My husband takes the other two to the indoor playground while the karate class is going on and they all go out for ice cream after class. That gives me 1.5 hours of alone time. I go back and finish all the drafts that I started that week and schedule them to post one a day until they run out. Sometimes I end up with 20 posts scheduled and a handful of drafts waiting to be finished.
It’s all about multi-tasking and time management. I have four kids, it can be done without neglecting anyone.
Naptime! Seriously, even when you have a fussy baby, they still are sleeping a lot–especially those first few months. Here’s an example of my typical day’s schedule with a 8-month-old baby and a 3-year old:
We wake up somewhere between 7-8 am, whenever the kids wake up for the most part. 3 days a week, I go to the gym in the mornings while Eric hangs out with the kids. He goes up to campus at 9 am.
Morning: Breakfast, showers, get dressed, brush teeth, play with toys. I usually check my email but I try to stay off the computer when the kids are up and playing.
Dio takes a morning nap around 10 am. After this, we might go out on a walk, go to the library or post office or bank. Or we might just stay home and play.
After lunch, Dio takes another nap, usually 1 1/2 hours or 2 hours long. I just started keeping Zari up all day because I found that if she napped, she was impossible to get to bed at night. So we play together, read books, do crafting activities, clean, cook, etc. I’ve decided that since she isn’t taking afternoon naps anymore, she gets “quiet play time” during what used to be her nap time. This means she stays in her room and can play with toys or read books–whatever she wants, but she has to be in her room. This gives me a bit of a break (internet time, reading, sewing my slings, etc) while Dio’s napping.
Eric’s home around 4 or 5 most days. We eat dinner around 5-6 pm. Then we play together until the kids go to bed at 7 pm. We have evenings to ourselves, for the most part. Often we’re reading or working on the computer. Sometimes we watch movies together.
So even with two young kids, there’s still down time during the day, and especially in the evenings.
Great post! Definitely something I have been thinking about seeing how I will be a first-time mom in June. I don’t want to neglect my child, but I do hope to find time for blogging very once and awhile!
I blog when my kids are sleeping but I will admit that since my readership has started increasing and I’ve “met” other bloggers who I am inclined to read and comment on, it’s become a bit of an obsession and I sneak in a few minutes here and there when the kids are awake. I’ve posted on my blog before that the more connected I’ve become in “this” world, I fear becoming more disconnected from my real life world. I have an iPhone and check it more than I should in front of the kids. Sometimes while they are having lunch, I’ll open up my laptop to start a blog. I CRAVE “me time” in my day. I’m running running all day long with my kids and time for me is sparse so I need a fix when I can get it. But I have promised myself in the new year to live more in the moment with my little kids and enjoy the minutes with them since before I know it, they’ll be at school and I’ll miss them.
Bottom line: My blog is one more thing to balance in my life. My kids and husband will always come first but THIS is important to me too and I will fit it in where I can.
Umm…there is only slight neglect involved seriously while blogging with children. I have toddlers and it’s a fine line and tightrope act to balance it all. I hate them watching TV longer than an episode of a Dora or Diego video or something like that, so I try and put crafts out for them when I know I’m going to be doing my big blogging day. My husband takes over at night so that I can really get things accomplished online. But it’s only one day a week. Then I just say NO! And step away…and try to stay away until the next week when I post and comment again. You’ll find a groove. Or not. The world won’t end if any of us stop blogging to care for our families so don’t feel bad if you do, especially with a newborn.
My best, Lynn
I’ve always wondered this, too.
I don’t have a problem. I can quit blogging anytime I want to!!
Ok, maybe I see your point here. Look, I know Spawnie is going to take a lot of your time… just try to remember we were here first, ok? Don’t forget about your bloggy friends! 🙂
You know, that’s a good question..how do we moms have time for blogging? Well, I’m sick, both my kids are sick and it’s 12:14 a.m. and I’m going to be freakin’ tired in the morning but I am CHOOSING to blog, read your blog and respond to said blog at this time. Why, because it’s down time, it’s me time, it’s tune out time and that’s what I want to do right now. Do I feel guilty? Um, no. But I’ll probably be mad at myself in the morning and then I’ll do it all over again in a few days. On a more serious note: once that baby is in your arms, your priorities will change naturally. You may not care one tiny weenie bit that you don’t blog for a while because you have this amazing dependent blessing in your arms and as you and Spawnie re-enter into the real world then your thoughts may turn back to blogging, in which case, go for it. Just prioritize your time. Baby’s needs first then blog (at least until the baby is a bit older and more independent, then you’ll change your schedule and priorities all over again). Don’t worry, you’ll figure it out, if not with this kiddo, then the next or the one after that or maybe after that…who knows when, but you will.
My friends were asking the same thing to me. I explained to them that blogging is a kind of refreshing thing for me. When my baby was sleeping but I was too tired to do whatever I had to do (including sleeping ^_^), so I wrote a blog. It was relaxing for me. I love writing! When it was not finished, I just saved it as a draft. I could continue later on. During the day, when my baby is sleeping, my bigger daughter is at school and my husband is at work, I prefer to do blogging than cleaning (LOL…). We only need to know when to stop so that we don’t neglect anyone or any important thing.
Sometimes I wonder the SAME thing, but I also work from home so blogging is a release for me that I only get the luxury of doing every other day.
Being a work at home mom, time management is key to life. Basically, I run on 5-6 hours of sleep a night. I get up before my baby and work. Then I work during naptime, and when bedtime comes around, more working.
I do not watch TV other than a few shows here and there that I end up watching on Hulu late at night. I don’t have cable or miss it. I am not the type of person to just relax. If I have a few minutes to myself I clean, work, edit photos, or blog. I don’t veg, rest (until I sleep), or nap. But that’s the type of person I am. Always on the go. I’m going to assume that other wahm and blogging moms are the same way.
Since I work from home, there are days that I just give in and call someone to watch Emma so I can get a good 6 or 7 hours of work. It’s nice to have that break and not neglecting your children at all.
When it comes to twitter (which I’m not using much anymore) many moms use it from their cellphones because it’s quick and a blurb here or there is not neglecting your children. As long as you are not engrossed in your phone more than your child.
I would hope that other mom bloggers and wahms are using these same methods.
I don’t think you will be letting anyone down by blogging less. When your baby is born, he/she is going to sleep a lot. You will too, but you are going to have time that you will be able to blog more. As your child grows and gets older, blogging will be harder, BUT you will start to learn time management better. Your readers will understand. Post a blurb on your blog about focusing more time on your family and less time on your blog. I did that at the start of the new year. I didn’t lose any followers and they seem to be very understanding (despite some emails saying they miss me LOL).
The important thing is to focus on you and your family. Don’t let blogging take over your life. Let it be something that you just do.
Sorry for blogging in your blog. My kid is asleep right now LOL.
i just found you through SITS and was reading your post with big interest. I have two kids (preschoolers) and even thought that blogging is just a hobby I really have to stick to a time limit for blogging otherwise I get lost…so I give me about one hour a day because I found out that this work out to let the children play for themselves..and this way I still have some capacity to do other Things I love,like sewing etc. But I always try to involve the kids in my activities so that they can “spare” me for a while later. I also stick to an early bedtime ( 7.30) so I have “me” time in the evenings.
I get up at 5:30 in the morning. I do all my blogging and emails then take a shower before I wake everyone up for school. Then I usually wait until naptime to do any more blogging. And then there is the time after they go to bed.
Plus it’s harder when you are a new Mom because everything is new and you can barely take a shower, let alone think coherently and write stuff down.
Two words: Scheduled posts! I write several posts at once during naptime, then schedule them for a day or two apart through the coming week. I try to leave open days between them for if I want to blog something in the moment (something that just happened or whatever), but for my general topic posts (the ones that could go up anytime) I write ahead and schedule.
I also nurse at the keyboard. A lot. LOL!!!
My blog actually really only got going when I was home on maternity leave…it made me feel less alone. I’ve been sucked in now. For me, the key is to blog after she goes to bed (which is 8 p.m.). However, I tend to neglect things like housework…but something’s got to give.
I blog (very rarely lol) and twitter and run a business from my home. One of my kids is in full-time, one in half-time school and one in one-day a week daycare.
The rest of the time, including most weekend and evening time, it’s just me and them since Daddy works out of town. I have my computer on literally almost all day, but I don’t think I neglect my kids at all. They don’t watch cartoons all day – they play. It’s actually healthy and good for kids to play by themselves after all, they use their imaginations! I made playdough this morning and breakfast and snacks and did dishes. I tidy and play and read stories. And then I get on the computer and do a quick project here or there. Plus, like many others have said, I do a LOT at night after they go to bed! Oh, have to run, baby is up from his nap!
I’m going to be completely candid with you. I might get some backlash but its honest.
Motherhood is what you make it. If you thrive on constant drama and stress then I’m sure motherhood for you will be that.
But Motherhood (even with an infant who’s nursing constantly) can be calm and peaceful. I have been a mom for a year and half on the 1st (not counting gestation period) and I’ve loved every minute of it and have yet to run into that “Mommy needs a drink moment” more likely its “Wife needs a drink”
If you determine in your mind that you’re going to take motherhood in stride then you’ll be good. Don’t set yourself up for failure.
I think a lot of women THINK motherhood is supposed to be drama and stressful. I think it’s an automatic reflex to say “Ugh! I need a drink! OMG this is HARD” when if they really thought it about they would realize they put to much on classes, sign language, no tv, organic food, organic cotton clothes, and cleaning and they miss enjoying their kids. And if they sussed out
what was REALLY important they wouldn’t need 10 cups of coffee to get through their day.
Being a mom is not hard. Now before I get slammed, let me say that the task and duties of a mom isn’t hard. The hard part is knowing your in charge of making sure this life turns out good. But the diaper changing, laundry, feeding, burping, playing, dressing, etc can be managed and be fun.
Phew! So I said all of THAT to say you’ll find time. Babies nap. Babies also need independent play. So for the 15 minutes or so he/she is in the swing blog then.
I have a toddler so it is easier to blog now. But I also do a lot of blogging at night or I take a few minutes each day to bang out a little bit and finish it later.
Well, I am guessing that mine is not the blog you are referring to. I am not huge. I rarely do reviews anymore. And on occasion I have been known to just throw up a picture (I LOVE Wordless Wednesday because there is no guilty associated with having JUST a picture up). However, I will tell you that when Big Sister was little there were times when I sat with her in my lap and blogged and I do that occasionally with Little Sister too. Mostly though I tend to sit in a room with all three kids while they play and I read blogs or get on twitter. I usually write my own stuff at night after they are all in bed and asleep. The first few months of Big Sister’s life I did not write daily – some nights I was just to tired. But I do not think I neglect them. I feel like allowing them to play while I sit in the room on the computer is still being there for them. I am more than happy to put the computer down when one of them needs me – which is often. But like I said maybe you mean people with bigger blogs than mine. 🙂
The first three months of mommy hood are the hardest. Since I started my blog when I was preggo, I sort of felt obligated to post on a somewhat regular basis. But since I only had about seven readers I didnt feel to bad about skipping. 🙂 I would check in a couple times a week and post pictures of my baby and updates on what he was doing (smiling, laughing, sleeping a lot). He kind of took over my blog for a while. No one minded though. 🙂
Just dont stress yourself out about it. I have no time with a two year old running around to “neglect” him. He wont let me! Haha. So I usually blog during his nap time. I have been posting daily for a week or so, but I am not going to have time to get one up today. I started freaking, but realized that it is OK if I skip a day. It wont be the end of the world.
And if it is really bugging you, just do what I did during the first few months. Let your kid take over! None of us will mind seeing a cute little baby on your blog twice a week! 🙂
I blog (and FB) twice a day…first when my sons napping (that’s TWO joyous hours to do whatever I want!!) and then in the evening after he goes to bed at 7:30pm..I think that is PLENTY of time to take care of all of my selfish “computer-time” needs! I can shop, blog-hop, and get recipes for the next weeks dinners. LoL
Hoping to adopt again
How do you do it? Good Question…I love the ideas everyone had…and I don’t have time to do much commenting lately…but the main way I do it, is I don’t…I’m super inconsistent. I’m lucky if I get more than one a week in. 🙂 But I do it for me. BTW, You are lookin SUPER cute! Good Luck with finding the balance to it all.
Like the others have said when your child is a baby and you get a schedule/routine down you will find the time. As a baby my son slept most of the day and it was easy to clean, nap and find time for myself. Now that he is 2 it’s a little harder to find “me/computer time” but still doable. He usually takes a 2-4 hour nap in the afternoon so that’s when I do stuff around the house, work out and be on the computer. I am a stay at home mom and no, I don’t think it’s that hard at all. Yes, some days my son is impossibly exhausting but I have a great husband who takes over when he gets home. As a matter of fact he does the bed/bath routine so I have free time at night as well. You will learn to balance everything as time goes on and it’s important to make time for yourself and not feel guilty about it.
Oh man, I just loved that you wrote about this. I’ve been feeling the same way, and actually HAVE been neglecting my kids, and the house. I’ve only been blogging for about 3 months now, and it has become an obsession for me. My husband has brought this to my attention a couple of times, but I just reply really defensively, lol. I know he’s right, and am trying to set up a balanced schedule, where I focus on whats most important, and blog as a hobby and not competitively. I figure if I blog 3 times a week, that won’t require too much time, but will still keep things alive 🙂
It’s difficult. I have gone through spurts. At times, it’s the only thing that keeps you sane (especially if you stay at home and don’t get out often). At other times, it seems so silly you may go a week or two without any online interaction. Making a schedule is good. But don’t miss the moments with your new baby to blog….wait till they are sleeping, if possible. Because you’ll never get that time back. It goes so fast.
I try to keep up online while in the kitchen making dinner. It is sometimes a struggle between dinner, homework and entertaining the youngest member of the pack. This is probably I am up to the wee hours of the night.
I have been wondering this exact same thing all week!!!