I know a lot of people who say they like Donald Trump because “he says it like it is” he’s not afraid of not being “politically correct” or offending anyone. So I’m hoping the same people who feel that way won’t take offense to what I’m about to say. This is coming from a place of love and a yearning to help facilitate understanding and maybe start a dialogue.

I normally find myself positioned right smack in the middle of a lot of divisive topics. Being a woman, a black woman… A black woman who happens to be Mormon (I’m like Obama, Hillary and Romney wrapped into one)–and members of my religion typically have extremely conservative social opinions. I lived in Utah for four years but before that I was raised in the south (Georgia). There I was called a nigger umm… Several times. And now living in Texas (though thankfully Austin–It could be worse) I still hear the word flying around now and then in unexpected places. Oh, and on top of all that I’m married to a white cop. Needless to say, I’ve definitely had quite the mix of friends and lived in and experienced diverse communities.

our-family

I’ve learned to listen, see, and try to understand different viewpoints. I can understand why my religious friends are so passionately anti-abortion. I can understand why my gay friends are hurt when others speak out against their marriage. Interracial marriages only became legal in all 50 states less than 50 years ago (and my church has disapproved in even more recent history). There are a lot of people still alive on this earth today who feel my marriage is wrong so yea–Solidarity.

All of that said. I know I still have a lot of work to do. I’m not perfect and I still have a lot of understanding to gain. But the one thing I will never ever understand.–The one thing I will never ever support is hate.

We all know racism is bad.

We being you and I. If you are a regular visitor to my blog I know we at least agree on that. I also think it’s pretty bad to call someone a racist just because they don’t agree with you. That said, there are other things you can say or do to set off my racist red alert.

I’ve had several conversations with friends over the last couple of days that have the thesis of “I voted for Trump but I’m not a racist, a bigot or a homophobe.”

I can understand why people are on the defense because there are a lot of harsh words and ugly memes going around right now. Maybe you scroll through your newsfeed and see something about Trump voters being bigots and think “but that’s not me!” To that I say calm down. Take a deep breath and don’t take it personally (unless someone is directly calling you out, but I’ll get to that in a moment).

As my husband blocks traffic so protestors can safely march in solidarity against Trump in the middle of the roadway, many yell and call him a racist cop. We laugh about that.

I know some of you are looking at me and saying: “No Jennifer, I mean I had someone I thought was a friend flat out call me a racist because I voted for Trump!”

Ok, well sometimes that happens too. But may I ask what conversations happened before it escalated to this point? Were you defending Trump and his remarks about minorities? Do you think what he said was wrong? Do you even care? When you were explaining the reasons why you voted for Trump did you fail to mention your distaste for his generalizing Mexicans as rapists and drug dealers? Of course you don’t owe your explanation to anyone, I’m just trying to help explain why your apathetic attitude may come across as acceptance, and why acceptance of this is not ok.

How do you feel about the racism that’s erupting after this election?

No, I’m not talking about the peaceful protests that are a protected by the constitution. No, I’m not even talking about the riots–Though I imagine you’re well aware of those. I’m talking about the middle school kids who are chanting “Build that wall” in the cafeteria around their Latino classmates who are in tears. I’m talking about racial slurs being written on black people’s cars. I’m talking about minorities being threatened by white people in the name of “yea we won!” I’m talking about the KKK planning a celebratory gathering. I’m talking about some of these terrible things that happened the day after Trump was elected president.

Did you not know about this? If not, that’s part of the problem. See, for minorities–For me, this really isn’t anything new. I am well aware that racism is alive and well today. We live it. If you haven’t noticed you probably aren’t paying attention. But when I read about these incidents and I don’t see my friends who say they voted for him saying that’s wrong, I wonder if they think that’s right. Why share sarcastic memes about violent protestors but nothing about the violent hate crimes?

Forgive me if I seem to be overreacting but these are serious emotional triggers for me. And it doesn’t seem logical, but now when I walk to the mailbox with my kids my pulse quickens when a lifted pickup truck passes by. These are serious issues facing people right now. Issues I think about just existing as a family. And I don’t even wear a hijab or run the risk of having family being deported. I imagine it must feel even worse for my Muslim and Mexican friends.

Unfortunately, electing someone despite their very outspokenly skewed views of Muslims, Mexicans, Latinos, Blacks, people with disabilities and let’s not forget women, can lead some people to believe that way of thinking is acceptable.

This is the reason I worry.

Not just about possibly of discriminatory policies that may be coming in the future, but because of the hateful actions from those very happy about the election results. Because racist people now think it’s ok to come out of hiding and say what they really think.

I know you don’t want to be associated with that crowd. I don’t want you to either. To agree with Trump politically is one thing, but when you don’t stand against the racist things that are coming from this, or the hurtful things he said himself, then I’m left wondering if you agree with them.

So if you say you are not racist, that you do not agree with the things Trump has said about minorities or Muslims. Say it! Take a stand. Stand up to racism. Don’t allow it, don’t condone it, speak against it. I know it’s scary, I know it’s probably outside of your comfort level and the type of things you normally talk about, but we can’t do it alone. We need you to help bridge the divide.

To help stand up for what’s right.

For me… Just having someone acknowledge my feelings goes a long way. I have two friends who have recently reached out to me and said how they look at the world differently. How when they’re out and see people donning confederate flags they wonder how that encounter might go if they were Black. Just that acknowledgement of “Hey, racism sucks, I’m sorry you have to deal with this,” goes a long way… for me at least. I guess I’m easy to please.

So may I suggest we use this awkward period after an election where we’re giving our friends and relatives the side eye to also learn a little more about each other?

Look around at your circle of friends. How diverse are they? Do you have friends who voted for the other guy (or gal)? Do you have friends who practice different religions? Friends of different races? Do you have gay friends? If all of your friends look and/or think like you do, it may be time to ask yourself why, and consider how your homogenous circle could affect your views of the world.

I’m not going to call you a racist because you voted for Trump. But your actions now will speak much louder than your vote.


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Renee says:

All I can say is…thank you.

James Oliver says:

Yes, yes, yes. A million times yes. Sharing now.
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Cajun says:

This! So much this! I’m a Republican who did not vote for Trump. Speaking out against his behavior is my new passion project. I’ll even take it a step further than you have so eloquently and thoughtfully put it here. If you comment on my posts against Trump’s racist, sexist, bigoted, misogynistic and xenophobic behavior with a comment saying “he’s not any of those things because _______”, then don’t be offended when I read you the riot act about how silence is complicit. Don’t be offended when my response to you claiming “racism had been made worse by this last administration” is to point out that obviously you didn’t care about racism or discrimination enough to notice it before that because it was still possible for you to ignore it from your place of privilege. I’m positively appalled by the number of people I grew up with that can somehow separate his words from his wishy washy policy. I’m so sorry your family is faced with these realities. I’m so scared for you and so scared for so many of my friends. I’m so scared even for your husband and mine. While I know their hearts don’t harbor this hate, I know too tensions are running high for everyone. And soon I fear everyone will start acting out against others based solely on their appearance. I’ll be praying for your family and for everyone’s safety.
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Dannie Shuler says:

Wow and thank you!!

Toni says:

First I just want to say I’m African American and I voted for Trump because the racist title was perpetuated by the media and it is not true. It’s the media that caused the problems happening right now. Hillary Clinton’s camped worked endlessly to tie Trump to the KKK and have women come out against him with false accusations. She started the problems when she generalized half of his supporters as deplorables. It has been quite difficult for me to understand the reasoning of people who didn’t vote for Trump and continually attack those who did. I’m sure I can speak for most when I say Hillary did not lose because she was a woman. Real Americans also had real concerns about our national safety, about most likely fighting a nuclear war with Russia, about soldiers that were left in Benghazi, about lies that were told, about paying for healthcare, about our lives as middle class citizens, about an increase in our taxes and taking care of our family, about Hillary’s participation in the occult, about her husband Bill Clinton being in a position of power again, about “illegal” immigrants and “illegal” immigrants from terrorist based countries pouring across our borders, about the blatant corruption happening at the highest levels of our government, about Hillary’s mentor being a member of the KKK, and I can go on. So don’t write off our reasons for voting for Trump as just something lunatic. Democrats have continually done so. They want people who voted for Trump to understand them when they won’t even consider the reasons why we did not vote for Hillary and chalk it up to us being every “ist” in the book. When it came down to the line it is was a choice of Someone who always doesn’t use the write words vs the actions of the other. I believe most Americans truly did forgive Trump after he apologized for the things he said a decade ago and as a Christian I believe he is afforded my forgiveness. Hillary has never offered an apology instead she continually blamed others and deflected so she didn’t have to explain her crimes. The truth is the media and her camp created this firestorm and these divides. And many of them existed before either decided to run for office but her camp brought it to the tipping point. As an African American woman I have been very saddened by the comments of others who voted Democratic; it is just as hard for me to find reasons as to why most of my race living on government dependency and continually being ignored by democrats in office would vote for Hillary. There is never one side to a story.

Michael Buro says:

I would have hoped you would have read the Benghazi transcripts before you painted her with the GOP rhetoric. As far as Trump is concerned how do you dismiss his very public mocking of minorities, woman, the handicapped, his silent acceptance of the violence that occurred at his events. the non-distancing of white supremacy groups that endorsed him, his many blatant bold-faced lies he told, not to mention his double downing on the many positions he took during the campaign. Have you looked at the states where ACA rates were the highest and then checked to see it they participated in the program? Silence in many situations equals acquiescence.

Jennifer says:

Jennifer, I just shared your post with my own comments on my facebook page. You’ve said exactly what I’ve been feeling. The whole situation makes my heart hurt. Proud of you for standing up!

Shauna says:

Toni,

It was the words from Trump’s mouth that showed him to divide this nation. The actual words he shared making racism the norm in America.

James Oliver says:

Did you even read Jennifer’s article?

This is not about Hillary. And yes, Trump has said and perpetuated racist things-just google it for crying out loud.

And no one needs to work to tie Trump to the KKK-they are having a parade in NC to celebrate his victory.

Amanda says:

I am a conservative, homeschooling mama, Christian, white female. I did vote for Trump and it had nothing to do with racism. My overall family is mixed race and beautiful. I did not vote out of hate. I voted for Trump for a few reasons. I voted Trump because I don’t like the direction our American economy was going. I voted Trump because I don’t agree with abortion. I voted Trump because he wants to get rid of common core and the only candidate that stated anything about homeschooling. I voted Trump because he is willing to fight for my gun rights. I voted Trump because it was a vote against Hillary Clinton and her Clinton Foundation. I voted Trump because I don’t agree with what is going on in the middle east. I voted Trump and it had nothing to do with race.

Michael Buro says:

Then I would imagine you have investigated the Trump foundation to compare their “good” works with the Clinton’s. As far your gun rights, are you aware that in order to overturn an amendment you would need hree-fourths of the state legislatures approve it, or ratifying conventions in three-fourths of the states approve it. Ha fat chance of that happening. Hmm the economy, this from a man who manufactured his line of goods overseas and built his buildings with steel from China. Been reading on his cabinet choices? Yeah good solid business men and capitalists, one with strong ties to Russia. As a homeschooler what do you care about common core, your teaching at home.

Kas says:

I know this is a late, but I read comments of people who voted for Trump, and instead of answering Jennifer’s honest questions of how do you feel about the racism, and hate as a result of his victory, you jump right into defending your vote. That’s part of the problem, the complete ignorance of what other people are going through, to focus on defending yourself. As Christians we should realize it is never about us, but as soon as you start defending your vote, and ignoring the real life terrors of others, you made it about you. Let’s take the focus off ourselves and be the change we want to see, instead of relying on a vote.

Stephanie says:

I think this is a lot of it. It is now quite seriously a battle of being called a racist before you ever get a chance to defend yourself. One of the reasons, among many others, that I voted for Trump and not Hillary is that Hillary and her supporters will very quickly call me a racist, homophobic, misoginist, all of it, before they know anything more about me than that I supported Trump. How am I supposed to be endeared to a cause where I am told, “you’re white so you’re racist, and if you deny it you’re even more racist AND ignorant”.

Mara Grimes says:

Jennifer, I just came across your blog, you just had me in tears…am a afro-latina married to a white cop, with kids and a christian (this year has been hard emotionally). You have said what my group of friends have been talking about since Tuesday night (actually Wednesday morning), you right when someone says “i just didn’t know” goes a long way. I had a mom from my kids school write “I’ve been living in a bubble, feeling that we’ve come farther than we have.” on one of my FB post about my feelings. That feeling of feeling like someone heard you, goes go far. Keep up the good work.

LeShelle Mocniak says:

I love this and so glad you wrote this. I too am married to a white man with two beautiful biracial children. I am on edge right now. I’m finding myself watching my children with heighten sensitivity. Having my son take the trash out is now a two person affair. I get nervous when I run in the morning every time a car passes by and I too wonder if those who voted for trump want me or my family here in America. Only time will tell. I want Trump to do a great job, because our country deserves it, but I’m so worry about what I have seen the last two days.

Thanks so much for reading this. I needed to see today.

Patricia says:

Jennifer, thank you for this. You and I may have walked different paths, but here again you have so wonderfully articulated the matters on my heart. I am an African American Christian women married to a white man. We are from California and now live in Georgia. I feel it. It hurts. And I simply want people to understand that racism is not a figment of anyone’s imagination. That doesn’t change whether or not you’ve personally experienced it. This is the reality. Regardless of your vote, let us all stand for what is right.

Lisa says:

It really bothers me when people say they only experience racism in the south. I have black friends who have lived up north and said they experienced it there as well. And, believe it or not, racism goes both ways. I am white and often hear black comedians calling us crackers, etc. I went to a black friends birthday party. I was the only white person there. It didn’t bother me but what did were the cold looks and no one speaking to me. My friend had not arrived yet. I sat there over an hour and no one besides the hostess made any effort to speak to me. One other time I went to my friends house and got turned around trying to find her house. I had to turn around in the subdivision. A young black boy was in his yard and he yelled at me to get out of their neighborhood. I’ve been ignored at a store while the black cashier rushed to help another black customer who came in after me. So it’s clear to me that racism comes in all colors. I get really tired of people assuming I am racist because I am white and southern. And no I did not vote for trump.

Patricia says:

Lisa,

I’m truly sorry for your experiences but you’ve made a number of inaccurate assumptions based on my reply.

First and foremost I never said that racism only exists in the south. I only stated that being from California and recently moving to the South it does feel very different. There is a different culture here and in my personal experience the most outright racism I have felt has been in the southern region.

Sadly, I have experienced racism in different states up north and on the west coast as well. I have friends with many stories to tell who live in various locations. I have also experienced reverse racism which is a whole other can of worms.

No one is saying that all white southern individuals are racist as I am sure that you are not claiming that all black people will call you names or make you feel isolated at parties or ignore you at the cash register. Just as you are tired of of the assumption being made that you are racist because you are a southern white woman I’m tired of the numerous assumptions being made simply because I’m black.

If you are sensitive to the fact that you have been stereotyped then make a conscious effort to change that. That was, to me, the point of what she wrote. Whether or not you voted for Trump, if you are not a racist but you see unjust things are happening maybe it’s time for you to find out how you can make a difference.
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Patricia says:

** Point off clarification because I was using the voice device…I intended to say that I’ve also experienced the role of racism at work and in my relationship, not reverse racism. That entire idea is a whole other can of worms.

Ari says:

Nobody cares if Trump is or isn’t racist the major point of her post is that the backlash of hate that is spewing out is a problem AND it ties to his supporters thinking they can do what they want now. All we need is to know you people that voted for him aren’t condoning it!! And if you’re clearly not why aren’t more of you speaking out to show hey all Trump supporters aren’t hate filled and we want to come together peacefully, until you show me that all I see is hatred while backing him. Show all the ignorant people that his purpose is to make us better not divide us…

Margaret says:

I think some people do not say they voted for Trump for the simple reason being they are afraid, too. They will be automatically labeled and attacked. From what I can see, the fear works both ways in this mess of an election. My choice will remain private forever, because no matter who I voted for, someone will attack me. Some of the silence may simply be fear. So much in this world needs fixing, it is so much more than racism, etc. Why on earth do we live in a society where some are afraid to simply share an opinion?!

Bob Fields says:

I’m not trying to cause arguments. I just have some legitimate questions.

How can you judge a man by the worst of the people who happen support him? What if we judged all black people by the violent, murderous Black Lives Matter movement? Clearly the Black community is racist too, shouting things like “Kill all the white babies.” I don’t believe that just because someone says “Black Lives Matter” that they automatically should be associated with the worst of the group. This double standard has got to stop.

By definition, racism is the belief that all members of each race possess characteristics or abilities specific to that race, especially so as to distinguish it as inferior or superior to another race or races. Based on that definition, saying “Fuck White People” (which has been spray painted on monuments since Trump’s election), because one racist man was elected president, is grouping all of the white people together based on the actions or words of one man. Just because I support Trump doesn’t mean I support racism. Just because you support Hillary doesn’t mean you support abortion. We live in a world where there will always be evil, and there will always be someone hurting even when there were good intentions. There will ALWAYS be racist people on BOTH SIDES. That doesn’t mean all of the rest on that side are racist.

Kate says:

I am sickened by this whole thing, sharing many of your feelings, my heart hurting every time I witness a mean awful verbal or physical gesture. Humans beating other humans? It’s just too much. But, I’m on the opposite side of the fence of you. All I have been reading, watching, hearing is racism and violence against whites, instigated by minorities accusing the whites of being racist. Violent Hillary supporters dragging out of cars and beating whites. I have many links of proof, but frankly this is just too consuming for me. I’ll attach one example. This is not to be controversial. I am an extremely kind and empathetic person. Just questioning how two completely rational people are seeing two completely different stories, in disbelief of and afraid of the other. It has GOT to have something to do with the media. They must know how to tap in and call to your senses, directing which links you choose to open and follow closely and believe. They are perpetuating all of this; creating a huge race war.

https://www.conservativeoutfitters.com/blogs/news/video-high-school-girl-brutally-beaten-on-camera-for-supporting-trump

Gerals L says:

I’m sure the incidents against Trumo supprters are
so few compared to the hate coming from the other direction. I am trying to inderstand your point of view but it seems younare trying to say it goes bith ways when it does not by comparison. Even then, those few examples are also wrong and people are wrong to commit those acts. Teachers reported over 2400 acts of bigotry and racism in just three weeks after the election against minorities. This is by far one-sided. Over 900 hate crimes last month alone in the US and the vast majority were against minorities.

Jason says:

There is a real issue brewing among those that throw out the word racism to those that support Trump. I find that sort of rhetoric to be very dangerous and irresponsible. Yes there are people that are racists that support him just like there is racists that don’t support him. Some white people can be racists just the same as people of different colors can be as well. There is bad people in all walks of life. Believe it or not….I know this is going to be tough….but some people are just conservatives that won’t support any party that supports abortion, globalization, big government, a weak military etc…. This is not anything new here people. It’s not the peoples fault that they have only two options. I personally voted for President Trump not because I hate mexicans, muslims or black people but because out of the two nominees my views align more with the Republican party. Again to constantly insinuate that racism was the reason Donald Trump is President is just silly puppetry and continues to try to divide people. Instead having these assumptions all the time and posting it on the internet why don’t people just talk? Have we forgotten how to do that?

Kate says:

Toni,
I completely agree with you. I wish people would take the time to learn about the real trump, as opposed to the villain the media pointed him out to be. He is not racist. He does not have a problem with immigrants even. He just wants them to go through the proper channels and be here legally. Look for a couple great links. One is a video by trump’/ right-hand woman. I can’t recall the posityshe works for him off hand, but she has worked for him for YEARS and is African American. She was choked up with sadness in to response of how people are treating and judging him. He has been nothing but wonderful to her and her family.

Another link- a homeless African American, former boxer. Mr. Trump bought him a few suits and gave him a job, and this was long before he was running for president.

Honestly, I had to really look into him and try to learn who he was bc I wasn’t in live with his arrogance, I was going on old time rumors of him being a womanizer, etc. But when I took the time to figure him out as a family man, a passionate competitive man, I really understood him more. Another great video shows clips of him over the last many decades. He has always been a solid supportive American. I really don’t think he even wanted to run, but felt it was his civil duty. He is a brilliant man, a business minded man like we’ve never had before. I pray and believe he will do great things for us, including minorities and gays. You should see for example his plan for veterans. The health care they receive now is abysmal! He has a wonderful plan he intends to put in place for them that will actually give them access to the physical and mental health care they deserve. No one can change the result so let’s make the best of it. Give him a chance.

Heike says:

Thanks for sharing. I really want to understand further the benefits of trump and downfalls of Hilary. Which crimes did Hillary commit? Email sending? Who did she blame? How do you think trump will get people off government dependencies? Thanks for allowing me to understand better.

Kevin says:

Politics aside, one of the main concerns I have coming out of this election is the ascendency of hatred and intolerance. It is ugly. I am working, at a local level, to promote tolerance. We need to do so, through words and through actions. I urge all who read this to take up the challenge and determine how you can promote tolerance where you live.

Romeldia says:

It’s as if you place all of the pieces of thoughts swimming in my head and connected them to form the 5,000 piece puzzle. Thank you. Very eloquently and simply stated. I shared this post with my Facebook “friends” that seem to remain silent, although they lurk on my page to “get to know” the life I choose to share on Facebook. You hit the nail on the head: “…But may I ask what conversations happened before it escalated to this point? Were you defending Trump and his remarks about minorities? Do you think what he said was wrong? Do you even care? When you were explaining the reasons why you voted for Trump did you fail to mention your distaste for his generalizing Mexicans as rapists and drug dealers? Of course you don’t owe your explanation to anyone, I’m just trying to help explain why your apathetic attitude may come across as acceptance, and why acceptance of this is not ok.”

I had a high school classmate, who has said all of 4 words to me, come to my page to question my “CHRISTIANITY” after another classmate of ours posted “All the true racist came out and voted and the results = Trump.” SHE (white female, who voted for Obama) took personal offense to that statement and said, “how can you call yourself a Christian by calling people racist just because they voted differently from you.” What angered me most is the lack of support to back up her claim that she isn’t a racist. Simply voting for Obama does not let one off the hook for being racist. But you’ve never stood against racism. You’ve never commented, liked, or posted anything that would lead me to believe or come to understand your stance on racism. Many of my high school classmates are silent. I know they are on facebook. I know my posts land on their feed. But yet: CRICKETS.

Toni, my comment is not meant to start an argument or spew venom with you. But not one time in your comments did you even address what Jennifer addressed in this blog. You seem to deflect just as you claim Hillary did. As an African American woman, I am so saddened with your position. I’m also a bit perplexed that you would consider those who voted for Trump “REAL AMERICANS”–when the people that you align with still considers you 3/5ths of a person. They never consider you a REAL AMERICAN. What do you say about the kids chanting in cafeterias “BUILD THAT WALL”? Unbelievable and an actual mockery of all of the things our people fought for in the Civil Rights Movement, including the Freedom Fighters. I missed Trump’s apologies. And it’s so interesting that you’re an expert on media imaging and branding.

Thank you for sharing this Jennifer. I honestly hope we can all continue the dialogue to learn from each other. But more importantly, it’s time to roll up our sleeves and work to fight for what is right. This is not a matter of Black vs. White. This is a matter of Love vs Hate.

angela says:

Thank you Jennifer, i really appreciate your post.

My newsfeed is blowing up with bigotry and hate across the States. I’m deeply sadden by this and hope that this celebration will not last. I don’t care if you are a Trump or Hillary supporter. Full disclosure, I voted for Hillary. Both candidates had policies I was okay with and policies I’m was not okay with. I sided with Hillary, not because of the possibility of being the first female president but because of her message did not carry hateful tones. It strength and standing united. She didn’t encourage violence and hate. Trump on the other had ensued riots at nearly all his rallies. He sent the wrong message to people and encouraging hate, emboldening white supremacist to hurt and dismantle what being American really stands for. United. Acceptance. We had Blacks, Hispanics and Asians fighting American wars. They are your heros. Thank them for their sacrifices.

I’m a minority, born in the State raising 2 girls who are like sponges. They see and hear things outside our protective walls. I would be a failed parent if I supported Trump condoning his message of hate, bigotry and sexist behaviors. It’s not the media’s fault. We should be in control of our own. To correct this, we need Trump to denounce the whitelashing and bigotry that is happening now. Not criticize the people are demonstrating freedom of speech. A college student in Wisconsin beaten and killed because he was from Saudi Arabia, a Hispanic girl denied access to her locker because her fellow classmates formed a wall while chanting make america great again and go back to Mexico, racial slurs and attacks at Asians . If he really wants a change start by sending a message of unity. Reform should begin from within ourselves. To welcome your neighbors and shake hands with them and let’s be equals.

Lovey says:

As a black woman married to a white man living in a racist world…. With friends on both sides of the equation whose love for me I have questioned this whole year, You just spoke my heart. Thank you~

Brian says:

I cannot even begin to describe how closely this mirrors how I feel right now!

Laura says:

Dear Jennifer, as a military spouse from Mexican decent, I am completely heartbroken and fearful of the intended results of this so called “new change” this man brought. Yes lot of individuals are defensive about their vote, I have friends trying to justify their vote for Trump and reassuring me they are not racist. However, I can not understand from my family point of view how could this happend? After 20 years of active service and a few deployments to serious locations, is my family not safe any more? Was my husbands sacrifice and hard work not worth protecting his family back home. Yes I do not have to worry about a deportation, we don’t have to worry about our religious beliefs. But I do fear the mental ambush it has created on our bilingual kids who now fear that being bilingual or speaking Spanish immediately puts them at risk for bullying or now makes them pest of the other side of the wall. My teenagers going through self identify and realizing he/she does not belong or feel welcome on his/her own land because he has strong family roots to the other side of the boarder. Why and how do you justify such identity crisis.
How do you justify your active service and realize that at the end your Mexican roots have a bigger weight on targeting then your military service.

King John says:

Let’s see, Donald J. Trump wins the US Presidency defeating all comers, and I mean everybody including the way left, the far left, the Clinton Machine, the Bush machine, the Neo-cons, the Bankers, the left-wing media, Mitt Romney the latter-day Saint, Racist anarchists, Warren Buffet, Elmo Burt and Ernie, the three Stooges and the Marx Brothers, Communists, Rachel Maddow, the Gay flag, the Mexican flag, LA RAZA, CAIR, The Muslim brotherhood, the Nation of Islam, ISIS, Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, UAE, THE POPE….And you want to bring up this “Can’t we all just get along” CONARD??? I don’t think so…GO TRUMP! DESTROY THIS NEW WORLD ORDER and BRING Christianity BACK to the good old USA….YOU CAN LEAVE if you can find CANADA or Mexico. Thank you and good luck!

Moonsparkle says:

Good post. I agree that it’s important to speak out against racism. I feel like it’s been a weird year! Here in the UK the majority voted for Brexit (to leave the EU). I voted to stay in. Since then there have been reports of an increase in racism and friends and families were divided and now the same thing is happening in the US.

I just read a news story about the Ku Klux Klan realy. It mentioned some of their beliefs too, such as being against race mixing. And apparently lots of youths these days are having “mongrel children”! I’m mixed race and that is quite a horrible term to use. Also it is horrible to think that people oppose your existence!

I enjoy reading your blog, Jennifer and just wanted to say I support you and keep speaking out. 🙂
Moonsparkle recently posted..Healing Health Anxiety- Part 1My Profile

Ericka Katz says:

Thank you for this blog. I have friends who have said Donald Trump is a good man and all of his comments are taken out of context? Are you kidding me? How do you respond to that?

Amy says:

I typically do not comment on things such as this. However what you have written should be splattered all over every newspaper and spoken across every television. You are so dead-on accurate in your assessments of this. God bless you and your family!

Jeremy says:

Nice respectful read Jennifer!
I appreciate your words and I will try to follow your lead. I voted for Johnson much to the dismay of my Liberal friends who kept telling me it was a wasted vote and a vote for Trump. Trump was my second choice. I think Trump is an egotistical misogynist who accidentally finds himself as the President Elect. He isn’t quite as awful as the left is painting him to be but he just isn’t a great human being. I thought the same of George Bush Jr by the way… Anyway, I believe that when Trump entered the race, 1/2 his intentions were sincerely meant to buck the status quo. The other 1/2 was ego mixed with marketing. What Trump didn’t realize, along with the Democrats, the Republicans, & the media, was just how strong the protest vote was going to be. No signs in yards no bumper stickers, just a seething ocean of disgruntled people waiting to strike. It surprised the entire Republican Primary field, the press and eventually Hillary Clinton. My following opinion is backed up the vote itself.
White America voted for Donald Trump so in part there is some racism attached to the outcome of this election but not as much as you think. That being said, it’s awful hard to not say the same regarding Barack Obama’s path to the Whitehouse. The pigment in his skin alone was one of the top driving forces among black voters to put him in office. You can’t Possibly say it wasn’t looking at the numbers. Before you get angry, I like Obama and think he is an admirable man who means well and always tried his best. However, in an effort to bring equality and justice to the black community he inadvertently alienated a lot of the white community, particularly the ones who voted for him, the middle class. You may disagree with me but again, the election numbers & results tell the story.

For someone like me and many others like me, we were fed up with politicians who said one thing but did another. Ones who promised one thing which would help us but the end results hurt us (Obamacare being a prime example). We had tried for years to vote on character and policy only to be duped by well intentioned candidates who turned into bought & paid for politicians. Hillary Clinton embodied the meaning of status quo, bought & paid for Washington politician. Her lies and corruption kept bubbling over as hard as she tried to tamp it down. Even if Trump was everything people said he was, at least he wasn’t a Washington insider corrupt politician. The perfect storm was brewing… Political correctness was/is at an all time high. White male has become a dirty word, Barack Obama had broken the white middle classes back with Obamacare rates and awful coverage and Hillary was offering up 4 more years of the same. People were so starved for someone who had the balls to tell everyone F-U that they were willing to put up with anyone with a pulse who would do it. Remember that Barack Obama got voted in office by a large percentage of white Americans so their anger wasn’t directed at race it was directed at “Washington”. The Republican Primary field was filled with arrogant party line candidates who were too blind to see what Republican voters wanted. Once trump got past the Primary, voters had to come to grips with the human being he was. They had to make a gut-wrenching decision to either look past his character or lack there of, or vote for what they absolutely despise. The vote wasn’t for racism or bigotry or misogyny, it was for “I can’t take it any longer! America decided, I’ll take my chances with this piece of work as long as he with give the middle finger to the Washington elites. This election was all about giving the biggest FU vote to Washington in the history of American politics.

Hillary Clinton may have more decorum than Trump by a long shot but she represented everything that was wrong with American politics and that seething ocean of forgotten voters who had been on the sidelines for 8 years saw their opportunity to strike and they took it. Trump was/is nothing more than the unwitting vehicle which got them there. Now that he is actually going to be the President, all his voters along with the ones who didn’t vote for him, are waiting and praying he lasts 4 years without doing something really stupid or embarrassing for the United States. It’s pretty pathetic for sure. Racist? sure there are some of his voters who are backwater hillbilly racists. Those people will always be around. However, most of Trumps voting base being racist etc? not as much as you think.
Jeremy recently posted..To My Friends Who Voted for Trump & Claim They Aren’t RacistMy Profile

I won’t debate you on if Trump is a racist or not. But I will say his election makes a lot of people who ARE racist think they now have a green light to insult, threaten and physically attack minorities as they have been longing to do for years.

Election night someone I love was threatened by a man wearing a hood and brandishing a gun. The next day a friend was stopped by a cop for no reason and told the election had “Put you in your place.” That same day my grandchild , who is a store clerk, was asked by one female customer, “Well, how do you think you’re going to enjoy the next four years?” Another white female just called her a nigger. There have been incidents like this all over the country; Muslim women attacked and their hijabs snatched off, gay men beat bloody, Hispanic kids told they were going to be kicked out of the country by their classmates until the children were in tears. BTW, many of these kids that were taunted ARE American citizens.

Who are these people to turn to for help? Cops who have been killing and mistreating minorities for years with no reprisal? Let me say right here that I know MOST cops are not like that. But what of the ones who are?

I’m a 65-year-old Black woman. I’m afraid of guns and have never owned one, but I’m going to get one now. I’m going to get it legally and learn how to use it and carry it in my purse. Why? Because I feel like I have a target on my back.

Personally, I think Trump IS a bigot, but I will reserve judgement until I see what he’s going to do as President to help those citizens whose basic rights–including the MOST basic right, the right to stay alive–are be treated as though they have no rights at all. Frankly, I don’t think Trump is going to do a damn thing about it because I don’t think he gives a damn about it. But I certainly hope he proves me wrong.

Tiff says:

This reminds me of a video on youtube by Prince EA it’s called” I am not black, you are not white” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0qD2K2RWkc

MM says:

Jennifer,
Thanks for your candid thoughts. As a white, Mormon woman who grew up in the South, it’s great to read new perspectives on our great country. I grew up hearing the “n-word” frequently but haven’t heard it spoken in years. It’s not allowed in my home, nor are other disrespectful, hateful labels.

I did vote for Trump, after fasting and prayer. Hillary was never an option for me due to Benghazi, lying under oath, hypocrisy and corruption. Trump is no where near perfect but I’m hopeful he surrounds himself with good people.

I’m sorry you’re worried and concerned. I’m sorry latinos and Muslims and blacks in America are scared. And I’m angry at the stupidity displayed on both sides, complaining protestors and ignorant racists alike.

I am more than that. I am better than that and I’m teaching my children better, as well. Only through open, honest and respectful communication can gaps be bridged and our society improved.

ar says:

Did anyone else pick up on the author’s own prejudice? “…my pulse quickens when a lifted pickup truck passes by…”

Why is that exactly?

Brian says:

Sheesh, it honestly feels like people are too busy coming to Trump’s defense as opposed to reading her article and taking it in. Just like Ari stated, it’s about some of his followers spewing and bringing hate to the forefront. No one said anything about Blacks or any other minority not being racist, we know that there are some. But they aren’t going around in the numbers that trump supporters are with threats and hateful chants in the same capacity. So please, before you comment, please read her blog to its entirety and try to understand where she is coming from.

Manny says:

I feel kinda awkward to meddle into this that is not my country for I am and currently live in Venezuela. We are still suffering from a hate speech instigated 17 years ago by the late President Chavez. Don’t make our same mistake of remaining silent when it all started, speak now and maybe you won’t have to regret it later as we do now in Venezuela. Love is a powerful thing but hate is it also. Stop now and reconsider your confortable silence.

Kerri says:

My hope is that others begin to understand the critical need to acknowledge the reality of this right now. It truly seems that people feel that the two are not connected, that they could vote for one, without having endorsed the other. This can only be possible if all begin to speak loudly their intolerance to every act of discrimination.

Americans are “tiring” of the political conversation without understanding that that is a luxury that an enormous portion of our population no longer has, and really never fully had. As they are rolling their eyes and using sarcasm to minimize the full scope of what is rising, our neighbors are stepping out in fear. This election we voted yes to a man that denigrated our fellow man as a significant portion of his platform. Had he not, our conversation today may be different.

Thank you for articulating so beautifully what is in my heart. ❤️

Joanie says:

My first choice was Dr. Ben Carson, because I think he is Brilliant. My 2nd choice was actually Bernie. (I don’t vote party, I vote people) I also voted for Obama. That being said, I am a NICU nurse which means I save premature babies, it is not just my job, it is my passion. I have also saved “failed” abortions. So when Hillary said she was for late term abortions, which is murder as they can live outside the womb. She lost my vote. I had and I say “had” a good friend who happens to be black (this normally wouldn’t and shouldn’t need to be mentioned). When I wrote on my page, The above and explained Hillary lost my vote. She called me up and asked if I was going to vote Trump, I said he has my vote over her right now. She said “wow, we have been friends for 37 years “(YES, THIRTY SEVEN) “and I just find out you’re a racist bigot.I can’t believe all we and our children have done together. We are no longer friends”. She hung up and has blocked me from calling her, seeing her facebook, will not return any messages ( if she’s getting them). So no, I didn’t get a chance to explain to her, the things I truly don’t like about his character and things he said, and how they were or how they could be interpreted. Or how the presidency is not a dictatorship and the Congress and American people will stop his bad ideas. My hope is he surrounds himself with good people who can help him inderstand how he is interpreted (if that’s the issue ) or how he needs to re evaluate how he thinks about diversity.

Shannon says:

Hillary supporters are violently rioting and calling your husband a racist, and you think it’s Trump supporters who have a character problem?

Anna says:

No offense but it took you way too long to get to your point and I’m not sure you even have one. Building the wall is not about race, nothing about Trump’s platform is about race. If you think that’s what it’s about then you need to actually listen to others and what they are feeling about the greatness of our country and why we want to protect that. Righteous people in the Book of Mormon built walls to protect their lands. That’s all it is. It’s offensive to have fellow Mormons think otherwise.

Maria says:

<3 Thank you for speaking out and speaking your mind. I did not vote for him (I didn't vote for Clinton either) and while I might have been "throwing my vote away" I couldn't, in good conscience, vote for him.

Jack T says:

I wanted to share this with those concerned about the protests. There are questions we should ask ourselves, together. For example: the Portland protest was peaceful, and then two days later, parts were not.

Why did suddenly peaceful people turn violent? We must search ourselves, and search for answers as to why this is so. When I watched the videos prior, the body language of protestors was nonviolent, and was slow-moving.

I researched, and searched, and listened to what the officers reporting had to say. Until then, things had been peaceful.

Today, I found this: https://www.gofundme.com/portlands-resistance-rebuild-fund?ssid=800699851&pos=1

Other reports are coming in that it was a splinter group. The above link is from the main, and seeks to gather funds to help out any small businesses who were harmed. There is an email.

Painting eachother with a broad brush is harmful, and prevents us from seeing into the hearts of others.

Jack T says:

To the folks concerned about the protests:

Watching earlier videos shows protestors’ body language to be slow-moving, and non-violent. The police accounts I listened to referred to that. So why after two days of peaceful nonviolence, was there a change?

So what happened? We should ask.

Folks, there is a GFM out there by the main protest group in Portland. They are putting together funds to help out any small businesses that were hurt; there is an email to contact them. They’ve also disclaimed the splinter group.

I am tired from this week, so tired. I’ve tried to submit this a few times. This is my final attempt.
Jack T recently posted..To My Friends Who Voted for Trump & Claim They Aren’t RacistMy Profile

Kate says:

Mine does to. It’s due to experience. I have twice had vehicles swerve towards me as though trying to hit me when I was in a crosswalk – lifted pickups. I once had a cup of coffee thrown out the window at me while I was walking on the sidewalk – lifted pickup. I have had terrible sexist things yelled at me many times as I was doing my shopping going from store to store downtown, including someone who used c**t aimed at me, then at my young daughter. I haven’t kept count, but 8 out of 10 times, probably, lifted pickups. Welcome to being a woman in America, a place where a big truck makes some men feel like they have a right to behave however they want.

Alison says:

Wow, must hurt. Minorities everywhere can most definitely understand how you feel being judged because of your skin color.

Nancy Daily says:

Because I am a white Mormon woman from the south I am automatically a white racist, thanks to Hillary and the media anyway. But if I am a white, female, Mormon, racists from the south; what about my white, Mormon, southern, sister from another mother? She has adopted 10 kids of mixed races and colors and she also voted for Trump….The hate speech is from Hillary, the whining liberals and the press corps, who edit and re-edit everything Trump has ever said hoping no one will listen to the unedited version or look at his history with people of color. How about all those people of color who voted for Trump, I suppose they too are racists and deplorable, or black predators who need to be brought to heel? The deplorable, predators who need to be brought to heel is Hillary and the Clinton Gang of thieves (including the media).

Amy says:

Why can you laugh when Clinton supporters call your husband a racist? Is it because he’s proven to you that he’s not one by marrying a black woman? Do all white people have to prove to you that they’re not racist? My friends that voted for Clinton don’t have to prove they’re not lying, corrupt baby killers. And my friends that voted for Trump don’t have to prove they’re not xenophobic, homophobic bigots.

Vicki says:

I am a white female with three grown kids and six grandkids . With the exception of my daughter -in-law, who was adopted in Mexico from an orphanage by a wealthy white family, my family is all white. I have many close friends of all races, cultures and religous or spiritual beliefs. I love that America is becoming more and more diverse. I am also an Independent. I’ve voted Relublican, Democrat and I voted for Ross Perot. I was raised Christian but chose spirituality and embrace the goodness that most all religions of the world share. Most people have little knowledge of the religions they attack… It’s fear which is the basis of all bigotry. I see people fitting into three types of racists:
Those who are openly racists
Those who are ‘closet’ racists
Those who don’t see themselves as racists ( the Archie Bunker types)

This election has brought all three types to the forefront, exposing the sad realization that we as a Nation have not come as far as many of us had hoped. It’s really sobering and I think the our wonderful President Obama has brought this to a head. Maybe that is a good thing because we have to deal with it before we can ever really come together. I will never be able to wrap my head around the ignorance and the cruelty of bigotry no matter if it’s race , gender or sexual preference. It certainly isn’t what Jesus taught folks. I’m also going to say that if you voted for Trump you are a racist. There is no way to separate him and racism. Period. So if you voted for him you know which category you fit.

Jen says:

Same thing, people posting just to defend Trump. For goodness sakes, listen! The first thing I am is black. I didn’t decide that, it’s simply how it is. When I walk into a room the first thing people see is a person who’s black. Second, I am a woman, then I am many more things that you find out once you talk to me. Some of my friends helped to elect a man who I personally believe is racist to president of the country I have lived in my whole life and worked in my whole adult life. I believe this based on things I have heard him say with my own ears. To follow that, he’s said things that leave me to believe he’s sexist, misogynistic, homophobic and a bully. Now if the tapes were altered, perhaps he should tell us and show us that. It is plain hurtful that people who I thought loved me thinks it’s OK to make me call him President. So now he’s going to be president and I am concerned but instead of caring about my feelings, they want me to just shut up about it. Well I have shut up and shut down and friendships are being lost because how could they?? Hate is the worst thing to me, no real friend would ever discount what I am feeling with “hate isn’t great but it’s better than Hillary”.

Ramona Lowe says:

If you voted for Trump–for whatever reason–you may not be racist, but you are okay with racism.

Jeff Scott says:

So ridiculous. In other words, if you voted for Hillary, then you might not cheat on your spouse but you’re okay with your spouse cheating on you. Do you have to SHARE every attribute of someone to support them?

Baby Making Mama says:

Of course not. I think you’re looking at this a little too politically Jeff. This isn’t about Hillary vs Trump, it’s about standing together for those who are marginalized no matter who is in power. I hope you’ll join us.

Bryan says:

There are horrible, hate filled people in every race. I’m sure you’ve seen this with your husband being in law enforcement.

https://youtu.be/djx3T9IEc1A

Equal says:

Racism is coming from all sides and I fear for our children’s futures.

Matthew Hilliard says:

Even though you didn’t vote on race, its a package deal and you have to own all of it.

Matthew Hilliard says:

I have a serious question for the author – though I know the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints has as official policy that races are equal its not that long ago that black skin was seen as the mark of Cain. Do any of those feelings persist in church life?

Phil says:

A huge number of people that are white and voted for Obama, now voted for trump. People are very hopeful for an improved economy with better jobs/affordable health care and controlled immigration/fiscal responsibility with no ties to special interest and not into late term abortion. Could it be your life experience has left you with s jaundice view of the human heart that has made you gullible to swallow whole the characterization the Clinton campaign painted of mr trump, and blind to the manipulations the the left uses to create/extort our differences and “special interests” to their own purposes, but with little to show for it. The naïveté is understandable as life teaches us more each decade, and you are younger than you think, but you are taking an elitist, judgmental, and somewhat arrogant tone which is no more enlightened than the baser attributes you condemn in your political foe. Racism is nothing like it has been, but keep sticking people in the eye and calling it love will be much more divisive than waving a flag, and not valuing other citizens life experience and their own fears, as you accuse of them because you are the enlightened one, makes you a bore to one who has heard the rhetoric before but lived to listen to the flip side of the record. Stay tuned- you might see things get better.

Jesus says:

Joanie,
Where did you get you info? Hillary was in favor of the Woman’s choice in case of health concerns or death of the Mother. She NEVER said she was in favor of late term abortions. Curious if you researched this? Sad you’re a supposedly RN, but can’t determine Faux news or their sites while not researching it on an Independent research site. SMH

Alannah Kavanagh Auel says:

I didn’t want to read and NOT comment. I’m commenting only to send you love and strength. I am not black. I am not LDS. I do not know what it is to live as a minority. But I know, as you probably do too, that despite our differences, we are probably more alike than we know. And that is why we know that a vote for Trump means supporting his campaign of hatred, racism, abuse and intolerance. No matter what he “promises” to do for America, he has already proven that he is intolerant and abusive to anyone who isn’t white, privileged and male. And therefore I stand WITH YOU. Blessings to you and your family.

Ginger Winship says:

This is perfect. Thank you.

AuntyA says:

I think the true crux of this story is if you claim that you voted for Trump for reasons other than the racist rhetoric that followed his campaign, we need to hear your voices to denounce these hateful actions that are occurring around the country and call on your leader that you voted in to do the same. If you are quiet, you are complacent and part of the problem.

Aletha says:

Toni I’m going to pray for you. Your reality is not mine by any stretch of the imagination.

Cassandra Aline Jones, PhD says:

Toni,
All Republicans are not racists, but EVERY RACIST VOTED FOR DONALD TRUMP. Your vote for him as an African American says that you agree with and support the racist and divisive policies which Donald Trump welcomes and will enforce. This makes you a very sad, fickled, uninformed, tunnel-visioned, and dangerous citizen. You will be one of the many who will be shocked by how LITTLE your candidate accomplishes………….

Someone says:

Why specifically does a lifted pickup scare you more than other vehicles? Is it because only rednecks drive them? And rednecks are all racist?

David Bradshaw says:

This is what I posted on Facebook to a cousin who had posted this on Facebook:
———-
I agree with a few of her points, but I mostly disagree for the following reasons:
1. My well educated, devout Mormon, critically thinking adult children voted for Jill Stein, Gary Johnson, Evan McMullin, Hilary Clinton, and Donald Trump. None of them owe an explanation/justification/rationalization to anyone for any reason explaining why they voted their conscience for any given candidate.
2. The actions of “the few” on either side, should not be used to define “the whole,” as that is entirely inaccurate. Otherwise it is like me visiting China and being labeled as a felon, because there are felons who live in America. So I’m not sure that I understand her point about Trump supporters needing to being any more vigilant against racism than they currently are. Is she suggesting that they need to do so to prove that they are not racist???
3. Hiring managers should be able to hire the best candidate for any given position without feeling pressured to base their decision on race, gender, religion, etc., or being subsequently harassed for who they chose. Trump was running for a job, and American citizens were the hiring managers. While 60% of the people who voted for him said that they found him personally distasteful, they clearly beleived that he was the most qualified applicant for the job.
Isn’t diversity and civil discourse a great thing within families and extended families (i.e., cousins)? An important part of that civility is 1) defending citizens right to vote, 2) respecting their choice/passion/conscience as valuable as our own, and 3) living with the outcome and moving forward both individually and as a country.

David Bradshaw says:

Why are you not under a similar obligation to explain why you voted for an evil and criminally corrupt Hilary Clinton?

“If you are quiet, you are complacent and part of the problem.” Do you really believe this? There is a reason that voting occurs in private, and no one needs to explain why they voted their conscience.

Ron says:

Its not about race. Middle class Americans and middle America voted for Trump because they”ve been neglected for too long. You’re going to keep losing these elections until you realize this. Insulting half the country by calling them racists, xenophobes, homophobes and mysogonists is childish and foolish. Its a losing strategy you”re alienating half tje country.

Brenda says:

I have a couple things to point out. In this article the focus is equality and standing up against racism, yet you wrote you are afraid when you see a specific type of truck. Isn’t that doing the same thing you are speaking out against? Also you should realize millions of Christians struggled with their vote, myself included. Do I vote for the man who says horrible things about certain races and women or do I vote for the woman who thinks its OK to kill babies at full term? Both are bad choices, but in the end I chose to support our unborn children, who seem to have no rights in this country. This does not mean I am racist, or support racist remarks. I do not post memes or make silly comments on social media. Nor do I gloat about the candidate I support. I should not have to defend my choice and I am sorry you feel that way.

Ashley Smith says:

I so agree with you Jen! Thank you for posting this. I have not unfriended any of my friends that support Trump but it does make me shake my head when I see them posting about “violent” protests and riots yet they ignore racist incidences that have happened in the last week. It is disheartening.

Colby says:

Jennifer,

Consider this:

I am unsure you realize how discriminatory the title of your website is. “BabyMakingMachine” is an affront to all those out there who struggle with infertility. Maybe you should rethink how you flaunt your fertility, and how you think you are so much better than a family who is forced to adopt because their bodies don’t work like yours. Did you even stop to think of how much pain the name of your website causes infertile families?? Did you consider the pain of countless miscarriages and failed in-vetro attempts that is triggered by your thoughtless webpage title. Who cares if you can have your own biological children? And you voted for a woman who supports the aborting of perfectly viable babies! Maybe YOUR actions should speak louder than words.

If you have read this far – congratulations. This rant is brought to you by TRAUMA. You obviously have a lot of pain of past traumatic experiences with racism. I applaud your willingness to get your message out there, and you have some valid points. You have a beautiful family – and my wife can attest to the difficulties associated with being married to a cop (now former State Trooper).

Yes, I voted for Trump. I cringe when I hear of his escapades, and his attitudes toward certain cultures. I did not vote for him because of his several deficiencies. I voted for him in hopes that he will be able to tackle the most pressing issue facing the USA and the future my children are entering – the national debt. The economy will come crashing down if the national debt is not wrangled in, and at that point it will not matter who is racist or bigoted – because fear will overtake even the nicest of people – as it has overtaken you. Trump is the best choice to take care of our debt.

Just in case you missed it – the purpose of my beginning rant was to open your eyes a little to how trauma can affect ones perception as it has yours. Go get counseling. Your pain not only comes out here, but it will affect your relationship with your husband and your beautiful children.

Your website is a cute idea. Please tell your husband to be safe out there and to remember his training.

Colby
Husband to One Beautiful Woman
Father to Six Amazing Children
Mental Health Counselor
Attachment and Trauma Specialist

Steven says:

I shared your post on Facebook with the following comment. So far I have had lots of positive comments/likes and one hateful comment back. The guy did not even read your blogpost.

To all my Facebook friends…

Following the election I have tried to remain quiet about the election results and tried to sum up what just happened and what is currently happening across our country.

No matter who you voted for, please read this post…especially if you voted for Trump. This is the best articulation of how many across this country feel, especially if you are a minority. For those of us who are a minority, I am a gay white man married to a gay Latino man, we know what discrimination looks and sounds like, we know what intimidation feels like, and we know what violence is to our community.

What is most upsetting about this election is not the results but what it has unleashed upon our nation. I thought we were better than this! So much hate and intolerance….the Klan openly marching in the daylight, school children taunting other with “build the wall” and numerous acts of violence against those who are different or perceived to “not belong” in this country. Aren’t we better than this? Have we as a nation not evolved at least a little over the last 200+ years? Aren’t we better than this as a nation?

To all my Facebook friends, no matter your political affiliation….if you are not speaking out against the treatment of minorities, how do you expect me to know that you are not a ______.

KJ says:

Look ma’am, you’re argument is appropriate for both sides of the political spectrum. Racism exists on the left too. My nephew who has white skin and red hair was harassed so badly by middle eastern kids at his elementary school that my sister and her husband changed his school because he was showing signs of depression. When you see an eight year old black kid at a protest holding a sign that says ‘Fuck Donald Trump’ it makes you scratch your head. A white girl close to where I live was beat up at school by a black girl because she said ‘I hope Trump wins’ on her Instgram (there’s a viral video of it you can watch). I can go on and on giving you examples of racism perpetrated against conservatives at any age level. The real point here is that it’s not okay for people to use such broad strokes in stereotyping half of the country. Half of the country didn’t vote for Trump because they are racist, misogynist, and sexist. They voted for the man because they want the American dream: a good job and a safe place to raise their family. I haven’t been called a racist directly to my face, but I’m sure inside people have said it about me. You can’t lump everyone into basket like Hillary did. That would make it okay for me to make comments like “if you supported Hillary then you’re a criminal” or “if you voted Democrat then you are okay with rape.” I wouldn’t say that because I am more intelligent than that. It’s naive and irresponsible to do so. And people that are or who are NOT saying anything about it are part of the problem not the solution. The media is perpetrating this message of hate and they too are a gross problem. So I can’t agree with your stance. I can agree with your right to speak your mind, I can sympathize with the hardships you’ve endured, and I can extend a hand to someone in need, but to stand by and be silent would be a disservice to my integrity.

Steven says:

Great blogpost! I shared your post on Facebook with the following comment. So far I have received many likes/positive comments and only one hate-filled comment from a guy who did not even bother to read your blogpost.

To all my Facebook friends…

Following the election I have tried to remain quiet about the election results and tried to sum up what just happened and what is currently happening across our country.

No matter who you voted for, please read this post…especially if you voted for Trump. This is the best articulation of how many across this country feel, especially if you are a minority. For those of us who are a minority, I am a gay white man married to a gay Latino man, we know what discrimination looks and sounds like, we know what intimidation feels like, and we know what violence is to our community.

What is most upsetting about this election is not the results but what it has unleashed upon our nation. I thought we were better than this! So much hate and intolerance….the Klan openly marching in the daylight, school children taunting other with “build the wall” and numerous acts of violence against those who are different or perceived to “not belong” in this country. Aren’t we better than this? Have we as a nation not evolved at least a little over the last 200+ years? Aren’t we better than this as a nation?

To all my Facebook friends, no matter your political affiliation….if you are not speaking out against the treatment of minorities, how do you expect me to know that you are not a ______.

Brandy Lydy says:

Thank you for this. I often feel like I do not know how to best put what I feel into words. You have and I appreciate your honesty.

Laura says:

Shauna, I agree with you. It was what Trump said that made me choose not to vote for him, not how the media portrayed him.

KJ says:

Look ma’am, you’re argument is appropriate for both sides of the political spectrum. Racism exists on the left too. My nephew who has white skin and red hair was harassed so badly by middle eastern kids at his elementary school that my sister and her husband changed his school because he was showing signs of depression. When you see an eight year old black kid at a protest holding a sign that says ‘Fuck Donald Trump’ it makes you scratch your head. A white girl close to where I live was beat up at school by a black girl because she said ‘I hope Trump wins’ on her Instagram (there’s a viral video of it you can watch). I can go on and on giving you examples of racism perpetrated against conservatives at any age level. The real point here is that it’s not okay for people to use such broad strokes in stereotyping half of the country. Half of the country didn’t vote for Trump because they are racist, misogynist, and sexist. They voted for the man because they want the American dream: a good job and a safe place to raise their family. I haven’t been called a racist directly to my face, but I’m sure inside people have said it about me. You can’t lump everyone into basket like Hillary did. That would make it okay for me to make comments like “if you supported Hillary then you’re a criminal” or “if you voted Democrat then you are okay with rape.” I wouldn’t say that because I am more intelligent than that. It’s naive and irresponsible to do so. And people that are or who are NOT saying anything about it are part of the problem not the solution. The media is perpetrating this message of hate and they too are a gross problem. So I can’t agree with your stance. I can agree with your right to speak your mind, I can sympathize with the hardships you’ve endured, and I can extend a hand to someone in need, but to stand by and be silent would be a disservice to my integrity.

Anne V. says:

The occult?

TB says:

I voted TRUMP. I voted for Clintons in the past, but just got worn out of the Clintons and their scandals and denial of wrong doing. Seems like the more they deny a problem, the more trouble they get into, and then are getting into because of them. I really am concerned about our economy and our deficit and terrorism. I really like personal accountability and I hope nothing bad happens to Lesbians, Gays, Minorities, etc. I just don’t like the constant accusation of wrong doing and no accountability for wrong doing…Benghazi, Wikileaks, now Clinton Foundation…it just goes on and on and on. Seems the Clintons feel wayyyyy above the law. Trump said wrong things, but Clintons DID wrong things, and I felt that was worse. You can say all the right things, but never do the right things…and that in itself is a problem for me. I know the man needs a muzzle. But at least he was willing to take a stand. We’ll see who is right/wrong in time.

Jen says:

Thank you so much for this thoughtful, articulate blog. Your graceful, positive response to Trump voters who are offended by the racist appellation gave me something I can use with those in my family who are in that camp. I have so much fear and anxiety about the days ahead and the hatred that’s been unleashed, for all of us.

The media did not makeup the storie, it came out of Trumps mouth, where have you been.
America, you are full of shit! Stop trying to cover up this coup. Stop making excuses and trying to sweep this shit under the rug. Drumpf did not win because people are unsatisfied with the establishment. He did not win because he understands the plight of the disenfranchised. He did not win because he is not part of the elites. I don’t think anyone who voted for him truly believed that this idiot can make the necessary changes that would “make America great again.”
He won because he is a white supremacist and his only success that he has the ability to bring out the worst in all the other racists and bigots, whom, by the way, are alive and living in the majority of the United States of America. America, I hope you get what you voted for. I hope he grabs you by the pussy and fucks you over! Just being real. I won’t even apologize for the language, you elected the biggest potty mouth on earth!- Donna George.

Will Hirsch says:

People may not have voted for Trump’s racist statements, but, if they voted for him, they did support a racist. Supporting a racist aids and abeds a racist and makes one a defacto racist as well. Sorry for that little fact but it is what it is. Not liking Hillary doesn’t make voting for a racist okay. Believing the garbage that the media spread in the endless free air time they gave Trump and his racist statments also isn’t any excuse. The sad fact is, the very people who voted for him are likely to be exactly the people most hurt by his policies. They’ve been had but want so badly for some daddy figure to make things all better. Sad to know what’s coming for them. I can’t say that I think our current Democratic leaders are much better. They’ve been totally clueless to how the people in areas like the rust belt have been hurt. They have been tied to the monied interests of Wall Street, as has Trump and don’t get it. Unfortunately, their old decent paying jobs are never coming back. The corporations wouldn’t stand for the hit that would put on their bottom line. And their children’s health care will now be going away as well. Social security? Turned over to bankers in the private sector to make yet more profits and we all know how well that has worked in the past. No, from now on, as unpleasant as it might be, I’m calling people out who think it’s okay to judge or denegrate someone by the color of their skin, their religious beliefs, or the country of their birth. If you supported a racist, you supported racism. That pretty much is the definition of being a racist. Now they get to own that label, like it or not. Tough. They’ve earned it.

momsaid says:

You are mistaken about the words and actions of the President-Elect. His remarks about ‘Mexicans’ were about illegals that the Mexican gov’t SENDS here. If you are unaware of the instruction booklets found along the border and in the possession of illegals, please look them up. They are in comic book form, and show what to say and where to go, to get free gov’t benefits. The per capita crime rate of ‘undocumenteds’ is higher, as is dependency. The opposite is true of legal immigrants. Trump has said, repeatedly, that he wants LEGAL immigration. Each of the accusations leveled at him can be negated by listening to/reading what the man actually said.

SeoulDoc says:

Hmm. So Hillary and the media misrepresented Donald to you, but Donald and the media didn’t misrepresent Hillary to you? Alas, you’ve given an example of the word “discrimination”:
the practice of unfairly treating a person or group of people differently from other people or groups of people

momsaid says:

I saw and read and heard what and who Hillary is for decades before this election. Her Evita Peron-like overhaul of Arkansas schools (higher taxes, lower test scores); Rose Law Firm hire *right after!* her husband was elected AG, then made a Partner *right after!* her husband was elected Governor; Cattle futures investments that ALL went her way; broken condoms distributed to schools by her good friend Joycelyn Elders; Madison Guaranty and Whitewater (oops! can’t find those subpoenaed papers!); the Bimbo Eruption Squad; the White House Travel Office debacle; ‘HillaryCare’; the incineration of 75 people in Waco, TX, ordered by her good friend Janet Reno; screwing up the Easter Egg Roll in 1993; covering for her husband with false ‘Vast, Right-Wing Conspiracy’ claims; stealing $200K of goods from the White House as they moved out; Carpet Bagging in New York, to run for Senate; using her State Department job as a money-making venture (and leaving our men to die); and finally, having the gaul to accuse Trump of misogyny!

Sorry you missed all that.

john doe says:

The entire article is about racism and Trump being a racist. What a stupid article. The election wasn’t about race woman. People voted who they thought would be the best candidate to improve this country, not who’s racist and who isn’t. It’s already been proven that Trump isn’t racist. He does support deporting illegals who are criminals and that’s why people hate him. They view him as a racist when he’s not one. If he was so racist why was his first three people selected in his panel a woman, a gay man and a black man? That’s right you can’t deny these facts. Where is his entire white racist panel?

Alex says:

Thanks for sharing this article. I’m a white Christian woman who voted for Gary Johnson. I couldn’t in good conscience vote for Trump nor Hillary because I did not believe them to be of strong moral fiber. That said, I do support some of Trump’s policies. My husband owns a small business and could not afford health insurance for himself or an employee due to Obamacare. This means it was harder to retain good workers, so he has ended up working 7 days a week for much of this year to stay afloat. Trump supports small businesses and I hope he will put policies in place to help business owners and employees. Because of Trump, we have the opportunity to better support our gay son and my husband’s business partner who is an immigrant. But I agree that we need to hold Trump accountable for his words and that people need to call him out and take an active stand against racism. He is better than that. We are better than that.

Doug says:

I think your comment misses the point. She is talking about being silent about the multitude of racist hateful acts that have taken place since the election.
They have taken place with Trump’s name attached to them. I think what she is looking for is simply to acknowledge these horrible acts for what they are without taking it as a personal attack on your voting choice.

Claudia Hain says:

I couldn’t have said it better and believe me I have tried to. The people from either party who are out there carrying on all these devastating shenanigans are the fringe of any group; they do not represent the majority of either party they are just the ones that get their selves televised. The remaining of us that are still level headed must take the reins and lead the way to unity as Americans of our great country.

J says:

Thank you for saying all I have been feeling, but could not say with such eloquence and without spewing the anger I feel. I belong to a religious minority and worry what is going to happen, after this vitriolic election, to all of the typically chosen recipients of hatred.

Travis says:

Interesting read. I’m very intrigued by the whole thing. Which do you find more frustrating, the Trump supporting faction, that you know does not care about racism, pretending to be offended by the accusations of racism so that they can marginalize your unique feelings that they will never understand? Or the people that either excuse his behavior at every turn and say it’s because black lives matter is more racist? I’m a fellow Texan and I really hope things improve for you here, I am white but it isn’t hard to see what you’re saying you see is very grounded. I just wish his supporters would say something like “yeah he seems a little racist and that’s not ideal I guess, I mean it doesn’t hurt me any lol so… but I really didn’t support him because of that, I did it because he has an R next to his name and I’m mindless about this whole thing so that’s what I do.” Instead of trying to pretend the racism isn’t there. I also find it almost funny how these people committing the hate crimes and see the Trump win as a validation of xenophobia and all that stuff are thinking that the country has shown solidarity with that behavior even though the country in fact did not support Trump and the victory is only because the Electoral College system has been warped into something that goes against the will of the people. Good luck Jennifer, I hope the people of Texas surprise you going forward. In a good way, that is.

Adam W says:

I find it difficult, even though pointless, to not argue with anti-trump citizens. First I admit that he has been a sexist in his past. However many people have taken things he has said way out of context simply because they have made up their mind that they hate Trump. He never ‘generalized’ Mexicans as rapists and murderers. He simply stated that illegal Mexican aliens committed those crimes and that is one of the many reasons to build a wall. Those are facts not opinions. But those of you looking for a reason heard a generalization. And for argument’s sake, let’s agree that all the candidates were not ideal… do you honestly feel that someone that has shown an increasing disregard for the law, because she continues to get away with it, a better suited president? Imagine what she will be capable of doing when she occupies the single most powerful position in the world. That scared me more than any racist, bigot would. She supports full term abortion, the ACA (which while helping some, is bankrupting many more) and she magnifies the quintessential ‘politician’ persona that they are all corrupt, lying, self-serving people. Is that who you really want in that position? I don’t understand how people can’t see that she is the bigger threat to this country.

Brian V Hunt says:

Jennifer,

Beautiful article, beautiful family. I can’t believe you would think for one second that anything in your article could be interpreted as “overreaction.” If anything, your entire tone is conciliatory and kind. I’m exhausted from the stubborn persistence of white people who cannot walk for one second in the shoes of people of color and see what their everyday experience is. And I’m an old white guy!

All the best.

Kelly says:

Then why has he not said anything to address those who are committing hate crimes in his name? Why has he not said “hey KKK, Do not march in my name, I do not agree with what you are doing!” Or “hey, stop doing hate crimes in my name!” He has never had trouble speaking up before, holding his tongue is not his problem. His silence right now speaks volumes.

scared white girl says:

Thank you Toni, for putting into words exactly how I feel. I wonder too, if Hilary had won, what kind of ‘gloating’ and name calling would be going on. In addition, I can’t believe how one sided these unhappy democrats are acting and not even listening or caring about the real truth that’s happening right now!

Suzanna says:

Funny how you say that when it is exactly the opposite. Trump supporters are not rioting in the streets. Trump supporters are not name calling and labelling everybody who shares a different view than them. Trump supporters aren’t hating and judging.
I can tell you also that had the election gone the other way, they wouldn’t take to the streets and riot either.
Take a step back and look at what’s really happening here. Media propelled madness. Trump supporters aren’t who are dangerous. Sorry.
Tell me now, how do you explain that?

Jeanne Bowlan says:

You need to read from news sources other than the right-wing garbage. Hillary and the occult?! OMG. You are delusional.

Alisha says:

Insightful and honest post. Thank you, Jennifer. My best to you and your family.

Dorothy says:

With all due respect, we all heard Trump’s words out of his own mouth. We all heard hateful rhetoric from some of his supporters. It’s time to own it and stop the blame shifting to anyone or anything other than the people who spoke those words. Trump alone is responsible for his words, actions and behaviors.

Aimee says:

I don’t have to defend or explain my vote to anyone. When did personal choice become a topic for debate?

Mandy says:

Toni, you put into words exactly what my thoughts have been all along. I ponder quite often ways to articulate to the world my thoughts without coming across in a negative way. I am able to sit back and discuss other party’s views with an open mind. My intentions are not to be combative, but to understand why a few of my friends voted for Clinton. I get a lot of the same responses. Racist, sexist, makes fun of individuals with disabilities, etc….In my opinion, I feel as if Trump’s son, Barron, may be on spectrum of Autism. Trump has been an advocate for Autism. You are right when you said Team Clinton and the media has made Trump look like a racist, sexist, arrogant monster. He has not said anything that would make him a racist. Personally, I feel as if the Republicans are being attacked. The negative remarks, the destruction of personal property, theft, violence, pre-planned, name calling, staged marches, ect….. This type of behavior is what I call bullying and racist.

Mari says:

Jennifer I commend you for presenting your story with love and open mindedness. I don’t get a sense of one sided view but I do see some of my fellow commenters still have blinders on. As a whole this idea of the United States is a lie. At any chance you can see the tides turn and this is just the latest example. A rich white man is running this country, a rich white man who has no respect for differeances. I feel they both were poor candidates but at least she has experience in politics this dude just biz wiz and knows how to make the rules not apply to him. It’s gonna take hope in our hearts and live in our minds to get through these next four years.

Litha says:

Who is the Trump you speak of? The one who continually said racist and sexist things or the one who put a “c” indicating colored on applications to deny? Both Trumps are racist.

Moana says:

Thank you so much for your post. I am so far from being racist and voted for Trump. And i am very much mormon! I don’t see that Trump is racist at all!!! And I get so tired of people making me feel like I’m racist! I love people of all religions and color, etc. But get so tired of the manipulation of those who are trying to make me feel guilty. I am so grateful for the opportunity to vote and proud to say I voted for TRUMP!

Valerie says:

Thank you. I can never imagine the racism you have had to live with. I have been with my wife for 25 years before finally being able to legally marry. I am fearful that we will once again not have any protections as we grow older together. There are so many people here in Florida from Cuba, Haiti that I know that are worried about riding their bicycles to work in fear of getting picked up.
Whether any of these things actually happen is yet to be seen, but to live in fear of hatred for no reason is so sad.

Gina says:

It is a fact that he is associated with the alt-right group. (A racist hate group) He is planning to appoint the chief leader of this hate group, Steve Bannon, as his chief of staff. This was also his campaign Manager during his campaign. Please fact check things before you claim it’s the media that’s making false claims. Do your research. It’s people like you that don’t fact check and think you know and spread misinformation that has gotten us here. http://www.cbsnews.com/news/steve-bannon-and-the-alt-right-a-primer/
http://www.cnn.com/2016/11/10/politics/steve-bannon-trump-chief-of-staff/

Vonnie says:

Thank you! Hopefully we can all try to understand both sides of all issues. There are many thoughtful replies here also and thank you all for that! I feel Obama, OUR President, needs to come forward again and help calm this nation!

Chritina Reimann says:

I am a registered Democrat and I voted for Donald Trump. Do I like everything he said during – and before the campaign – No! Do I think he will do everything he talked about during the campaign – No! Some of his promises were definitely the “politics as usual, anything to get elected” type of promises. And I can see where people would be afraid of the environment that his rhetoric might make some racist, bigot, homophobes might be emboldened to act on their twisted ideas. I was born in the 50’s and went thru the protest of the 60’s. I believe in protest. I do not believe in rioting, destruction of property or violence. And though I voted for Trump because I don’t believe in abortion, do believe in gun rights and legal immigration, I hope that the senators and representatives who were elected with him will work with him to do good things for our country. I am hoping that the career politicians will realize that a lot of us weren’t so much voting for Trump as we were sending a message that we are tired of the way things have gone. I wish they had given us better candidates to vote on. I know a lot of people voted for one of the other two candidates as a way of protest. I did not because I felt that would be throwing my vote away. I could not get behind Hillary Clinton. I would love to see a woman president but not her. I just wanted to let you know not everyone who voted for Trump is a crazy or a deplorabe, and a lot of us struggled and are still struggling with our decision. I hope the republicans and the democrats look at this election and start thinking about what the people they are suppose to represent really want from them. I hope the media goes back to reporting the news, good and bad, with less commentary and more unbiased observation. If there is injustice, shine a light on it. I also believe in live and let live, and personal responsibility,so I don’t fit very well into any group. I was raised a Catholic and even though I am not a regular attendee I guess that has shaped a lot of my beliefs. And I don’t usually let people know who I voted for because I don’t believe I should have to, so why am I running on here? I read your article because my cousin shared it on facebook, (She was backing Hillary, though I never asked her about) and I could see your point of view. Thank you for giving me the nerve and a place to respond. God Bless you and your family.

KATHY says:

WHY AREN’T YOU TALKING ABOUT THE RIOTS? THE OTHER TERRIBLE THINGS BEING DONE AFTER THE ELECTION? THE WHITE MAN WHO WAS JERKED OUT OF HIS CAR AND BEATEN BY BLACKS BECAUSE HE VOTED TRUMP. THE ATTACK ON WHITES. WHY WHITE PEOPLE HAVE TO CONFIRM 24/7 “I’M NOT RACIST, I’m NOT A BIGOT ECT” CONSTANTLY DEFEND THEMSELVES AGAINST ACCUSATIONS THAT DO NOT APPLY. NOT JUST THE RACISTS, NOT JUST THE BIGOTS, BUT EVERY WHITE, JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE WHITE. VICTIMIZATION IS ALL THE WAY AROUND.
AS FAR AS TRUMP GOES YOU OBVIOUSLY GET ALL OF YOUR INFORMATION FROM BIASED, MAIN-STREAM MEDIA. HAVE YOU CHECKED OUT WIKI-LEAKS? THE FBI SURE ARE! JULIAN ASSANGE? GEORGE SOROS, AND WHY HE WANTS A RACE WAR, AND AMERICANS DIVIDED? SO YOU HAVE BEEN CALLED THE NASTY N WORD. WERE YOU JERKED OUT OF YOUR CAR AND BEATEN AFTER YOU VOTED??? I CAN’T SAY I’M WHITE. I HAVE A LITTLE BIT OF THIS, A LITTLE BIT OF THAT, AND A LOT OF OTHER I DON’T EVEN KNOW ABOUT. POSSIBLY BLACK, GERMAN, POLISH. WHO THE HECK KNOWS, AND WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE. THERE ARE A WHOLE LOT OF BLACKS BETTER OFF THEN ME FINANCIALLY. SO WHAT! I NEVER HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO GO TO COLLEGE. SO WHAT! MY MOM RAISED FOUR KIDS ALONE WITHOUT HELP, WELFARE. WE WERE POOR. SO WHAT! YOU GET UP EACH DAY AND MAKE THE BEST OF YOUR LIFE, YOUR DAY, YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES, OR YOU GET UP EVERYDAY AND COMPLAIN, AND THROW FLAMING TORPEDOS.

Megan says:

I agree and disagree. But please dont leave out the hateful messages for cops. Kill All Pigs, Fry em’ like bacon, rape their wives and daughters. More than enough hate on all sides. I am a LEOW also, I know as well as most if not more. So while minorities are being hated and mexicans are being deported and gays are being bashed for their life style, remember that cops and their families are now a part of that. Peace, Love and Happiness

Dre says:

THIS!! Thank you <3

KATHY says:

There has been an ongoing war against America, Americans, and the first thing you do to destroy a nation, is to divide it’s people. Major effort has been given to that.
As far as deportation. There is a reason for legal immigration. It protects a nations people physically, and financially. The law has been disregarded, and it has brought nothing but trouble to all Americans. I do Not see color. I see Character. I see peacemakers, and I see sowers of dissention. I have brothers, & sisters of every race, & color, and their race and color are irrelevant.
As Morgan Freeman stated ” Quit calling me black, and I will quit calling you white”
But people Cannot wallow in victimization and progress mentally, spiritually, or culturally.

Marion Chase says:

Thank you for writing this piece. I am numb but still a jumble of endless tears, fear for my country and my children, and rage.

I love my country, my LBGT friends, my family, and my Muslim friends and family. The anguish in their eyes fills me with rage because these are good, hard working people.

I do not see the people who claim to not be racist condemning the overt signs of hatred surrounding us and endorsed by the president elect during his campaign.

I will be a good citizen and pay my taxes. As a veteran, I will support my country and love those Stars and Stripes! I will not go low and remain high in these endeavors. I will stand up for the LBGT community, people of color (my children are a beautiful mix of black and white), Muslims, and Jews. I will fight for education and do ALL I can to preserve the civil rights our glorious government has bestowed upon its citizens.

When confronted with ugly, I am going to work so hard to show love. I pray for you and my country. Please pray for me.

Jenuine says:

Joanie,

I am also a registered nurse and my son was born at 33 weeks. I voted for Trump but he was not even my third choice. I donated money to Ben Carson’s campaign because I appreciated the fact that he educated himself before forming an opinion. He did not take his advisors opinions and run with them.

Hillary’s stance on abortion was my most recent concern, but truthfully I have not liked her for over 20 years. You see, I was working in Washington DC when Bill Clinton was first elected. There was a nurses strike at that time and she said some pretty awful things about nurses and how greedy they were. Add to that, I’m married to a white police officer whose colleagues are being portrayed in the media as bloodthirsty racist barbarians. Over the past year she has indicated that she agrees with this assessment, promising to put money toward “retraining” of police officers.

Within his first three months in office, Obama inserted himself into a police controversy called “Beergate”. He literally called the police officer “stupid” for aggressively questioning a black man, who happened to be breaking into his own home. He questioned police officers’ motives before the investigations were even complete. He has created a toxic atmosphere in this country where people mistakenly believe racism can only be perpetrated by white people and the only way to get rid of racism is to annihilate the white race. The ACA has failed miserably and as it continues to roll out, it is detrimentally affecting people’s ability to access health care.

Hillary’s remedy was to put more money into it. I won’t deny racism has a strong hold on our country and all over the world, but until you can admit that racism of any kind is wrong, it will continue. Considering that she promised Obama 2.0 and has no respect for basically every facet of my life, there was no way I could vote for her! I pray Trump surrounds himself with good people to guide him in making the best decisions for all our citizens!

Megan says:

The best reply by far. Thank you sir for your service. I am a LEOW so I know the sacrifice. My goal is to keep me and mine safe against ANY and ALL who want to cause them harm. That is not racist, but human nature in my book. Thank you again.

KATHY says:

OK PEOPLE RESEARCH HILARY & KKK.
RESEARCH HILARY AND FOUNDER OF PLANNED PARENTHOOD MARGARET SANGER. HILARY’S IDOL.
MARGARET SANGER A FEMALE HITLER WHO STATED “COLORED PEOPLE ARE LIKE WEEDS THAT NEED TO BE EXTERMINATED. THE FOLLOWING IS HILARYS OPINION OF HER: ““It was a great privilege when I was told that I would receive this award. I admire Margaret Sanger enormously. Her courage, her tenacity, her vision … When I think about what she did all those years ago in Brooklyn, taking on archetypes, taking on attitudes and accusations flowing from all directions, I’m really in awe of her. There are a lot of lessons we can learn from her life, from the causes she launched and fought for and scarified for so greatly.”

Michelle says:

I agree with you 100%! So many of the misinformation has come from the media and he DID apologize, whereas she never has…for anything. America has spoken, so let’s move in and unite. We all live here!

A dedicated veteran who loves this country passionately

Alan Payne says:

I just wanted to thank you for writing this. I am a while male that grew up morman in Mesa Arizona. I have spent most of my life believing that except for a few ignorant people the race issue was something that had been left in the past. A few years ago I met a friend that let me know from his own experience I had been so wrong. As a white man I apologize for my ignorance and pray that we can some day very soon create a world that doesn’t see race or religion. Trump indicted himself every time he opened his mouth. This was a very well executed blog! Thank you.

Karen says:

Thank you.
I voted for Trump for the same reasons you did

#NotmyPrez says:

His own words from his own mouth! Do a little research of your own and quit blaming the media for your world view.

Jess Warner says:

THANK YOU for this well written, beautiful post! These are things I often say but I feel like the effect of me (a privilege white women) thinking Trump is racist puts people to sleep. (I’ve even had friends say to me “the media just blows things out of proportion) I wish so much that I could make a difference in what I’m saying and supporting to make America a safe place for everyone. THANK YOU.

David Pratt says:

Amen. The Hillary campaign machine convinced SO MANY people that Trump is actually this horrible person. It’s sad to see friends fall for a lie hook, line, and sinker.

Doris says:

Beautiful reply…just so well spoken ?

Tanya says:

You are saying the man who got sued twice for refusing to let Black people live in his properties is not racist?

The man who said yeah, I probably said it after his lawyer said Trump told him he didn’t want Black people counting his money?

Who had to pay a $200,00 fine for refusing to let Black workers or gamblers on his casino floor when a white guy who was offended by them requested he do so??

Who said out of his own mouth that Mexicans are rapists?

How will you identify yourself as a Trump supporter of you are attacker for your color?

His own words and his own actions. That’s not the media. Those are things he actually did and said.

kathy says:

Trump supporters are racist or subservient woman or misogynistic are a combination . They are all hypocrites. In America you can say anything about a woman and as long as you have money get away with it. The things the right said about Michelle Obama were horrible, while now your new first lady is a nude model who slept her way to the top. When ever you say anything about Trump one of his supporters will say you are a lefty. Well I believe in the death penalty I believe there are too many radical muslims in North america and Europe. But the rest of the world knows Donald Trump is a racist fascist and the religious right in America are hypocrites. I hope and pray that they people of America treat Donald Trump and his gold digging ho of a wife exactly how they treated the last president. You have someone as our next president that thinks grabbing a woman by her pussy is ok.

Phil says:

Thank you so much for writing this. Saying its well written doesn’t do it justice. Its amazing and nails so many points on so many fronts. I wanted to take a moment and let you know personally that I shared this to my facebook wall in hopes others can gain perspective, or just feel good knowing they aren’t alone with these thoughts and feelings. Fight on Jennifer, stay loud.

Kimmie says:

I’m a 47 year old wife, daughter, mother, and grandmother. I’m college educated and financially secure. I voted for Trump. My vote wasn’t about “me”. I wasn’t happy about it either. But I truly, TRULY believe the nation wouldn’t survive 4 years of HC “securing Obama’s legacy”. BTW, I voted for Obama, too. Once. Then I watched him….I watched him apologize for our country overseas. I watched him try to REASON with thugs and terrorists killing our citizens. I watched him lead our country into a place of global impotence and laughing stock, to the point that tiny, sandy specks feel empowered to fire missiles at our navy ships! And when I heard the media say we needed HC elected to “secure Obama’s legacy” my stomach turned. Survival requires unwavering, unblinking strength. Its not pretty, and I don’t have to agree with every stupid thing that falls out of Trump’s mouth to believe he is the better bet, of the two choices I had, to restore the strength and respect we MUST possess in order to have a nation left to protest in, argue about, or try to improve. Its that simple. It wasnt about me and my comfortable life. It was about my children, and grandchildren, and yours. It was to me a common sense matter of “first things first”. We have to survive to be able to improve. I still believe he was the best choice, of the sorry “choices” we were offered. And I sincerely hope, by the next election, BOTH parties will find their way to nominate actual decent, moral, ethical, honest leaders with a genuine vision of peace and prosperity, and a plan to get there. Im dismayed that so many are burning energy protesting an unchangeable fact, but I respect their right to do so. Hopefully they will soon see the bigger picture, and focus all that energy in a way that will matter. For those using it as an excuse to fight with anybody they even THINK may disagree, I hope for them speedy prosecution to the fullest extent of the law, and I pray for every citizen’s safety. Meanwhile,I’m hoping Trump’s business and negotiating abilities position this country in a much stronger, respected place on the global scale, for the sake of its survival.

Joyce says:

What we are seeing in Ameri-duhhh (My name for our country that is acting like they have not a clue…) right now is a powder keg in a pressure cooker. All of the people that harbor hate towards other groups of people because they don’t want to see others prosper. All of the progress made by other groups that have struggled to get on equal footing with the rest of the country. We are making this country into a war zone. We won’t have to worry about refugees and foreigners coming here – no one will want to. We are destroying each other because of our differing choices. Choices that are supposedly protected by our constitution. Hate-filled rhetoric and speeches filled with vitriol is how we got here. Those that did not like civil rights and civil progress felt that they could come out strong with their hate and venomous actions just because someone in the public venue was saying the things that they themselves had been keeping silent on. I have no answers on what will make this right… Except…. Hate will not rid this country of hate. Only love can do that. We may have different political parties, different churches, different skin colors, different family structures. Yet, we all have breath of life as a human being. Our goal should be to be tolerant of others. And, if we see someone that is hateful and spreading hate, if we can’t dialogue with that person, we should not be silent about that person if their attacks will hurt others. We thought we’d made progress, but in electing a person that is so openly a charlatan, trickster, hustler, liar, accused rapist, and, because of some of the people he is surrounding himself with (Read about some of his selections on the Southern Poverty Law Center site), possibly a racist, we a suffering the consequences of this election. Not to say that deep down, his opponent was or is any better. (I don’t like some politicians at all. Too many of them lie to get elected. Then, they have no intentions of keeping their pre-election promises. They drain the coffers dry and make themselves richer and their constituents poorer.) There is much in her background that many were not in agreement with, too. If she had won, there’d still be protests and rioting. Most definitely, because the poison had been planted. And those that were prone to get riled up would have taken the bait, and they would be the ones in the streets crying foul. Maybe our parties and their policies have failed us. Maybe, by not holding our politicians accountable, we have failed them. This election is the result of much failure. Failure abounding like the stench of dung on farms: we have to drive further and further away from it not to smell it as strongly, but the noxious skunk of it remains in our being long after we have passed the farm. It’s definitely not alright to hate and to cultivate hate. Some of us may voice that we don’t like your stance, but when you hate, and hate is what you get in return, check yourself. No, two wrongs do not make it right. But someone has got to be bold enough to stand up and be open to understanding that which is foreign to their own being. We have made this country, which has NEVER stopped being great (Why does half the world desire to come here if not for the fact that this is a great country.), into a battleground akin to some of the modern conflicts that have afflicted and affected the rest of the world. We each have a responsibility to change it, fix it. It’s not time for pointing fingers at who should do what: WE ALL SHOULD ASPIRE TO MAKE IT WORK!

Jenny says:

This was beautifully written and full of empathy and compassion. Thank you.

Carisa says:

This is enlightening. It appears Trump’s voters are craving change in the worst way, literally.
First, let’s define what racism is. For those claiming Trump is not racist, Paul Ryan in fact said that Trump’s words describing Judge Curiel were “the textbook definition of racism.”

Second, for those who hate HRC based on her numerous “criminal” investigations and lies, compare her record (she’s been exonerated on all counts) to Trump’s record on Politifact.org. It is irrefutable that Trump is far more dishonest. Trump has numerous lawsuits pending, including defrauding real people. His “foundation” is a self-dealing joke. Look at what he is already backtracking on: the Wall, draining the swamp, repealing all of Obamacare (which will blow up the deficit), the Iran nuke deal, etc, so he deceived voters about those things to get elected.

Trump cannot force companies to manufacture here, so a disastrous trade war is surely coming. I want better for my kids. I want them to succeed with relevant market-driven education. I want them to live in a clean, unpolluted environment. Do you really want a gutted EPA? That’s what you voted for. Do we want dirty coal production, oil pipelines, polluted water and air?

These were my top considerations when I cast my vote for HRC.

Lori says:

Thank you for this, it speaks my sentiments well.

I would add something thought. “If you voted for Trump for other reasons…”

If you voted for Trump for other reasons then you are poorly informed.

If you voted out of economic interests, then you must be an affluent white person. Because his economic policies are designed to benefit only those people.

If you voted for him because he’s a successful businessman and that’s what this economy needs, then you did not look at his business record. He is a horrible businessman unless your definition of success is “Not totally squandering your inheritance.” He would have done better leaving his money in an index fund, and would not have left the trail of financial ruin behind him that he has.

If you voted for him because he’s an outsider, then you didn’t look at his history. He’s as insider as you can get, he’s played the money in politics game for as long as he’s been in business. Just because he’s never held office doesn’t mean he’s an outsider.

If you voted for him because you believe Hillary is some sort of security risk, then you chose to disgregard the opinions of those who protect us for a living, most of whom are republican.

If you voted for him because you believe Hillary is a crook then you are guilty of reasoning by headline. There are no facts to support it.

So, basically, the choices are bigotry or ignorance. There is no data to support any of the things people say they believe about him, those people believed what they wanted to in complete disgregard of fact.

But the truth – verified in analysis after analysis – is that thing that predicted support for Trump more than anything was hostility towards women and minorities.

You can say that wasn’t why you did it all you want, but being ok with those things means that your are ok with those things, and there wasn’t a single other reason to vote for him that is borne out by reality.

I find it really hard to want to build a bridge to that place.

Marko Jaric says:

“So if you say you are not racist, that you do not agree with the things Trump has said about minorities or Muslims. Say it!”

Here is the whole problem with your thesis! You have bought into the liberal medians potrayal of Trump. We DO agree with the things which he has said about minorities and Muslims, because nothing he has said has been racist.
1. We are sick of the lack of enforcing the immigration laws, and we want them enforced. That is not racism.
2. We have zero obligation to accept refuges from countries which are known to hate America and Americans. Requiring strict vetting of people from dangerous countries, who already have and would likely continue to murder Americans is not racism it is pragmatism.
Trump has made terrible statements about women and their appearance, which have been so offensive that I nearly didn’t vote for him. However, the immigration and refugee stuff I 1,000% agree with!

coast mom says:

‘Whether Trump’s election reveals an “inherent malice” in his voters is irrelevant. What is relevant are the practical outcomes of a Trump presidency. Trump campaigned on state repression of disfavored minorities. He gives every sign that he plans to deliver that repression. This will mean disadvantage, immiseration, and violence for real people, people whose “inner pain and fear” were not reckoned worthy of many-thousand-word magazine feature stories. If you voted for Trump, you voted for this, regardless of what you believe about the groups in question. That you have black friends or Latino colleagues, that you think yourself to be tolerant and decent, doesn’t change the fact that you voted for racist policy that may affect, change, or harm their lives. And on that score, your frustration at being labeled a racist doesn’t justify or mitigate the moral weight of your political choice.’

coast mom says:

From Slate: “Whether Trump’s election reveals an “inherent malice” in his voters is irrelevant. What is relevant are the practical outcomes of a Trump presidency. Trump campaigned on state repression of disfavored minorities. He gives every sign that he plans to deliver that repression. This will mean disadvantage, immiseration, and violence for real people, people whose “inner pain and fear” were not reckoned worthy of many-thousand-word magazine feature stories. If you voted for Trump, you voted for this, regardless of what you believe about the groups in question. That you have black friends or Latino colleagues, that you think yourself to be tolerant and decent, doesn’t change the fact that you voted for racist policy that may affect, change, or harm their lives. And on that score, your frustration at being labeled a racist doesn’t justify or mitigate the moral weight of your political choice.”

Lori says:

Courteously, those opinions ARE racist, because they are based on premises that are factually untrue, yet because they are about people who are not like you, you believe them.

The Obama administration actually deported more illegal immigrants than any other administration. Net immigration from Mexico is zero.

Refugees are less likely to commit crimes in their new countries than native born citizens.

These things are both factually true, confirmed by many sources. So if you choose to believe the opposite, then it is because you want to. And if you want to believe that people who are different races than you are more disposed towards untenable or criminal behavior, then you are racist.

That is, in fact, the definition.

Luisa says:

Yes! Exactly! Well-said! There is a great effort focused on labeling those who supported a Trump presidency as intolerant racist people. The “open-mindedness” stops when someone has different views and values and others don’t get to define what these are for me based on their personal perspective—”How can you support racism by supporting Trump?” Setting the agenda much?. Each person has a right to their opinion and should not be socially outcast because it does not conform to the television/leftist rhetoric and/or made-up/paid-for anecdotes. BTW, I am a naturalized American woman from Mexico.

Jared says:

I hope the next article is titled “To My Friends Who Voted for Hillary & Claim They Aren’t Advocating Murder.”

Hillary Clinton is “Pro-Choice” including late term abortion. Anyone with eyes to see would know this is murder. Any Christ follower who has a relationship with the creator would not advocate murder and therefore vote for Trump.

Look in the mirror and realize you too are racist. There are varing degrees of racism. You are obviously racist towards anyone not black and you make judgements about them for how they vote!
Stop perpetuating racism by whining about it. Start erasing racism by actually doing good things for the world and the glory of God and that actually honors God.

By the way, I see you have a “I am a Mormon” sticker on your website. Perhaps you should study the history of your own prophet Joseph Smith. Read an actual original copy of the book of Mormon. Joseph Smith was 10x the racist over Trump.

Marie says:

Well said Jeremy, as a woman and a Trump voter I agree.

Gary Davis says:

Patricia, are you a member of the International Church of Christ ? GD

Rebecca says:

I see your point of view, but I’m confused about a few things, help me out.

This not only pertains to your writings, but some things I have witnessed over the past couple of days after the election. Yes, “whites” are privileged. People of color can’t just walk into a store and grab a bandaid that matches their skin color, because the bandaids are meant for people who lack melanin. And I’m not being facetious. This is a white mans world. I will admit there is ton of bias against “blacks”. Racism is very much alive, especially in the justice system. One thing I don’t understand is, how is arguing about who has faced more adversity contributing to a solution for racial relations. This is not directly pointed at you, I appreciate your sincerity and understanding, but I continue to see a divide. I see so much hate from both sides, its disturbing. We are all humans first! This shouldn’t be about who is the victim or who is to blame. We have to stop spreading a well-intentioned message with condescending and hateful remarks that speak up against one another. Calling “white” people privileged or using terms such as “white fragility” is destroying the message! It’s hiding behind hate and prejudice for another race. It’s a contradiction!

Why does skin color even have to come into play? Am I naive for asking that question? Let me leave you with a quote I love and that we should all share with one another:

“We are sun and moon, dear friend; we are sea and land. It is not our purpose to become each other; it is to recognize each other, to learn to see the other and honor him for what he is: each the other’s opposite and complement.”

I for one, don’t care who you voted for, but by keeping this division alive, we are solving nothing, but we continue to tear everyone apart by choosing a side. We are humans first.

Rolf says:

You’ve really nailed it. Thank you!

Kelly says:

People tend to remain ignorant when the facts don’t line up with what they choose to believe. As a citizen from a family that has been in the United States before there was a United States, I believe we have a civic duty to know what our government is doing in our name. The only way to do this is to read actual news. Read a local newspaper, and read a national newspaper at least once a week. If you watch CBS News, try watching Fox a couple times a week, or vice versa. Try to be aware of all that’s going on, not only listening to people who tell you what you want to hear. Before you believe something you heard about Trump, check the facts on Politifact.org

It’s important to realize that I don’t get to decide who is offended by what I say. Even if I don’t intend to offend someone, I need to respect that saying something that I am told is offensive is not OK. And if I really want to be united with others, I need to listen and understand them.

Rolf says:

Having read all of the comments to this blog post, it is all too apparent that a lot of people simply cannot take responsibility for their actions. Unless all of your news comes from fake news, you should know without a doubt that there is plenty of proof that Trump is racist, misogynist, xenophobic, and homophobic. He has also made fun of veterans and the disabled. If you simply cannot believe that of him, just look at his transition team and the people who he is considering for top government posts. They are cut from the same cloth. If you voted for Trump it doesn’t automatically mean you are also racist, misogynist, xenophobic, or homophobic. But that goes along with the territory of electing a man who clearly built a campaign on hate. When you vote for someone who demonstrates no respect for minorities, you really do not care about minorities either. Plain and simple. If you don’t believe that is fair or true, then I expect you to hold the new president’s feet to the fire if and when he says racist, xenophobic, misogynistic things, or tries to enact (or enable) racist, xenophobic, misogynistic policies or activities.

Dave Summers says:

So guess I’m a racist… who knew?

But what about my friends which are some immigrants, black, women, and gay that voted for trump?

Oh that’s right, you can only be racist if you’re white

Jack says:

I know that the popular narrative is that Trump is a racist, but I’m not exactly clear on what it is exactly that he said that is racist. We are a nation of laws and borders, without which, I hasten to add, we would have no nation at all. There is nothing wrong with putting Americans first. I say this as an immigrants son who came here legally. And there is nothing wrong with vetting anyone and everyone who wants to come into this great country. As far as being uninformed about Hillary as you suggest, you have got to be kidding. You can watch all the congressional hearings on Benghazi and Hillary’s email debacle on youtube. If you watch the testimony of Lois Learner, Loretta Lynch, Comey, Hillary herself, and on and on, and you are still of the opinion that these people did nothing wrong and aren’t corrupt then there really is no hope for you. Lerner and Lynch both plead the 5th for crying out loud!
The American people were forced to buy a product they didn’t want and then fined when they didn’t buy it. Conservative groups had the IRS unleashed on them for no other reason than they were conservative. Again, you can find and watch all the hearings and see witness after witness lying through their collective teeth. Religious people had their livelihoods destroyed for not wanting to relinquish those beliefs. I would also add that if you look at the final polling map you will see that in order for Trump to have won, a good percent of those who voted for Obama switched sides because they are that disillusioned with the direction the liberals have taken this country. But, go ahead and call all them racist as well if it helps you sleep. The idea that someone thinks they have the right to make b.s. claims about what they “think” is in my heart based on who I voted for, and to make claims about my education, intelligence or anything else is, to use a word from Hillary…deplorable. Trump won because people are sick and tired of being called sexist, bigoted, homophobes by people like you, for having the temerity to hold a different set of political views. People are sick and tired of this corrupt administration. The people desperately want to have their faith in government restored, and it has absolutely nothing to do with race or gender. Drew a line in the sand and said enough. This is why the democrats lost the house, senate and presidency.

Theresa says:

Amen to this side as well!

Theresa says:

Thank you…. because there is this side of it too.

Kristin says:

Thank you for your grace-filled AND truth-filled perspective on this. I have been living in a bubble and am horrified to see what has been under the surface all along. You’re absolutely right – some of us simply didn’t see what was going on. The media is so skewed, that I honestly just don’t know what to trust anymore. But I have enough dear and precious friends who are already getting affected by these horrific events. I am just trying to learn – what can I do? Thank you so much. Blessings.

Jenine frost says:

Thank you on your kind, intelligent words. I really wish the disgusting media would actually broadcast your thoughts out. It’s truely moving. Americans response to this unimaginable chaos is to turn against each other. I am an American immigrant. My grandpa came here in the early 1900 during the potato famine. He was a slave for this country willingly, and fought for our freedoms in World War Two. He fought for a new life where equality was the goal. And won,now 100 years later we forget. Yes he had white skin however he was an immigrant and wanted to be here for a better life which he secured ghrough years of service. Racist is not the new life been there… done that..know your history. I will be American with you thank you for seeing through the real problem. With money comes power, and power is hard to take away.

Red says:

Toni, I believe everyone is entitled to their beliefs but I also see that you are choosing to be blinded by what is really being portrayed right in front of our eyes. Here’s a few examples like the one particular appointee who has ties to the white supremisist, to his parents who had involvement with the kkk and with that to my knowledge and the last I heard are HATE GROUPS. To the evidence of the sexual assault cases including a pending rape case that he’s trying to get suppressed and I can go on and on. Right now your comfortable with your choice but when they actually start to turn on you what will be your stance. True Hillary Clinton was not a perfect choice by any means but Bernie didn’t make the cut. But blinded rasism and mockery against anyone is unacceptable, mocking those with disabilities is a injustice to them who are struggling to have a say in this United States of America. So if you don’t see it now I wonder if you will recognize it when it knocks on your door or lord forbid that cross is burning in your front yard Ijs

GB says:

Jennifer, Thank you so much for writing this as I am desperately searching for an understanding of why I can’t seem to reconcile this in my mind. I am an American and I love this country dearly. I am also a first generation immigrant and I understand what drives people to leave where they were born; it’s a tough and isolating decision and although many Americans apparently do not believe that America is great, I truly think it is in comparison to a lot of other countries. That aside, until earlier this year I was happily living with my life partner. Since he disclosed to me that he was a Trump supporter months ago, our once amazing relationship has been STRUGGLING primarily because although I respect that we are different people (and we’ve know all along that we supported different parties politically) I can’t seem to disassociate Trump’s discriminatory behavior with my partner. Everytime I look at him I think “Do you condone this? How could you support this type of behavior?” It’s REALLY a challenge and I’m fighting to work through it; drowning in conflicting feelings. I’m talking to people, trying to understand the opposite view, trting to understand how people opted to kinda ignore his rhetoric. Im reading all I can and trying to belive my partner when he says that his voting for Trump was based primarily on a desire for change and as a stance against the “establishment”. Despite this though, i keep thinking … ” how could you want “change” so badly that you were willing to chose THIS kind of change? I mean I “get” the need for change … but to overlook THIS level of blatant hate talk and to risk what could be a bi-product of this kind of leadership? To reward this with your vote and the highest most respected seat in the land? Wow, Im trying so hard to understand. I know had this been any of the other republican candidates … sure I would have disappointed but I would have quickly recovered. This though … it has rocked my world. Thank you for making me feel less alone. I will continue ardently to try to understand. I promise to do so. Despite how I feel and the current stress on my personal relationship at this time, I only want the best for this country and the world so I hope and pray that I am wrong about Trump. I hope that my gut instinct is wrong this time and I hope that God will watch over us and bring us all together in his love. As he said “LOVE ONE ANOTHER, AS I HAVE LOVED YOU” Thanks again.

Kiera says:

This is a post i did after the election explaining why I could not vote for Hillary and it has nothing to do with racism.

After seeing all the hate going around I wish people could see real reasons why half of America voted for trump. The reasons below are why my family supported Trump…. not because we are racist white people that are p*&#y grabbers and womanizer. For those of you that know us most of our friends are Hispanic or African American so we are far from racist. My husband is far from a womanizer is actually the complete opposite and is attracted to heavier women like myself. So NO we do not stand by Trump bc of these reasons. Trump was simply the better option for us but not the candidate we originally wanted.
We homeschool our children and discussed the electoral college. We discussed the power of The Silent Majority, the same body that elected Nixon. We discussed the branches of government. We discussed campaign tactics. We discussed the country’s economic decisions that led us to this point. We discussed the demographics and the power of those swing states. We reviewed the electoral maps going back to the beginning of the country. This country has seen change. Can you believe there was a time when California voted Republican? Can you believe that it was more than once?

This election was won largely by the outcome of democratic counties in Wisconsin, North Carolina, Ohio, and Michigan. These are people who voted for Obama. These are areas that are hit with unemployment from the economic changes that have resulted from globalization. These are blacks, hispanics, women, and yes, whites too. These are people who are out of work, or fed up with what they are seeing. People who didn’t want to vote for Trump– as seen in the polling but people that are voting for a fighting chance.

I have seen so many posts about racism and bigotry. Believe it or not folks, those people who voted in those key states were not voting for those issues. They were voting to tear down the system. They were voting to bring jobs back. They held Bill Clinton responsible for repealing the Glass-Steagall Act. They held Obama responsible for the jobs going overseas and the abuse of the bail outs. They are people who are looking left and right and seeing H1B Visa holders all over their workplace that are working for less pay. They were holding Obama responsible for the pay increases in the Affordable Care Act, and holding Hillary responsible for supporting it. They were holding Bush responsible for the excessive spending. They were holding Greenspan accountable for his decisions from the Fed. They were holding the Democratic and Republican parties responsible for the overt and covert corruption.

If you are looking around and saying that Obama has been great for the people and that Hillary would continue that legacy, you are missing something– the people in those key states disagreed. Have you looked at the country through their eyes? That is a direct result of democratic policy. Yes, blame Bush, he didn’t help, but this is Bill Clinton. This is big banks. This is Hillary’s lifeline. Make this a moral issue if you want, but those people are out of jobs and finding Affordable Care not very affordable.

I have seen so many ignorant posts saying “this was about hate”. Well sure, you reduce the political ideology that separate the country to good vs evil, you could make that argument. But no, this was not about hate. This is politics people. That has escaped many this election because it has become a mantra of social and moral antics. What is your stance on taxes, foreign trade, education, immigration, health care, and regulation? I have had several friends claim to have a “hard core stance” on politics only to blink like a deer in headlights when you ask them a question on trade, or foreign policy. I saw a democrat post “at least we’ll keep the house and senate”. Really? That same person posted 100 times during this election. At least. And she did not know that the Republicans had the house and Senate. What a true Facebook warrior. Folks, there are many things to be concerned about here. The people who could not pass a basic 8th grade US government Class is astounding.

You can try and make this about morality. Or you could say that after 8 years of a republican followed by 8 years of a democrat and the possibility of 4 more years as a continuation of his policy that people wanted something new.

Look, my candidate wasn’t on the ballot. They never made it to game day. But you can’t say that there was only one choice. What happened here is incredibly clear and obvious. Unpredictable perhaps, but transparently clear. And it is clear in states like Michigan, Ohio, and North Carolina. It is clear from union workers. It is clear from industries like the auto industry, the tech industry, and the blue collar workers in many other fields.

I get it, you were extremely emotionally attached to your candidate. But if you’re saying this is about hate, you are being incredibly closed minded. There were other reasons to vote for Trump. He produced an action plan of his first 100 days in office that spoke to many many democrats and independents. Trump is not a traditional republican, you can’t forget that. You can’t forget that GOP did everything to block him. Hell, the media did everything they could to stop him. The people spoke, and there message is clear. And it is NOT “we are racist bigots, up with the white man”. That is just beyond stupid. It’s “we’re done”. It’s “let’s try something new”. It’s “we’re desperate”. It’s “we know what doesn’t work, we need something that will”.

I have seen so much name calling today. I have seen hate. I have seen people making their own children cry today. Trump did not do that, YOU did. To generalize and call 59 million people hateful racists is a bit ignorant don’t you think? Also, I mean, possibly hypocritical?

From CNN:
Trump won 42% of the women vote
Trump won 8% of the black vote

From NR:
Trump won 29% of the hispanic vote

In Florida Trump won a large portion of Cuban votes. Can we think that through for a second? Do you really think Cubans were voting for Trump because they are bigoted assholes? Nothing to do with their political climate of Cuba, big government, or communism right?

Will we see change? Absolutely. Will Trump be a good president? I have absolutely no idea but keep praying he will be and we will see change. But if you want to stop the hate, start with yourself! When you are name calling 59 million people racist, misogynistic, hateful, stupid, etc you yourself are being a giant raging bigot. BIGOT. Do you like that name? BIGOT?If not then please STOP it! You can’t call yourself tolerant and loving when you are constantly insulting half of America folks! You don’t get to be GOOD and MORAL only when it applies to people who share your views. We are all adults here and should be able to respect others opinions and views without such hate attached to it. Also for the love of God stop feeding into all of the media propaganda and do your own research. Make sure your research is credible and only then after you have done this form your opinion.
Get involved! Read!! Learn!!
Put your time where your mouth is.

Now I am PROUD to be an American. I’m proud that we have this process. And I’m thankful to every man, woman, and child who has died for it.. or fought to protect it. And I will be a proud American every time we elect a new president– regardless of party affiliation.

This is long winded, but if you’re honestly looking for an answer to “what do I tell my children”, or “how could this happen” hopefully this provided you with a tiny bit of insight. Or, you know, it could be that our country really is full of 59 million racist, womanizing, p*&#y grabbers that are finally relieved they can come out of the closet. To friends and family who voted for Hillary we still love each and every one of yall the same are will not let different views come between us.

Tommie says:

You are right. There is always two sides! BUT I listened to just about every speech Trump gave. He not only condoned violence, he encouraged it. He also made MANY racist remarks. But let’s put that aside fir now as well as HIS lies and deceit that was found at every turn. He has absolutely no experience in leading a country, it’s not the same as running a business (and he is not even that good at business either). He is extremely revengeful and thin skinned. Another leader is likely to
Anger him and the. We will be in a war! Do you have children? They will be fighting because trump got angry! What about jobs you ask ? He won’t be bringing jobs back! Hell he has made no move to bring his own third world manufacturing jobs back! He won’t pay a living wage here! I only ask you to think hard about this. If you think trump has your black back you might want to get some armor, before he stabs you in the back. I’m concerned for everyone in this country!!

Carla White says:

You just destroyed your whole post by saying your pulse,quickens when you see a truck with a lift kit lol.

Paul says:

So you would agree that is a racial profile?

Mia says:

Why is it only threatening or racist when it happens to a minority? I feel like I’m in a hated minority now. I fear a backlash against anyone who is not a 100% Democrat now. I feel that even if Trump does a good job people won’t change their views because they can’t get past their hatred. The people who spoke out against hate are now hating on those the think are haters. It’s so messed up now.

Nikki DesChamps says:

Beautiful! I am very afraid that people will find out sooner than later that “what you see is NOT what you get” with trumpy. He’s much, much worse than anyone realizes! The thought that he will have the power to activate a nuclear bomb is positively frightening~ He appears to be a potentially unbalanced, maniacal, media whore and a complete bully. America is going to need all the help she can get in the next four years.

Emily Lenz says:

Great post, Jennifer. Thank you!

Baby Making Mama says:

Thank you Emily!

Kjellyn says:

Thank you for this post,

I am a white Christian woman with two mixed raced children. Their father (my ex-husband) is Kenyan and Muslim – like Obama. I have really been worrying about how my kids will be treated now that the man who insisted Obama wasn’t American is President. I have been watching Facebook groups and posts and I am disheartened to see that the racist comments and memes and posts about the Obamas continue.
And to Mia who wrote above “I feel that even if Trump does a good job people won’t change their views because they can’t get past their hatred.” You mean like the Republicans did to Obama for 8 years? They wouldn’t let him do much of what he wanted to do that was good for the country. And the people just picked them apart in the most racist way…

Denise says:

Thank you Jennifer. You hit many points for me that helped me to understand my feelings towards friends and family who voted for a man who justified and bragged about having the power to grab women’s privates because of his celebrity status. I did not read all the responses to your article, so someone may have mentioned this before. I, and anyone with any iota of awareness of racism, know full well that if a single photo emerged of Michelle Obama just in lingerie during her husband’s race to the White House, it would have been beyond scandalous. Yet, a plethora of nude photos of the pres elect’s wife are seemingly no big deal… On the same note, if Pres Obama had been caught on tape saying the same lady-parts grabbing statements he would not be President. Or if he visually mocked disabled people. Or if he called women fat disgusting slobs with such vindictiveness. He has too little decorum or professionalism to be the leader and representative of my country. There is such a double standard. Period. I agree that the government system is broken and change is needed. I just think better choices of US government shaker uppers should have been made for all of the potential pres candidates long before. My friend’s little boy has an older brother with a disability. One day he said, “Mom, we just can’t have Trump for President, he is a mean man. We need to pray about it.” He had seen the clip on tv of trump mocking the disabled reporter. Out of the mouths of babes.

Denise says:

“He” has too little decorum or professionalism to be the leader and representative of my country. I meant trump, not Obama.

Lena says:

I voted for Jill Stein. My Husband voted for Trump. We are not racist,bigoted or homophobe.
I am in my mid 60s and have leaned Democrat most of my life. I just could not buy Hillary Clinton.
The email situation was a violation of ALL of our security. For those who work in government positions they will tell you they were angry .They (the lesser in government positions) would have been punished harshly. Hilllary has been caught more than once for NOT being honest.
I have been married for many years and have friends of every race ,creed and color.
Hillary was a not the answer.To many , we wish there had been 2 completely different candidates . Had she been elected she would have been put through the wringer over the email scandal-putting out country through more sad nonsense. And sadly ..I think we would have gotten into another war.
Aren’t we “war weary” enough?
2 days ago there was a rant about Trump and the burning of the. American Flag In 2006 Hillary Clinton proposed the same legal pursuits after speaking with Veterans who feel violated by citizens who burn the flag when they have put their lives at risk for this country. It never was mentioned -with the exception of one small story.
In all of my years I have NEVER seen such ugliness…and blatant lies from the media.It disgusts me
I wish we could have had 2 different candidates but these were the options.
I wish everyone woukd stop the vile ranting .It does absolutely no good for anyone.
I try to stay offline as much as possible. This machine can be a force or good but also can be creepy and overwhelming. Pay attention to what is real…and be kind and stop listening to garbage.
We all get hurt from it.

Jeff Scott says:

I read your article and find your words measured and logical- not at all like some of the people who dislike Trump and are now filling the internet with just plain hate speech about him and those who voted for him. What find interesting about what you said and that has been repeated multiple times throughout the campaign is that Trump is a racist largely in part not because of what he has said but because of the actions and words of the people who support him. This logic is ridiculous. If your neighbor brags to everyone how much he likes you and it is discovered that he is a pedophile, does that make you one? Hillary had some equally nasty people who supported her openly during the campaign so why was this same reasoning of ‘if bad people like her then she must just like them’ follow her? I am not a fan nor a supporter of Trump but I am tired of seeing people say that he a raging racist who is ready to burn a cross on the front lawn of the White House because David Duke likes him. That is just stupid.

Tahreem Khan says:

Trump is not racist because of what his followers said, he is not racist because of the way media portrayed him. He is horrible person because of his words and actions. He said that tons Muslims were celebrating in NJ after 9/11, he said that he would pay the legal fees for anyone who attacks someone in BLM, he said horrible things about Mexicans. He was also found guilty of racial discrimination in court years before this. He also started the birther movement.

I will continue to have conversations with everyone, but I also think EVERYONE needs to stand up for our rights right now. The fact is we have ALWAYS had to fight for equal rights in this country. If you voted for Trump with a heavy heart for those you knew would suffer because of it – please stand up for us – Muslims, Blacks, LGBT, women – and whoever you decide to fight for please do honestly and respectfully.

jim says:

I feel the time has come for you and everyone to wake up. I am conservative I work two jobs and have a baby boy my wife works and both of us have college degrees. We pay for health care and day care we pay for our food and a roof over our heads. We have cable and heat and hot water because we earned it. The last 8 years under Oboma has broken our spirit and made us think why we pay 200 dollars a week for day care when others go for free. Why is formula 150-200 a week while for some it is free. It has broken us and others like me you know the ones whom our leaders say cling to our bibles as tight as our guns? I am not racist I am not sexist I am the silent majority I am the person who plays by the rules pays my taxes and pays and pays and pays. What Benefits have I received from having a 10 year old car and living within my means while others drive better and collect welefare food stamps and all sorts of social programs not made available to my family. I ask is this country not reverse racist in fact expecting the young white American family to now pay for sins of almost 100 hundred years ago.

peblit says:

The President-elect has been giving some comments which many may misunderstand. To me, I don’t think he is a racist.

Paul says:

Racism is wrong I whole heartedly agree. Sadly I believe President Obama has set race relations back more than any President we’ve ever had. I also think you stereo typing people in lifted pick ups is racial profiling. However I also am willing to guess that you also believe you can’t be racist towards white.

Jillianne says:

Jennifer,

I agree with you. I am sorry you don’t feel safe checking the mail. I’m also sorry I don’t feel safe in some neighborhoods that are predominantly black simply because I’m not. I happen to think that social issues, crime in general, and violence against anyone considered different is going to continue escalating until the United States I grew up in is no longer recognizable. Yes, of course I know prejudice and bigotry have been alive and well in the US. However, people are now celebrating their idiocy by publicly declaring “make America white again”. The idiots obviously never paid attention to their history lessons.

One of the biggest things that needs to change is the use of the electoral college. It is an ancient relic that is not an accurate representation of American voters. Please remember that most of the Americans votes were not for the freaky dude shortly taking office.

Laura Cluney says:

Trump is not a real man. He is a misoginist

jim says:

The Electoral college needs to change? So New York,Texas and California should tell the people in Kansas whats best for them, that’s a proper and fair say? There voice is the voice that wants and begs to be heard. I hold traditional Values its important to my family and to shame me President Oboma Ms. Clinton has been going on obviously in Droves Millions of Amercian in Coal mine country have spoken people of Detroit have spoken Under Democratic control More jobs have left and pride in our country turned to shame that protected few were better than those who were not. Its a simple as our Democratic party and Liberals thru out this country have decided what is best for me instead of me and my family making decisions on whats best for us. Liberal women chant keep your laws off my body while the FBI has ordered Best Buy to check my computer for Child porn(Not that I watch that) if I ever have a problem with the PC. You want it both ways keep your laws off my body but listen to my cell phone calls and text messages. I want goverment out of my home I want government to be seen but not heard I want to protect the moral fibers that are left I want to say Merry Christmas and Under God. I want the left and the right to be heard but I don’t want to hear you. I want a business owner of a restraunt to decide if his restraunt is smoking or not smoking. I want liberals to show up to trumps inagauration but if Hillary won she stood by and ran on the slogan make America one….. I sit hear listen watch and never react no outlet to as Hilary supporters are known to be violent angry people. You Know what worse is Donald J. Trump could be the greatest president since FDR but the Left has him judged before he takes office nice fair hardy shake you all are giving him instead of just waiting and seeing. Nothing could be worse than the last 4 years and race relations can only improve. So everyone needs to relax about the well Trump said or he is a racist. Lets wait and see give him a fair shake after all Hillary could be entering office and who knows how many more soliders and police officers blood she would then have on the clinton name.

Someone says:

I voted for Trump because I felt he would improve the quality of our country. If you are looking at the President to be a role model, you’re the one with the problem. Look at how many despicable celebrities we have. There was a teenager who got popular off Vine, Nash Grier, who LITERALLY said more homophobic and racist things than Donald Trump. (As well as a very sexist video about what boys look for in girls)

But he’s still making millions because of the fact that 12 year old girls think he’s attractive.

The kardashains are TERRIBLE role models. Reality TV is terrible for people’s minds, filled with negativity, gossip, and arguing, yet it’s still allowed to air on television, despite the proven negative effect that is has on young children’s minds.

You know what I do as a parent though? I simple tell my children That the way these people act on TV is wrong. Just as I tell them that what Donald Trump says isn’t wrong.

I don’t like Donald Trump. Not one bit. But this isn’t a vote for who you think is the nicest, but instead who you think will improve the quality of our country more than the other.

It’s not a presidents job to teach people how to act. It’s their job to improve the quality of the country.

If you refused to vote for Donald Trump because of the dumb things he’s said, you need to stop supporting people like the Kardashians or CNN, or Nash Grier, who only spread negativity and paint a bad image for our children. Famous athletes included. How many of them have gotten off of sexual assault charges now??

Stop worshipping celebrities and letting them off the hook (As well as CNN and media).

As for Donald Trump winning, I believe it was a mixture of two things. People genuinely feeling he would improve the state of the country, and those who simply were fed up with political correctness.

Political correctness has transformed into a monster. There’s no denying this (Unless you’re part of the problem and biased). Many others have agreed that it was a backlash to what has become a hateful movement. (Which is ironic as it started as something positive)

No side is without fault

Someone says:

Sorry, meant to type “Just as how I tell my children that what Donald Trump says IS wrong”

(Referring to the dumb, offensive things he has said)

– By the way, there is footage of Hillary also saying offensive things. She was anti-gay marriage until very recently, as in before this election started. Trump had said far more negative things, but you can’t ignore that she’s no saint either)

Wow says:

Wow – I don’t know when the president hasn’t been considered a role model. I was so embarrassed when President Clinton wasn’t a good role model. Thank goodness TMZ wasn’t around when Kennedy was president. First of all, the new POTUS IS a reality star. Same as the Kardashians. Why do we say to children “You can grow up to be president”?. Is that now code for “You can be the most powerful person on earth and everyone will allow you to be a pig and you won’t be accountable.” Watching DT is poison for our children – as is most reality TV. Now – if Frederick Douglass is in your home school curriculum – you have my respect. Important for them to have a 360 degree view of the US and the world.
BTW – Jennifer – GORGEOUS family. Looks like the picture that came with the frame!! I’m sorry that you and all of my brown friends get the side-eye from my racist white brothers and sisters.

Kat says:

Great initial post by Jennifer, written with far more sensitivity and respect than I was able to muster right after the election. Trump is an absolute asshole! Whoever thinks he was a good choice for President is either racist or stupid (or as my pastor says, “misinformed”, which is a nice way of saying stupid). Honestly, the man is just plain a moron. The right-wing powers knew this and that’s the only reason they have been sucking up to him…he’s so stupid he’ll do anything to get good ratings and he’s got his nose so far up Bannon and Putin’s asses, it’s sickening. All you right-wing so-called Christian “patriots” are the reason Trumputin is in power. You SUCK! And I don’t hate you…I pity you for your stupidity. Please building a fucking wall – around yourselves.

John says:

The problem is we only have two choices. I may only agree with 10% of Trump’s views but if I only agree with 5% of Clinton’s then what the heck am I supposed to do? We need more options. And yes, there are MANY people who voted for Trump who dont like or agree with him, they just disliked and disagreed with Clinton more.

Dave says:

You make me proud to be a Mormon and an American. May Heavenly Father bless your home and family.

Andy West says:

Seriously, Jennifer? You’re afraid to go to your mailbox and your pulse quickens when you see a truck? Gee, then how must the Trump supporters feel? Because last I checked, they are getting assaulted, pepper sprayed, beaten with poles, sucker punched, and having their property stolen and burned… kinda like what black people experienced during the civil rights movement.

I HATE Trump, I would never vote for him (just as I would never vote for that witch Hillary), but it really is pathetic that you are using your public platform to spread misinformation.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

Andy West says:

Oh, and PS…

Saying you what you did is in and of itself, racist. If I were to say “I’m afraid I’m going to get mugged anytime I hear rap music”, would that be okay? NO! of course not!

You write and take cruises for a living, sweetheart. Get over yourself… you are not a victim of anything but your own ignorance.

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Hi! I’m Jennifer Borget



I'm a part-time journalist, full-time wife and mother striving to make the world a better place and inspiring others to do the same. This is the space where I share my journey in making the most of every day.

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