10 ways I will NOT use my breast milk

14 months, hours of pumping in the make up room, a half a dozen spilled bottles, 220 ounces of frozen breast milk down to none and one extremely healthy toddler later–I’ve learned a lot about breast milk, pumping, and just lactating in general.

Yes, she’s still nursing. I stopped pumping when she turned one, and she drinks whole milk at school, or when I’m away. She’ll nurse before bed, or when we’re at home from time to time. I’m very proud of the fact that we made it to the year mark. Secretly, I hope she stops some day soon. But then again, another secret part of me enjoys having a way to keep her still when I just want to lounge out on the couch for a while. … Stick a boob in her mouth and BAM! Quiet for days!

Over the past 14 months I’ve learned a lot about nursing and pumping and all that good stuff, but I’m still learning new things all the time. For instance, recently when Lil’ J was attacked by ants and had yucky little bites all over her, some Twitter moms, wanting to be helpful, suggested I squirt a bit of breast milk on them.

Desperate, I gave it a shot. What the heck, it couldn’t hurt right?

After a few days it didn’t look like much had changed, and during her routine check up her pediatrician noticed the bites and suggested I get some Neosporin. Duh! Why didn’t I think of that?

I was beginning to think these Twitter moms were pulling a prank, and I did some Googling to find out where this breast milk on ant bite suggestion came from.

I came across this article and was, quite frankly, pretty grossed out by some of the suggestions.

I told my husband about my efforts in trying to cure Lil’ J’s ant bites and he laughed at my breast milk attempt.

“It’s like the Caribbeans and their coconut water,” he told me. “They suggest you use it to cure anything and everything.”

“Well, I think some of these breast milk suggestions are worse,” I told him.

“Like what?”

“You don’t want to know.”

“Just tell me.”

“Well, apparently some people use breast milk as lube.”

“GROSS! Why did I ask?” I don’t know… I tried to warn him.

And with that I decided to take that list and make my own. 10 things I WON’T be using my breast milk for. Here you go in no particular order:

1. Acne: Ever heard of Proactive? … Or maybe this is the secret ingredient.

2. Diaper Rash: Luckily Lil’ J rarely gets diaper rashes, but it’s much quicker, easier, and probably more effective to use our cream for this.

3. Facial Cleanser: Seriously? You’d think people have gallons of their milk sitting around. Sorry, I don’t wash my face with liquid gold, or my bodily fluids for that matter.

4. Cold Sores: These things are gross enough without the idea of letting milk dry on top of them.

5. Scratches, Scrapes, and Cuts: Bandaids people! And something that works… Like Neosporin.

6. Sexual Lubricant: I think we addressed this enough earlier. But I would like to know who actually has tried this sexy idea.

7. Contact Solution: If you’re in a bind for contact solution please don’t look for the nearest lactating mom. You can make your own by mixing salt with distilled water.

8. Chapped lips: The 25 cent chap stick in the check out aisle appeals to me more.

9. Eye Puffiness/ Redness: Once again, the thought of putting milk in my eyes seems weird and wrong. Coming from a human or not.

10. Ashy Legs/ Dry Skin: I’ll admit, I’ve been in a bind several times where I look down and my legs are pale white from dryness. But it would take far too much milk, and would be far too awkward to pump my milk like a lotion bottle.

What do you think? Would you do any of these things?

Similar Posts


    1. Breastmilk as lube is not gross or weird it is natural,+safe, it comes from your own body after all. Much better than the chemical crap you buy in the store, a whole lot more convenient too! It tastes like really sweet milk, kind of like melted vanilla ice cream. It works great

  1. The only alternative use for my breast milk is when my daughter had goopy eyes from a clogged tear duct. A little squirt from the ole boob and she was right as rain. 🙂 Other than that, it’s oral only.

  2. Ewwww! on using it for lube!!

    I’ve used it for a stuffy nose on my infant, but that’s it. I’ve never even heard of the other suggestions- and wish I’d never heard of that specific one.

    1. Ewww? Seriously? You thi.k your milk is ewww? It’s natural, it washes off(well what doesn’t absorb in) It’s awesome lube. Don’t be such a prude

  3. I’ve used it on acne for me and it seemed to have worked. Also used it on a scratch that baby T got on her leg from my ring. Not sure how well that did for her but it was worth a shot. 🙂 Not sure I’d ever consider using it as lube though!? Crazy people.

  4. I don’t understand why or how breast milk is gross. It’s just milk. Sure it comes from the body but so does cow’s BREAST milk which people drink/use without any problem. (I don’t because I find animal milk more gross than any type of milk because of the business behind it.)

    I’d totally try one of those things. At least you know it’s safe…

    1. If you’re going to be close-minded, would you mind also being close-mouthed! Do a bit of research on the things you’re choosing to apply over breastmilk because “it’s gross.” Uneducated rants are just plain disgusting.

  5. Tiffany, I don’t think breast milk is gross but I think it can seem very gross when it’s used for things like lube. Spit and urin is natural too but that doesn’t mean I’ll put it on my face.

    And for the record I don’t like milk so I’m not one of those “let’s use cows milk instead” people. And I doubt people use it (cows milk) for chap stick, lotion and mosquito bites… At least not that I’ve heard.

  6. Kira, I’ve heard of it being used for stuffy noses quite a bit. Luckily Lil’ J hasn’t really ever been sick *knock on wood* so I never was faced with that decision. Aside from my bug bite remedy attempt I’ve only used it as food. That’s been good enough for me.

  7. Well, since acne medications are typical not considered safe to use while pregnant and/or breastfeeding, I certainly understand why someone would use breastmilk instead. And for eye funkiness or clogged noses? Yeah, breastmilk totally works. That’s pretty much all I’d use it for. Medicinal stuff only. I won’t drink my own, and I certainly won’t be using it as a lube! Nah thanks. 🙂

  8. When I had Moo and she had scratched herself up in the nursery cause one of her mitts came off, the Dr recommended I put a little breastmilk on them. The enzymes in milk (human & cow) soothe the skin which us why milk baths at spas was once popular. But too much breastmilk on the face without moisturizing it can dry the skin out.

    Aside from that one time in the hospital, I’ve never used my milk for anything but food either. I think breastmilk has a lot of alternative uses but I agree that lube and contact solution need not be on them. And you should never put your boob near a cold sore because it is a form of herpes, which is contagious. You would not want to pass cold sore germs to your infant or toddler.

  9. Lube, definitely not. LOL But, like you, I learned a lot about the benefits of breast milk after having nursed my daughter {we went 20 months before she self weaned}.

    There was a time she had scratched her eye and it was red and irritated. I put a few drops of pumped milk in the affected eye and the next day it was cleared up. Would I put it in my eye? Only if I had nothing else {honestly that does weird me out a bit}. Another time my daughter bit me while nursing pretty bad, each day I put expressed milk on it and it healed quickly. And I’ve used it when she had a stuffy nose as a baby and had problems breathing while nursing.

    So, breast milk does work quite well for healing and can be effective for medicinal purposes 🙂 I think some people just have different comfort levels with the how far they’ll go with it. 😉

  10. I have used BM for snotty noses, cuts and scrapes (on me and my daughter), and diaper rash. I’ve even heard of people putting it in their kids ears to treat ear infections. I’ve never heard of the lube idea, BUT do you know what is in KY? Maybe it’s a better “natural/green” option?? Not sure I could try it though. lol

    Congrats on brestfeeding for a year…keep up the good work mamma! 🙂

  11. Haha thank you for your post, it made me laugh. I would actually use most of these, w the limit of bm as lube. Not to be to graphic but it’s kind of funny, the lube, because in the early months breastfeeding kind of acts as the anti-lube. Kind of inguineus. (but really I wouldn’t do it)

  12. I have a friend who’s mother had cancer (relapse) and she gave her mom her breast milk to drink while she had chemo, and it prevented her from being sick! I also read an article about a study that was done about breast milk’s cancer fighting properties.

    Yeah, your top 10 is pretty gross, I wouldn’t do that either. But the health benefits from it are simply amazing! (from consumption of course 🙂

  13. I have used breast milk on my 1st son’s clogged tear duct. Nothing else worked! Someone online told me to try breast milk and it worked like magic and cleared it up overnight. Unfortunately, it kept coming back long after our nursing journey ended 🙁

    I really suck at pumping (and admire you ladies who pump so well), so I couldn’t use my bm on every little scrape and sore that my kids get, because the baby would never get to drink any if I did!

  14. I have also used my BM for Ada’s goopy eye before but that’s all. It is supposed to be an effective treatment for pinkeye–one of my sisters was on a missions trip in the mountains of Mexico and a nursing mother offered to treat one of the male team members pinkeye, they were far from a pharmacy and it worked! Not sure I could use a random persons BM in my eye though 😉

    As far as animal milk goes, goat milk soap and lotion are very popular and very moisturizing. I only use it from a local dairy where I know the person making it and that the animals are very well treated though.

  15. Yeah, someone I know is a “breast milk cures everything” type of person, and she used it when her oldest daughter had ear infections. Guess what? It didn’t help, and now from repeated infections the girl has hearing problems. This woman told me to use me milk when my daughter kept getting pink eye, yeah, it did absolutely nothing.

  16. Both coconut oil and breastmilk contain large amounts of lauric acid, which is antimicrobial. I can totally see both of these things being used as a “cure all” and actually working. I haven’t used bm for all these things you have listed (some of them, though. Plus putting in in my kiddos’ ears when I suspect infections there) but in a pinch, I absolutely would. With the exception of lube. And that is because yeast LOVES bm (and why wouldn’t it? It’s yummy!) and I think using it as a sexual lubricant could potentially cause a yeast infection. That would be awful! 😀

  17. Seriously? Everyone thinks the lube idea is way out there? I don’t. I haven’t done it, but I’ll give it a try sometime. Seems more convenient than fumbling through the nightstand for lube. Though I do agree with Mallory that it could potentially cause a wicked yeast infection.

    I have used BM on acne. Just squirt a little into a clean hand and dab it on. Easy peasy.

    Of course this would all be gross if you were getting milk from a random person off the street. However, using one’s own milk to do any of these things does not sound gross to me. You made the milk, you can use it for whatever you want. If I wore contacts and ran out of solution I’d have no problem using my own milk.

  18. Haha Evelyn @ HauteMilk… Well, giving your name and photo I can tell this sort of thing is your passion. Whatever floats your boat! I prefer to keep mine for feeding my babies. I don’t have buckets of it sitting around. And seeing as it didn’t work for ant bites I haven’t wasted time trying it for other things.

    If the world was ending and there was no other source for these things then ok fine, whatever, but luckily I have face cream, lotion, lube and everything else in it’s own respect.

  19. I’ve heard of breast milk being used successfully for a lot of stuff. Pretty sure I would not use it for the lube thought!

    Congrats on making it to a year. I made it to about 13 months and my daughter weaned herself.

  20. This is all just too funny to me :). Who knew it could be (or was being) used for all that! The sex one is waaaay out there. I wouldn’t even let hubby near my boobs when I was breastfeeding, much less use my baby’s food as lube!! I would NEVER be able to feed him again.

  21. This list made me laugh so hard!

    I heard on the radio recently about a caller who squirted milk from five feet away at her husband once. Funny, but still not something I think I’m gonna do, so maybe we add #11: I will not use breast milk as a weapon.

  22. It’s great lube. I haven’t personally tried it for diaper rash, but if my toddler gets a diaper rash I will give it a shot, I’d much rather put that on her skin than chemicals otherwise known as diaper rash cream
    And as for washing your face with it: it doesn’t take gallons of anything to wash your face, just a little bit. Besides the more milk you use/nurse/remove from the breast, the more you make

  23. I know this is an old article, but….
    Why would you be grossed out by putting milk on your skin when your child drinks it? It has all sorts of beneficial things, it’s all natural, and not full of chemicals. Why wouldn’t you want to use something chemical free for acne vs something full of chemicals???
    The lube part, yea, a bit strange, but hey, some people prefer not to put chemicals on their genitals. Some people are sensitive to non-natural ingredients. Ridiculous you find something SO gross yet give it to your child.

  24. The eye goop wasn’t cleared up for my child usingbdrops for two weeks, should have taken one. Fresh breast milk cleared it in two days

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *