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Archive for the ‘birth control’ Category

vasectomy-cartoon-blog

Via

So, um, I have a friend. And her husband is considering a vasectomy, but she’s not really cool with the idea and she believes they need to really think this through.

They only have two kids and although they are probably done there could possibly be one more baby down the road and they’re still pretty young. She thinks if she heard some really good botched vasectomy stories she may be able to give her husband more reason for pause.

Heard of any?

Thanks in advance… I mean, for my friend. She thanks you.

As I noted earlier, one of our cars was broken into earlier this week. We know it could happen anywhere but we’ve been wondering a little bit about out area for awhile now. We live in a nice neighborhood but in a “bad area.” Not bad like drive bys and what not… Just not the best area when it comes to crime and drugs apparently. <---Stressful fact #1 But like I said, our little neighborhood of townhomes is nice, and we got a good deal, so we’re debating a little. Our lease is up in November, so we don’t have a long time to decide. In fact, I think we have a few weeks. <--- Stressful fact #2. If you follow me on Twitter you may have seen my constant whining about my dead computer. Yes, my beautiful and wonderful Macbook Pro has sortof died. “Why didn’t you buy the extended warranty?” Well I did. And it expired three months ago… Figures. <---Stressful fact #3 So I haven’t had time to blog. Yes, I know it’s only been a day, but I was trying to do a double post thing while the fundraiser is going on. <---Stressful fact #4 I’m also not able to tweet as often, make anything with Photoshop, and I have to re-organize/ start over with the cutest baby/kid/pet contest! <---Stressful facts #5, 6 and 7. If you’ve emailed me and I haven’t responded don’t be alarmed. I haven’t had much Internet time. The thoughts of my repair bill, and the fact that I didn’t back all of my pictures, documents and programs up doesn’t help my stress level either, and I’m constantly in a bad mood. I’m trying to relax but it’s really difficult when I think about everything at once. I hate that I have to wait until Monday to do anything. I had my husband go to the genius bar at the Apple store and they did the diagnostic, and it’s kind of a big problem. I have to get my hard drive backed up before they repair it cause everything will most likely be wiped off. But I can’t see anything on the screen so I can’t back it up myself… My IT friend tried to hook it up to another monitor but that didn’t work either. So Monday I’m waking up at the butt crack of dawn to get my computer fixed! Apple will have to take it away and mail it back to me so it could be *gasp* a week or so until I have it back!!! *sad face* Maybe it’s a sign. Maybe I rely, and spend a little too much time on my laptop. My husband is pleased to see me more (when I’m not yelling at him to get off his computer, because he’s not allowed to play on his computer when I can’t play on mine.), And I see now it’s Fall. Maybe its’ a nice break from it all. And if anything, it’s a lesson learned. I’ll back up my hard drive more often, and even look into a program called Time Machine.

I’m going to do my best to publish the photo contest tonight… But don’t hate me if it’s more like tomorrow or Monday.

I’m also thinking of scheduling a massage for Monday. I haven’t had a real day off in about a month (when I’m not working I usually babysit in the evenings on my days off), so Monday I want to take a FULL day off and detox! Seriously… I feel like I’m one broken nail away from a nervous breakdown.

Speaking of stress. As my hubs and I were looking over the coming expenses I got a little sad thinking how I had hoped we’d be spending savings money on things for a little one… Not stuff that breaks. But hey… Crap happens right? My mind began to wander and my husband said what I had been thinking inside “Maybe we should wait.”

I don’t think that’s the final decision, but it’s something I’m thinking about. What if this drama is a sign? … Or maybe it’s a test. Either way, I’m wondering if my stress this month can serve as my birth control. I know it’s not good for fertility, and knowing that I’m writing this month off as a lost cause already.

I use to think that “not preventing but not trying” thing sounded ridiculous, but I think I’m beginning to understand what they mean. I can honestly say if I get a BFN next month, I doubt I’ll be very disappointed. But… At least the clock is still running, so if one day I need to get help from a doctor I can saw I’ve been at it awhile.

On a scale from 1-10 on how badly I was trying for a baby I think I went from an 11 to a 5.

Thank heavens though, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Look at what we’re doing for March of Dimes! We reached our half-way goal in one week! There’s still three more weeks, and more time to donate, and win prizes! I have a feeling we’ll make our goal. Thanks so much to all of you who have blogged about this cause and been helping me spread the word. And a BIG thank you to those who have donated! 100% of the donations are going to March of Dimes, and 100% of the prizes are going to donors! Yep! This is all for you! 🙂

I’m still getting more interested sponsors too, so be on the lookout for my coming features!

I’m hoping starting Sunday or Monday to get a couple of sponsor features up a day. Luckily we have another computer (it just isn’t as pretty or as easy for me to use as my Mac). If I stay up late a few nights I think I’ll be able to write a bunch and schedule them to post so I can relax more during the week!

Sorry that 90% of this post was me whining. I think sometimes I’ve just gotta let it out!!

Apr
27
2009

The Paranoia


If my stomach so much as growls I’m thinking I may be pregnant. I’ve gotta go pee–Must be pregnant. My feet hurt… I’m tired… feel faint–Yep, it’s the pregnancy. That’s what I get right? I guess it’s the price I pay for doing this and trying that. I knew this would happen and now I’m ready to KICK myself! Here’s proof how paranoid I am:
I took some of ya’lls advice and just stocked up on pregnancy tests from the Dollar Store. I only got 5 though. That should hold me over for awhile.

It’s weird, I haven’t had this feeling for a long time. I’ve been on the pill, the depo shot, had an IUD, and finally… after about 5 years of diverse birth control I’m not using hormones.

I must admit, I use to think people who weren’t using a hormonal form of birth control were kind of dumb… Now that I’ve crossed over to that side of the fence I can see it’s not that strange, and it’s a little annoying when people say “you’re going to get pregnant right away.” Well I hope not (that’s not the plan)! BUT… My GYN said it could take up to a year for my cycle to go back to normal so I figured it would be best to start that timer now if that be the case.

I imagine I’ll find myself in this “so now I know how it feels” scenario a lot more as my journey inches closer and closer toward motherhood. I get the feeling I’ll be eating a lot of my words.

I’m trying not to talk about my paranoia. I really don’t want to be “that girl.” You know… The one who’s always talking about the pregnancy-like sensations she feeling but INSISTS she’s not (or doesn’t think she’s) pregnant. Although I wouldn’t mind being like Michelle, and making my own personal book of my crazy-mind feelings of “maybe I’m pregnant” in a TTC Journal (when I’m actually TTC).

So far I’ve been pretty good about taking my Basal Temperature. I printed out about 6 months worth of charts and I’ve already got some dots on it! I’m surprised how FUN. It is–Wait… I’m not sure if “fun” is the right word, but it sure is interesting! I ordered “Taking Charge of Your Fertility” like a lot of you recommended. If what yall all are saying about it is right I should know when to and not to get pregnant (again, the latter being my goal). And I’m excited just to understand my anatomy better, I think it should be coming in this week! I actually don’t even mind checking out that other stuff… Eer, keeping an eye on it at least (I’m not sure I know how the whole “process” should be done yet, I’m counting on the book for that one). Anything that keeps me from screwing up I’m all for!

I’m mostly worried because I just got a Tetanus/Pertussis shot and the doctor said I should wait three months before TTC, plus I’m not sure what hormones are still in my system after removing the Mirena, I’ve still got a little dental work to get done, AND I’m still trying to ween myself off 5-hour energy shots. Well I wanted to wait that long or longer ANYWAY but I’d feel bad if I messed up my fetus, hence my extra dose of paranoia, coming right up!

I know there was a lot of freak out over this post. I had been giving my updates on my whole IUD situation via Twitter and wasn’t sure if I’d get around to blogging about it. I hadn’t held back before so I figured why stop now?

There were a lot of questions and assumptions. One of my friends went as far as saying:

“Did I just miss something really really important– you’re OFF all forms of BC??? Wowza! That’s amazing! I think I will just live vicariously through you right now because if one more person tells me right now is the perfect time for me to have a baby, I may kick them in the nuts.”

Hunni, I know how you feel, and no, my baby making machine isn’t “on” yet, therefore I am NOT off all forms of birth control if ya know what I mean (*wink wink nudge nudge*)

My baby makin’ machine is warming up. Since The Removal, it’s draining of it’s old oil and getting back to it’s eco-friendly state. I’m not brave enough to leave it on and running unattended yet… I’m still keeping a close watch and protecting it for now. Although I’ll have to tell you I tried these and I hate it. No… I think I’m allergic or something cause it’s no fun AT ALL. So instead I’m giving the NFP (which I’m going to have to do a whole ‘nother post on) a little try as well as some of this.

I guess the chances of a slip up are higher now… That makes me think if a baby is what God wants me to have, he’ll make it happen anyway. Although I know He can make anything happen… I’ve made that “anything” easier to achieve now, so “Bring it” I say, (If you want though, oh please, only if you want).

I will say though, I’m already paranoid up the Ying-Yang that I could be… Ya know–(I’m worried if I type it out it’ll be true). Before, it felt like there was no chance it was gonna happen… I mean, technically there was a .01% chance, but I’m not one to beat the odds… Unless it’s something bad, which in this case I guess I’m a little surprised it didn’t happen. ANYWAY… Yea, I’m not sure how great that stuff mentioned above works, but I guess I’ll find out in a couple of weeks… Wish me luck (no, don’t wish that I’m preg–AHH I almost wrote it!).

I can feel it already… My nervousness… I have a feeling I’m going to be spending a lot of pregnancy tests again *sigh.* No No… I won’t let myself. Not until I’m like 2 months late!

No, the IUD coming out did not hurt. That’s an FAQ I get a lot. I heard rumors it would hurt way worse than getting it in, but I actually didn’t feel a thing. A lot of people ask how I even got one before having a kid… I think it depends on your doctor. I have a couple other friends who have them too. And the biggest question of TTC?!?! And if it wasn’t implied enough above, the answer is “No.”

Apr
17
2009

The Removal


I called the doctor’s office of where I’m getting my checkup and asked if they did Mirena removals. They didn’t, so I called my “female doctor” right away, knowing it normally takes awhile for me to get in for an appointment. Needless to say I was quite surprised when they asked “How does next Tuesday sound?” It sounded… Soon. I was expecting at least a month, not seven days.

The week went by quickly, my mental countdown was ticking all week, but it wasn’t until the day before and morning of that I really began to think of excuses. 24 hours, 10 hours, 2 hours… The closer it got to my appointment time the more I thought of canceling–Especially since it was the same day of Oprah’s show on “motherhood” which was making me rethink it all. I was moments away, debating my decision on Twitter when I finally got the courage to just go!

The whole way there I watched for signs to turn around, to cancel. I didn’t get lost–That was a good sign. I was almost on time-An OK sign. I found a parking spot–Good sign. But when I went upstairs to my doctor’s office, and the lady gave me weird looks about my insurance, I knew that wasn’t a good sign.

I am blessed with good insurance. It covers 100% of my health care fees so long as I visit a place that’s “in network” (which most places are). So when the woman verifying my insurance told me they didn’t cover IUD removals, and that I’d have to pay the $300 I figured that was the sign I was waiting for… A sign that I shouldn’t go through with it. She told me today I was in luck, if I did it then I’d get 25% off an only have to pay $200 something. What? To pull a string? No thank-you!

I got up to leave but on my way out (in near tears) I decided to call my insurance myself. Why would they pay for the device and insertion but leave me to live with it the rest of my life?

My gut instinct was right–That lady, and whoever she talked to were wrong. The man on the phone told me I’d only have to pay a $30 copay. I kept him on the phone, marched back into the office of snooty people and handed her my phone. After she and him discussed the matter they came to the conclusion that I’d actually have to pay my $150 deductible. And she made it clear that it needed to be paid up front. Who did she think I was and why was she acting like I couldn’t pay my bill? What? Whatever. An hour had passed since my appointment time and after going over the cost with my husband I decided if they could get me in right then, I’d do it, if not, I’d wait, and possibly find a new doctor. The woman told me she could get me in right away so I went ahead and proceeded.

My wait time in the waiting room was seconds, that made me happy. But the time I spent waiting in the patient room was ridiculous. I was in a hurry to undress before the doctor arrived but then waited another half hour (no joke) before she even came in… Then she was in and our in less than 2 minutes… And I/my insurance paid $300 for that? I should be a GYNO!

Since my “operation” (I’m going to call it that because of the cost) I’ve been a little moody. And I think it’s a little ironic that just days after getting it out I decide to change my mind. I haven’t been able to diagnose myself yet (I’m a hypochondriac so I do that kinda stuff) but I’m thinking it’s a combination of a couple of things: 1. Stress. I try not to stress often, but lately I feel like a ticking time bomb. 2. Pregnant friends. How can I swoon over my best friends’ bellies and babies if I have my own? and 3. Hormones, I think that’s causing my stress, and hyperactive jealousy. Can I blame my hormones for everything? I think I may try.

Mar
25
2009

The Break


If you’ve been reading about my dilemma here and then the conversations here then you know what I mean when I say I’ve had a lot on my mind. I’ve come to terms with the fact that everything will work out. I think I want to address two ideas that were brought up in the comments section and wrap up my whiny rants and pull my husband out from under the bus.

First, on not using birth control, but not trying… Hubs is definitely not down for that… And while I wouldn’t see it as actively “trying” I still would say it kind of is.. I mean, yea. I never really got that myself, when my friends would say they weren’t on birth control but weren’t trying for a baby. I guess it depends on the way you feel… If you don’t care if you get pregnant either way, maybe it’s not really a feeling of “trying” for a baby, but if you’re disappointed when you get your visit from aunt flow, maybe deep down you are… Just a thought.

As for my mentioning of my invisible window of opportunity… I’m not talking about my age. I know I’m young, and technically should be able to make babies for quite some time. To be honest, it use to confuse and kind of upset me when young women would tell me they wanted to start trying ASAP because something may happen and they won’t be able to later on. I didn’t get why they would say something so–So, negative sounding. I’m not sure if it’s a religious, cultural belief, or a wives tale that’s been passed on, I have no idea what it is, and I don’t think anyone can until they feel it themselves.

I don’t feel like if I don’t have a child NOW I may not ever be able to, but I do feel like now is the right time, but my strong impression of that feeling is diminishing and I’m not sure if it’s because maybe it’s not the time, or because the time is coming and going… This time. –Did all of that jibber jabber make sense? Basically, I know my feelings for wanting a child right now are beyond myself and my own feelings, I know that this time, it’s much more than baby hunger or an urge.

Anyway, I’m not really trying to bring it up anymore, we’ll come together on it eventually… The last thing I want to do us push him into something he really doesn’t want and he resent me/our child for it. I couldn’t really see that happening but ya never know! If one of us has to be miserable and depressed I’d rather it be me than him anyway. I may still get my IUD taken out soon though, a compromise we’re debating (letting the hormones wear off while using a non-hormonal form of BC). We have a doctor’s appointment next month, we’ll see how that goes. Oh and I will mention that after dropping the subject, he has already brought up the conversation TWICE today. He says he really wants to have a child right now too but doesn’t feel like it would be a responsible thing to do because we’re not “financially” able. After just hearing him out I’ve decided to let it go for now. I still feel the way I do but I feel like he’ll come around on his own if we’re suppose to.

On a side note…I went to the dentist today and he said I have some work to get done… 13 cavities!! WHATEVER! Ok, no joke.. I think he’s trying to rip me off. I went to the dentist 9 months ago and was told I had great teeth, no cavities! Oh, and I’ve only had 1 cavity in my entire life! Now all of a sudden I have 13? Not buying it! I’m going to get a second opinion… If I can figure out how that works. Either way I’ve gotta get that done beforehand right?

Mar
24
2009

The Talk Again


Alright, I didn’t think I could go back to my scheduled topics without updating my real current problem at hand… Ok, problem may be a little harsh, it feels that way but to be PC I’ll call it my dilemma.

You may have remembered “The Talk” from before… Well we have a lot of those lately. They basically all go the same way:
“Baby?”
“Not now”
“Why not?” (tears)
“Cause my school, job… blah blah blah”
(more tears)
“Ok well maybe sooner rather than later”
“When?”
“I dunno”
“In two months?”
“Sure” (under the condition that he gets so far in school and gets a part-time job, which in this economy isn’t easy)

We actually had this exact conversation TWICE yesterday and when we got as far as:
“Baby?”
“No”
(TEARS)
He just started laughing at me and asked “Didn’t we just have this conversation?”

And it’s kind of the same cycle every month right now. I’m kind of just trying to keep my cool, and send our resumes for him in secret.

I did get so ticked that I applied to be an egg donor. ‘If I’m not having my kids someone might as well’ was my thinking process. And I’d get $7,000. I filled out all the forms but held the stamp after reading that in rare cases something will go wrong, my ovary will swell, nearly burst and possibly need to be removed. I was still in a state of belligerence, and completed the online portion of it anyway, but I decided to hold off on sending the mailed forms. The fact that my husband HATES the idea doesn’t help any. It actually makes me want to do it more.

I know I’m not talking typing rationally, but it’s ok… I know I’m just a little upset, and when this all blows over I’ll come to my senses.

It’s just that I can’t help but feel like my invisible window of opportunity is closing. I have no way of knowing that it just feels that way. I hope I’m wrong, and that when we both feel right about it we’ll actually BE able to produce spawn. Oh we’d better be… Cause Lawd knows if it takes a year or two I will not be a happy wife… No Siree, not after waiting five years.

Then again I kind of blame myself. Why in the world did I get an IUD? I did this on purpose. When I got it at 20 years old I thought ‘I won’t want to start trying until I’m at least 25’ stick it in me! Who knew three years later I’d be plotting away to get it out. I can’t help but feel like it would be SO much easier if I didn’t have to plan a whole ordeal to get it out. It’s a lot easier to stop taking a pack of pills.

Oh… Someone asked me how I got it since I didn’t have any kids… I don’t think it’s a requirement, just a doctor preference, I’ve had my checked a bunch and it’s still in there just fine 🙂

Anyway, I’m about to go to the dentist, one of my before baby makin’ must do’s. So while my husband is lollygagging around, and getting his shiz together to feel “ready” to make a baby, I’m one by one, crossing of things on my baby bucket list… And hopefully, sometime this year, we’ll meet on the same page.

Feb
21
2009

The Snip Snip


It has come to my attention that some women think after taking mass amounts of hormones for years, and/or mapping your cycle religiously, then pushing 8+ pound babies out of our whoohas, it’s not fair for us to ALSO have to get our Baby Makin’ organs tied or removed… HE should do it. Isn’t all that we do enough? And to just tie us up when we’re done just seems… Wrong.

A few friends at work were talking about it. “I don’t want to have to go under the knife again after all that.” They have a point. So does Kristen over at Motherhood Uncensored. She broke it down plain and simple.

But I’m not sure what I think. I always thought on my third kid they can just tie me up while they’re down there, but I guess that’s only the case if you have a C-section. But really, women, are we just saying this out of spite? Is it because we can’t make them have babies, take birth control pills or defer our visits from Aunt Flow to them? Is sterilization our only chance for revenge therefore we jump at the opportunity? –I’m not saying one way or another, I’m just asking.

Yea, it’s fun to bring it up an see him squirm, I’m not gonna lie, that’s dang funny! Butmy birth control hasn’t given me horrible side effects and I haven’t been through pregnancy or labor. I’m sure after I’ve experienced an ounce of pain my mind will most likely lean in the direction of HIM getting the snippity snip. But for now, I think I’m open to being the one responsible. Besides… We do everything else anyway, why stop there?

Hi! I’m Jennifer Borget

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I'm a part-time journalist, full-time wife and mother striving to make the world a better place and inspiring others to do the same. This is the space where I share my journey in making the most of every day.

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